I Aspire To Write A Book That Makes People Stare At The Cover And Hold It Reverently For A Solid Ten

Writing advice you're not going to like.

People sometimes send me Asks wanting writing advice.  I suck at it.  I don’t really know how I do the writing, or how one should do the writing, or what one should do to get better at the writing.  All I can ever think to say is “write a lot of stuff and you will get better at the writing.”  Which is true, but hardly a bolt from the sky.

Well, as it turns out, I do have one piece of Legit Writing Advice, and I am going to share it with you, right now.  If you were in any of my writing workshop groups at a con, you’ve heard this advice already.

Warning: you’re going to fucking hate it.  But if you do it, you will thank me.

If you have a piece of fiction you’re serious about, something you might want to actually shop around, or just something you really are into and want to make it as good as you can…do NOT edit it.

Repeat.  DO NOT EDIT.

REWRITE.

As in, print out the whole fucking thing and re-enter it, every word (or use two screens).  Retype the whole thing.  Recreate it from the ground up using your first draft as a template.  Start with a blank page and re-enter every. single. word.

I hear you screaming.  OH MY GOD THAT’S INSANE.

Yes.  Yes, it is.

It is also the most powerful thing you will ever do for a piece of fiction that you are serious about.

Now, let’s get real.  I don’t do this for most things.  I don’t do it for my fanfiction.  But if it’s something original, something I might like to get to a professional level - I do it.  You absolutely COULD do it for fanfiction.  It’s just up to you and how much time you want to sink into a piece.

You can edit, sure.  But you WILL NOT get down to the level of change that needs to happen in a second draft.  You will let things slide.  Your eyes will miss things.  You will say “eh, good enough.”

The first time I did this, on someone else’s advice, I was dubious.  Within two pages, I was saying WHY HAVE I NOT BEEN DOING THIS ALL THE TIME.  I was amazed at how much change was happening.  By the time I got to the end, I had an entirely different novel than the one I’d started with.  When you’re already re-entering every single word, it’s easy to make deep changes.  You’ll reformat sentences, you’ll switch phrases around, you’ll massage your word choice.  You’ll discover whole paragraphs that don’t need to be there at all because they became redundant.  You’ll find dialogue exchanges that need reimagining.  Whole plot points will suddenly be different, whole story arcs will reveal their flaws and get re-drawn.

You cannot get down to the fundamental level of change that’s required just by editing an existing document.  You have to rebuild it if you really want your story to evolve.  You will be AMAZED at the difference it will make.

It will take time.  It will seem like a huge, Herculean task.  I’m not saying it’s easy.  It isn’t.  But it is absolutely revolutionary.

Try it.  I promise, you will see what I mean.

*PSA: Tipsy!Lori wrote this post.  In case you couldn’t tell.

Advice on Writing Banter

1. Don’t prolong the humor

As a reader, you’ve most likely seen this happen before. It happens when an author takes it upon themselves to make absolutely sure you understand that a character said something funny. This breaks the widely accepted First Commandment of Humor: if you have to explain a joke, said joke loses some of its humor. (Unless explaining the joke would make the scene funnier, etc. in which case you should keep that in! There's always more than one exception to a rule.) When this happens, the scene often slows down--way too much--and the humor quickly fades into annoyance for the reader. Yeah, the joke was fun at first, but it’s pretty much fulfilled its maximum humor.

How can you avoid this? As a reader, remember that you never want the author to patronize you. As a writer, just trust your readers. Tell a joke and just let it stand. Trust that the reader will notice. Don’t drag it out longer than necessary: that kills all the pacing and humor of the scene.

2. Diversify the delivery

Everyone has their own way of telling jokes and reacting to jokes told by others. Some people tell jokes with a deadpan, almost serious delivery. Others can barely get through a joke without laughing to the point of tears. Whatever the case may be, no two people will be the same!

Another way to write good banter is to mix up the types of humor present.  For example, if one of your characters responds to everything with a sarcastic quip, don’t make the rest of your characters aggressively caustic towards one another. 

Also, try mixing up what forms of comedy each character uses. Have a character laugh exclusively at bad puns and nothing else. Maybe another character takes themself way too seriously and refuses to find any humor in ridiculous situations. Or maybe a character can’t tell a knock-knock joke to save their life. Plus, a bonus of diversifying the comedy you use in your banter is that it’s a great way to flesh out your characters!

3. Pacing

The best way to create natural dialogue is make sure it sounds natural, and one way to check that is to look at the pacing. If the banter sounds stilted and awkward, no one is going to laugh. As you read it, listen for awkward pauses or lulls in the dialogue that might slow it down. Sometimes, you should ask yourself: do the responses sound realistic? Because let’s be honest: when you’re bantering with someone, you usually don’t have much time to think of very clever and specific comebacks on the spot. (Actually, I usually find that I come up with said comebacks hours later, when it’s way too late to use them.) I choose to only apply this rule to awkward or forced-sounding dialogue, though. As a banter lover, I never limit myself in writing banter! If I don't like how it sounds later, I can always cut it. I encourage you to do the same. If writing banter makes you happy, then write as much as you want and don't let me tell you what to do!

4. Tone

True banter should always be lighthearted or mischievous, but it should never be malicious or one-sided. There’s a thin line between bantering and bickering, in my opinion. Banter is a teasing, fun, and lighthearted argument between people. Bickering is banter but with often malicious undertones, and it may be one-sided. 

For example, Banter would not be Character A pointing out all of Character B’s flaws. Banter would be A “criticizing” B clearly as a joke, and B defending themselves good-naturedly!

the sheer offensiveness of rereading something you wrote, discovering that, hey, it’s actually pretty good, and then reaching the end, wherein you realize that if you want more you actually have to write it

local public library fandom

can someone explain the alignment chart for me but in like, the simplest wording possible lmao

I wish people’s WIPs showed up on Goodreads because I have seen so many excerpts and WIP intros on Instagram that I NEED to read, but I can’t add them to my TBR so that I can remember I need to read them and I think that is awful.

My writing advice for new writers

masterlist. main navigation.

@bluebxlle_writer on Instagram

1. Write for yourself

This is the #1 tip I will always give to writers, so you've probably heard me say this a few times. Don't write for others, but write for yourself.

People have different tastes. There will always be some who dislike your book, and some who consider it their favorite. Lots of people hate famous books like Percy Jackson or Six Of Crows, and I'm sure you've disliked a popular book before. So instead of writing a book that others would read, start writing a book that you would read. If you end up liking your book, I can assure you that many others will too.

2. Flesh out characters

When you're excited to write a new WIP, you might delay your character building process and decide to start writing while trying to figure out the characterization on the way. I've done this a couple of times, thinking that it would speed up my writing process, but trust me, it did not. It actually slowed down my writing instead.

If you start writing your wip without at least finishing 80% of your character building process, you'll find yourself getting stuck in scenes, not knowing what your character would say or do, which is very inconvenient.

If you ever get bored of character building and really want to start writing instead, I suggest writing one-shots unrelated to your WIP. By doing this, you don't have to worry about writing your characters out of character, and its actually useful to their characterization process.

3. Experiment!

If you feel like there's something off with your writing, or you're beginning to feel that writing is a chore for you, experiment with different writing techniques. Switch up your genre, time period, plotting method, etc.

For reference, I used to be a pantser who writes plot-driven mystery stories. But now, I'm more comfortable with being a plantser who writes character-driven low fantasy stories! Basically, don't be afraid of change, because it might help you later.

4. Know your ending

In my opinion, the most important thing to consider while writing a story is your ending - not your beginning or middle. You can rewrite your beginning chapters anytime, and you can always figure out your middle chapters later, noone knows how to write the middle of a story anyway.

But if you don't know the ending of your story, you're screwed, buddy. Without knowing how your story ends, you can't write the events that build up to that ending.

You're unsure about your novel's ending at first and decided to throw in a last minute plot twist? That means you've been foreshadowing the wrong ending the whole book, and you gotta rewrite. You don't know how your characters will develop throughout the book? You won't be able to write the journey of their arc throughout the story. Hassling, right? That's why, try not to start writing your WIP without having a possible ending in mind.

5. If you write, you're valid.

Nowadays, the standards of being a writer is that you have to write a full-length novel and be traditionally published. This isn't true, not even the slightest.

You write poetry? You're a writer and valid. You're a screenwriter? Bro, look at the word. ScreenWRITER. valid. You write fanfictions? Valid, and you're not cringey. You have NO idea how much I worship fanfiction writers for writing what canon won't give us. You're writing but don't want to be published? You're still valid. As long as you write, you're valid, because that's the whole point of being a writer.

6. Don't follow every single tip

There's a reason why they're called writing tips, not rules. You're not meant to follow every single one of them, they're only meant to guide you on the way. Some will be useful, some won't, depending on yourself. So please, don't be pressured to follow every writing tip you see.

shoutout to all the people who write contemporary, romance, mystery, crime, thriller, horror, paranormal, dystopia, nonfiction, and any other genres I’m forgetting! i know you guys don't get as much attention as fantasy or sci-fi in the writing community, but you're just as valuable and talented, and i appreciate all of you!

Douglas Adams is the best when it comes to describe characters

You see, the problem with writing is that it is always easier to just lie facedown on the floor and make incoherent noises.