Zeus

The most unhinged s3 reveal for the alice=armand theory would be if alice exists as a completely separate character but she's played by assad zaman in a dollar store wig

“we can’t be together, my love. for i am cursed to be a basketball dracula forever” said basketball dracula as he leapt into a solemn slam dunk from half court. his lover cried immediately

*goes up to a polyamorous triad* so which one of you unspools the thread of fate, which one measures it, and which one cuts it?

you know in retrospect it's weird that the splatooniverse has a band called "the squid sisters" when, like... they Are squids. that's like if the real world had a band called "the human league"

I still think the single funniest thing about the cybertruck is that it has all those security cameras built in that are set to activate if anyone gets too close to the vehicle...and those cameras need electricity to run, and the cybertruck is a piece of shit that has way less battery life than you'd think, so you can legit just fuck over the owner by just standing near it and doing nothing else.

Like goddamn Elongated Muskrat found a way to let us siphon gas out of a car without even touching it. Fucking incredible.

Happy Ides of March!!

Inflation is so fucking bad we're fantasizing about stalkers leaving groceries

when people are like “the hunger games just stole the plot of battle royale” like listen everything steals from the plot of everything the lion king is just furry hamlet westworld is jurassic park but sexier lost is edgy gilligan’s island there are no original stories and the only good piece of media is jennifer’s body