I Read CS Lewis’ A Grief Observed One Time Years Ago And I’m Still Not Recovered From It

The heather in bloom

TC tag game Thank you for the questions and for tagging me @renaultphile Rules: Answer the questions and tag other TC fans

"He would not fucking say that" only they did and it's canon. When/who?

I don’t think I’ve read it enough to have a sense of something like this. I really disliked Laurie’s scenes with Adrian though. So it’s not so much ‘he wouldn’t say that’ as ‘I would prefer to ignore the fact that he said/did that.'

2. Did they kiss in the study? Yes/no + why you are 100% correct about this.

I think they did. The first time I read it, I didn't really wonder if something had happened, only what had happened: I didn’t know if they’d only kissed or done anything more. Later, it seemed to be confirmed by Ralph’s letter that they’d not done ‘anything more,’ I just assumed it was a kiss, and I don’t really think the dialogue following the ellipses makes much sense without anything having happened. “Now you see what I mean, Spud. It would never have done, would it? Well, goodbye.” What could Laurie have seen if there was nothing besides a hug or handshake or something? What would never have done? Why ask him to ‘come here’ at all?

3. Mandatory question about Ralph's alleged tattoos.

I really don’t think he’d have any, but if he did I think it'd probably be something nautical.

4. 53 vs 59 edition: quote a line or paragraph that is better in the edition you like the least.

I don’t know which of them I read and I definitely haven’t read another addition, so I can’t answer this. Apparently, the earlier one had more detail and dialogue, so if I haven’t I’d love to read it

5. Which TC character would feel right at home here on tumblr dot com?

Sandy, I think he'd be great on here.

6. Tag yourself at Alec's birthday party.

Laurie reading a book or Laurie just at the beginning, sitting around awkwardly, listening to people’s conversations and wondering how on earth he ended up there.

7. Post a TC meme

The first I ever saw (on the Mary Renault tag) and still the funniest to me, I think because I understand it perfectly

8. Easy to talk about who deserved better. Who deserved worse?

Straike, I hate him with a fiery passion. The man had a dog put down, not because he was sick or anything but simply because he couldn’t be bothered to care for him. Vicar? Ridiculous.

9. You can break the fourth wall (at any point in the novel) and say a single sentence to our protagonist, Laurie Odell. What do you say?

'This is not Ancient Greece, stop being weird,' at the exact moment Andrew is telling him his traumatic life-story and Laurie is preoccupied worrying about Dave. Also related to the question, but not really asked for: if I could I’d also tell Andrew he doesn’t have to feel ashamed of how he feels about Laurie. Well, more accurately, I’d give him a modern copy of ‘Quaker Faith & Practice’ and have the relevant passages highlighted, so I know he won’t miss them. It makes me very sad for both Andrew and Dave that their whole lives could've been very different (and much happier) if they were born four or five generations later.

9. What's a question you have about TC? One you haven't found an answer for yet.

I can't think of any, besides wondering how Mary Renault could've written it because it's so good. I love the use of subtext, the way she describes emotions you've felt before but never would've been able to put into words on your own. In terms of characters and story, I do have a random question about Bunny: was it supposed to be implied that he was a perpetrator of sexual assault? I got that idea when I was reading the car scene between him and Laurie but I was unsure.

I don't know who to tag! I think all of the Charioteer accounts I know have already been tagged, but if anyone hasn't and wants to, I'd love to read your response!

I don’t have links but I really want to talk about The Last Hours because I’m so excited, so I’m just gonna ramble??

The theory I heard that makes a lot of sense to me is that the baby Sona is currently pregnant with will be raised by Alastair. This would explain how Alastair had a child (despite claiming he’d never marry) and is the great-grandfather of Emma Carstairs according to the family tree. It would also explain why the third Carstairs child is nowhere to be found on the family tree itself; since CC has claimed that it’s been purposefully altered, perhaps this is one of the alterations -- Sona had a baby, for some reason could not take care of that child, and so they were taken in by Alastair and raised as his. This is a sad theory though, because Sona is lovely and I don’t want anything to happen to her at all :( 

I am really hoping there will be a very close relationship that will develop between Jem and Alastair and I base it on this one point, in Forever Fallen, where Jem mentions a specific cradle, which he’d personally seen carved over 100 years earlier at Cirenworth ---

“The cradle had been carved more than a hundred years ago from an oak felled in these woods. Jem had seen it made, with careful hands and patient love.”

He doesn’t mention who carved it by name, but Cirenworth has only been owned by the Carstairs since 1895. It was bought by Elias Carstairs, years after Jem had become a Silent Brother, so the only way this passage could make sense is if he’d seen either Elias, Alastair or a child of either of the two build the cradle. 

Now, he can’t have seen Elias, because it’s known and pretty much canon that Elias refused to allow Jem to visit or be near his family whatsoever. It can only either be Alastair or someone directly after Alastair, which means Alastair must’ve had a close enough relationship with Jem if he’s just let him casually show up for a day of woodworking or to be close enough to his child that he’d be there if his child were the one doing it.

So, there is a baby; there is a cradle built by either Alastair for a child or a child of Alastair that Jem would’ve seen at Cirenworth.

I don’t know if this makes no sense but I just wanted to write it all out. I’m really excited!

I’m looking to go down the rabbit hole of theories for Chain of Iron and Chain of Thorns from The Last Hours trilogy. If anyone wants to comment, or link me to any of the theories, I would be much appreciated.

i recently started reading the Well of Loneliness which is one of the books that Mary was responding to in her contemporary novels that include gay characters. i had previously just heard about it as basically this very depressing classic of gay literature that was very controversial, banned in England, etc., but i really had no idea of its literary merit, if it was actually a good book or not! i'm like 3/4 way through and i HAVE to recommend it. it's really compelling and i found it very affecting. it addresses a lot of the themes that appear in the Charioteer about the dilemma of gay life at the time, a lot of the main character's thoughts are quite reminiscent of Laurie's thoughts. i think it's a classic for a reason and worth reading.

I will definitely check this out! If it's reminiscent of Laurie, I'll probably love it! Thank you so much for the recommendation!

Always really funny when I read a book where I relate to the main character, really see myself in them and understand their pain completely, and the reviews and comments are all "what an insufferable whiny bitch, i can't stand them"

At the end of The Charioteer, Laurie lies to Ralph but feels the lie as if it's true. There's something that must be done, and only he can do it. He accepts this, even if he lies in order to achieve it.

Before, Ralph told Laurie he hates to stand by watching while there's pain or the possibility of it, and do nothing. It's not the way he's made, he says. This is a direct contrast to Andrew, who we see literally standing, watching and doing nothing when caring for Charlot. This is not because Andrew is unkind, it is because there is right and wrong and nothing whatever in between. Ralph is not like this: people need someone, he takes on that responsibility, even if it isn't his to shoulder. He acts like God, they say. He's the opposite of Andrew in this regard. Maybe the point is that Laurie isn't like Andrew either, although he loves him. It's also not in his nature to stand and watch people suffer; this is why he felt something ought to be done in school when Ralph was being kicked out, and why he feels it at the end of the book when he realizes what Ralph is planning to do. It's why he feels the pressing demand to deceive Charlot even as he knows that, in his right mind, the man would never want it. I got the sense the first time I read the book and now the second, that Laurie is much more generally suited to Ralph, and this is why.

I don't know if this makes sense, I've not gotten much sleep. Any thoughts? Do you think this is right, wrong? Am I overthinking it?

Tess of the D’Urbervilles (1998)

Gideon: Sophie and I are having a baby.

Alastair: That's gre--

Gideon, slamming adoption papers on the table: It's you, sign here.

The Andrew description is so so similar to the Ralph one. Fair hair and tanned skin obviously but there are so many details, he's even wearing grey like the school uniform. A proper post will follow but in the meantime omG