Listening To The Tales Of A 200 Year Old Man

Storm and Wolverine ⛈

Egret Nurse

design from The Wildercourt (a graphic novel I am working on and hope to have finished in 2025)

I struggle thinking about non consensual human experimentation as a whole, but what happened to Bucky really it does just make me sick.

To start, think of how his stomach dropped when he fell from the train, the fucking fear knowing you're dead. You have 2 seconds and then your dead, this is it.

Then you wake up to 1) being alive, horrifically unaware of the 70 years of hell ahead of you and 2) your arm being not only surgically removed but replaced with a metal arm, a foreign body, a parasite. You fight because what else are you ment to do? But you fall unconscious again.

You wake up to days and days of torment and torture and slowly loose hope that it will ever end, that you'll ever be saved. He didn't know that Steve was dead, how long did he yearn for Steve to find him? How mad did he get? Did he punch the wall, did he scream? Did they have to sedate him because of just how psychotic that made him? How fucking manic he would go?

How long till he lost all feeling, all emotion and hope?

When they started putting him in the chair, did he scream and cry? Did he beg for anything else? Any thing, anything, fucking anything. Did he beg for death? Did he feel himself slowly lose all of his memory, did he sob when he first couldn't picture Steve's face, or when he could remember the most important person in the world, but not a name or a background or a face, not a crumb.

The first time he's put in cryo freeze, does he remember his reflection? Seconds before he fell unconscious, never knowing how long it would be before he woke up again. Did he wake up, begging to just be put back in, the closest fate to death he could ever achieve? The closest thing to mercy? Does he catch himself falling asleep at night and wake up in tears, not even sure if it's been 20 minutes of 20 years.

Did his crys for help fall on the shiney leather shoes of scientists who showed no emotion, did he question if he was even human to begin with? Surely a human would be treated with even a fraction of care. No one treated like this was born from a mother, no one treated like this was ever looked at with maternal love.

He stopped feeling like a person, he didn't even remember he was a person. When things seeped though it just hurt, they hurt him, it made it worse. So he stopped it, he wouldn't let himself. It was impossible to live. He had no coping mechanisms, no outlet, he would show any signs of struggle and be hurt for showing humanity. He had to be what they wanted.

Even after he was broken in, no crying anymore. No begging for mercy. Did he spend his nights awake, just TRYING to remember what he forgot, FEELING the missing spots in his mind? Did he hold that metal arm close because he can't even remember how he got it anymore, all he knows is it makes his shoulders ache.

He was completely and utterly trapped, the more he suppressed, even the minor shards he remembered, the more mania he would experience.

Even once he's free, how do you come back from that, even if it was just a mental thing, the physical, real DAMAGE to his brain was enough to make him never heal again. Bucky is a walking fucking miracle and maybe THE survivor.

He is going to have memory problems, severly. He is going to have intense PTSD flashbacks, total hallucination level, breakdowns. Seriously, this level of trauma is NEVER leaving him, not fully. Phantom pains, endless nightmares, coping mechanisms that don't make sense but comfort him none the less.

He's going to have periods of times where he can't even stand being touched, not Steve, not anyone. Weeks where he can't shower or move out of a space his brain has deemed safe for fear of being hurt. Scratches at the seam between his flesh and the metal of arm, wanting it off, wanting it away from him. Again does it necessarily make sense logically? NO!! but does he feel it 100%? Yes!!

He gets better, his bad periods get less intense, more far in between but they never fully go away. As fuckimg depressing as it is, hydra made a permanent mark on his psyche. It's FUCKED.

Gods strongest soldier is Bucky Barnes.

alt designs of Strange Magic (2015) characters Bog King and Marianne

do not separate them!!

Ok but The Bride Of The Frontman would make such a good dark romance. I imagine the marriage being forced on Gi-hun’s part (probably a “marry me and I’ll spare your teammates” situation)

He has Gi-hun wear a white Frontman uniform identical to his own, except instead of a hood, his hair is covered with a veil.

Most of the staff have no idea who this man in white is. Especially since he doesn’t do much besides follow their boss around and get his ass grabbed.

yes like a gothic horror romance type!!! 💖

gihun in a veil yes!! and omg yes that premise 🙏 gihun sacrificing himself in order to save his friends, marrying a man he hates so they will be set free

the workers all referring to him as the bride bc they've never seen his face, since the mask is always obscuring it. they know he's a man, that's semi obvious from his build (and bc the front man uses male pronouns).... and he walks around like a ghost, haunting the island and the games, never talking but always watching, so the workers get lowkey freaked out when they see him at the front man's left side.

also, omg i need to know if someone sees the vision... this but in white, the belt as well and it isn't a full dress to the bottom, the skirts part at the middle and he is wearing white pants underneath....

and then @unintelligiblezombienoises's fantastic outfit here is for when they are getting nasty in the bedroom and no one else can see gihun like that bc inho is possessive 😌

lovestruck .ᐟ 🩷🩵

The Ghoul from Fallout. Absolutely loved his character and had to paint a scene.

Doodle of the pookie