They Can’t Afford A Perm LMAO I’d Do It For Them But I Don’t Have The Materials :(

date her mom

this girl at uni was dressed sooo gay and then i found out she's just straight with a lesbian mom. dykebaiting is not a victimless crime 😔

If you still want fluff, may I interest you with Clef, Bright, Kondraki and Glass with an S/O who carries around a handbag (bigger on the inside) that's filled with plushies and they throw said plushies on the doctors when said doctors are having a bad day

SCP STAFF WITH A READER THAT THROWS THEM PLUSHIES WHEN THEY ARE HAVING A BAD DAY.

CHARACTERS: ALTO CLEF, JACK BRIGHT, KONDRAKI, SIMON GLASS.(all platonic)

DR CLEF

✽ Today was shitty, to say the least. He had a lot of nightmares about her

✽ Today he was trying to be the funny asshole he always is, but he was more jumpy. If someone touched him and he didn't saw them he'll literally stumble back and his breath would quicken.

✽ He was now drinking some coffee, his lip a little bloody because of how hard he was bitting it. The moment he put his cup down and got up to go and do work he felt how he was punched by something.

✽ He looked down and saw a teddy bear, he took it and started looking around confused until he spot you.

✽ You were a Safe type SCP, a humanoid that liked to make people happy. You always carried around a bag similar to Santa's and would pull anything from it.

✽ He rolled his eyes but kept the plushie the whole day, he even ranted to it about the horrible soup and tried to give it sum soup so it could know that, it was indeed, horrible.

✽ Before he left he went to your containment cell with a little box, some rings and stuff in it. Inside your cell was a normal room, white walls with some red, yellow and purple paint sprayed on it, a bed, a desk with art supplies and a TV.

✽ He looked around and frowned when he realized you weren't there, which was weird cause your time to hang around the facility was over.

✽ He almost drops the box when you hugged him from behind and he stood still as a rock to then let himself relax in your embrace.

✽ "Hey kiddo, got you something, consider it a thanks"

DR BRIGHT

✩ He is always having a bad day, he's just good at hiding it.

✩ He was angry this time, well more of a mix of emotions. He just discussed things regarding TJ's situation with Mikell and his blood was boiling.

✩ He was close to just shutting off his brain and continuing his day as if nothing happened, to then unload in his house until he was hit with a plushie.

✩ He managed to grab it before it fell and he stared at it for a while, to then search around who threw it to him.

✩ He heard your laugh and it made him smile, you really were a nice addition to this site. Always running around giving people things, hugs, helping them.

✩ You never got too close to him tho, so interacting with you this first time was a new thing.

✩ He turned around to thank you but you were gone, he looked back at the plushie and then around to make sure no one was there. He hugged it hard and he let some tears drop, he thought of his little brother and how one day he will get him out of here and make him live a happy normal life.

✩ He named the shark plushie Thomas, and he lays in his in site dorm.

✩ He would try to hang around with you a little more, would become a father figure probably.

DR KONDRAKI

✿ He was having a bad hangover, he had a fight with Draven, he was close to getting into a physical fight just because.

✿ He spent most of his day in the cafeteria, drinking way too much coffee. He almost left when you came running from nowhere and hugged him, he froze.

✿ Yeah it was his idea that you roam free since you only want to make people happy, but it still was weird to have a SCP do that.

✿ You then pulled out something from your bag, and he almost laughed at the plushie.

✿ It was something in between a fat ferret or a fat cat, either way he loved it and when you gave it to him he smiled.

✿ "Thank you kiddo, how about I get you some apple juice hm?"

✿ Your fast nod was enough for him, he got up, ruffled your hair and went to get you some apple juice.

DR GLASS

✧ So this man doesn't have the greatest relationship with his family, today his mom called and they both had a fight over the phone.

✧ Everyone could notice that Glass was rather mad today, he would have to take a few second to answer so he didn't sound like an asshole.

✧ So everyone tried to not make that much contact with him, and he kept himself in his office just speaking to people when needed.

✧ He heard some knocks and he sighed, syaing 'come in'.

✧ So you came in, went over to him and handed him a tiger plushie, or something like that.

✧ He just started at it for a while, then he looked at you, then back at the plushie. He took it and mumbled a 'thank you'

✧ You stayed around in his office helping him until he felt better.

✧ At the end of the day, Glass was back to his normal self.

YES THEY DO <3

(You’d know wouldn’t you bill)

f4f (fag4fag)

request??

vox x reader :>

scenario: vox teaches reader how to dance (like formally)??

God we love this flat screen tv more then is normal HAHA! I hope you like it because I’m so nervous nsgsjdbge I TRIED TO MAKE THIS AS IN CHARECTER AS POSSIBLE SOB

VOX X READER!! (Reader will be gn because anon didn’t specify!)

Warning; None!

this is my first fic! Please tell me if I did good or not :>

your sitting in Vox’s tower, bored as hell, you would usually wonder around but Vox requested for you to stay where you were, as he said that he wanted to teach you something ‘later’. It’s already later and he’s late. You groan in frustration, leave it to Vox to be late to his own plans.

after a few minutes he finally gets there, his smooth voice greeting you. “Why you stayed, perfect, sorry I’m late, Valentino held me up.” He says, you huff, it’s always Valentino this and Valentino that with Vox, as he makes it his duties to make sure Valentino doesn’t fuck everything up.

You look at him. “Yeah, it’s always Valentino.” You say, standing up, “Why did you want me to stay here Vox? You said you’ll teach me something?” You ask, he smiles at you, god his smile. He may sometimes be a lot to put up with but god that smile makes you feel butterflies every time you see it

As formal music starts playing you jump, forgetting that he can connect to any speakers. “Well, my dear, I thought I would try to teach you to dance. And before you say that you know how to dance I mean formally. Not all.. dumb like people think is dancing” he says with a sly smile as you roll your eyes.

“Alright then, teach me.” You respond, a slight smile on your face. As he walks to you he starts instructing you on where and how to stand when waiting for your dancing partner. “Stand a little straighter and to the left- Nono, my left! Look at me as well.” He bosses as he gets to you.

As he gets to you he clasps one of your hands in his and puts his other on your hip. “Alright, hold my hand and put your other on my shoulder. Yes, just like that, good, now step forward and step back, forward, back, turn too, we have to turn.” He explains, your frustration slight. “Are there a bunch of rules to this? It’s stupid.” You mumble, he then dips you, scaring you a little. “This is called a dip, I won’t drop you relax, your stiffer then a board.” He comments as he brings you back up.

You’re still a little tense when he brings you back up. “Sometimes I think you will drop me, you act like it” you respond, making him laugh as you continue the pattern. Forward, back, forward, back, turn. Then he spins you, catching you and dipping you, almost as if he’s been doing it his whole life and death. You’re less stiff but it’s because of the surprise. “That’s what I’m talking about!”

After about an hour of practice you got it down, moving in almost perfect sync with him. Forward, back, forward, back, turn, forward, back, spin, dip, forward and repeat. You’re smiling with him. “This is a lot easier now!” You say, laughing as he shakes his head. “Of course it is, it’s not like it’s hard in general!” He responds.

CUDSCBYDNYXDEEXDYN I HOPE YOU LIKE IT GRAH OMGGGGGG THIS WAS HARD AT THE BEGINING ND IT GOT PROGRESSIVELY EASIER TO WRITE HAHAHA

❄️The less you eat❄️

= The less hungry you are

= The skinnier you become

= The prettier you will be

It's simple maths. What's stopping you?

But if they do actually commit it would be my fault wouldnt it?

Splooge idk what to do so I have a genuine fear of commitment and I wanted to break up with this person because I’ve fallen out of love with them because they are a good person and all but I don’t love them as a partner anymore but then their dad passed away and I’m genuinely freaking out because idk what to do bc I can’t break up with her and she constantly wants like kisses and sex and I don’t want it anymore and she already went ahead once after I said stop and I’m just scared now and she said if I break up with her she’ll kill herself and she blamed me for trying to commit like idk what to do anymore

alright, take everything I say with a grain of salt because im no relationship or life expert

as for the deceased parent, be there for them as much as you can, but not at the expense of putting yourself through all this trouble. You should always take everyone seriously when they say they commit, but don’t stay with them just because they say theyre going to if you dont do etc etc. thats unhealthy and manipulative and you shouldn’t have to carry that burden.

i would honestly ask a mental health professional how to move forward, if i were you id end things but who knows im not in your situation and therefore cant fully understand what this circumstance is like nor am i the best descion maker. Its really important that you stay calm and try to build distance from this person.

That person your in a relationship with is going through a hard time, fair, but forcing you to do stuff without your consent? sounds like rape unless i misread or misunderstood something, which is not okay under ANY circumstances.

im sorry your going through this, this is a really stressful and tricky situation. i hope everything works out hun

@activesplooger

would you pooks? /j

AHHHHHHHHH6GNGNGHXCNUUH. CA SO GOOD I HAD A STRONKE HOLY SHIT I LOVE THIS

hello hello!! i come with more art!!!

Yknow rewatching gravity falls makes you realize how batshit insane Ford truly was

1. Lights his face on fire instead of shaving because “it’s faster”

2. Suggests Rudolph should’ve murdered the other reindeer for making fun of him

3. Had a situationship with a triangle