OH MY GOD YES

And then he died

Sorry there’s like no plot I worked on this for 18 hours and wasn’t thinking at any point

before I actually sleep should we indulge in Mendel/Marvin Monday

on another note do either of them actually deserve a monday?

discuss.

Falsettos Incorrect Quotes! (p.1)

[Also, deeply sorry about coming back with another random musical hyperfixation. I'll try to get motivated to finish up the DEH series!] - Whizzer: Can you come out? Marvin: Yeah, just one second. Marvin: Whiz, I'm gay. Whizzer: I know that. Come out to the car. Marvin: Okay. Marvin: Car, I'm gay. - Whizzer: We're playing Scrabble. It's a nightmare. Jason: Scrabble? Scrabble's great. Whizzer: Not when you're playing with Marvin, it's not. He puts down words like "ephemeral" and I put down "dog." - Mendel: Bonjour, Trina. Voules-vous coucher avec moi? Trina, unfazed: No, I do not want to sleep with you. Mendel: Oh, man, is that what that means? I had a really gross tennis instructor. - Whizzer: Don't worry, I have a permit. Charlotte: ..This just says "I can do what I want." - Marvin: Trina, do it for our friendship- you can't put a price on that! Trina: Yes, I can, dear. Fifty dollars. - Jason: I've never once smoked marijuana. I ate a brownie once at a party. It was intense. It was kind of indescribable. I felt like I was floating. Turns out, there was no pot in the brownie... it was just an insanely good brownie. - Marvin: Can you name a single city in Oklahoma? Whizzer: Oklahoma City, bitch! - Marvin: Being gay is a constant struggle between "I wish to sit on a window bench with my lover, our legs entangled as we listen to the birds", and "Hey, let's go throw rocks at fascists" and I think that's very sexy of us. Whizzer: If the window's open and you time it correctly, you can do both. - Mendel: Okay, is anyone in this room actually straight? Marvin: *Raises his hand* Whizzer: *Puts Marvin's hand down* - Cordelia: You know what I've realized? Marvin: Some thoughts are better left unsaid? Cordelia: Nice try, anyways- - Jason: I think mostly I wanna see what happens when this whole place breaks apart. - Marvin: The next time I open up to somebody, it'll be my autopsy. - Trina: Jase... Jason: I can tell by the tone of your voice that I've disappointed you. Alas, I must further disappoint you by affirming that I do not give a fuck. - Whizzer: New year, same me. Cuz' Im perfect. - Mendel, excited: Heyy! Trina: Hey, someone's excited. Marvin, deadpan: Yeah, and it's making me sick. - Mendel: If I punch myself and it hurts, am I strong or weak? Trina: Strong! Whizzer: Weak. Marvin: An idiot. That's what you are. - Cordelia: Are you alright? Charlotte: Short answer, or long answer? Cordelia: Short? Charlotte: No. Cordelia: Long? Charlotte: Noooooo. - Cordelia: Treat spiders the way you want to be treated! Marvin: Killed without hesitation. - Whizzer: I'm hot, I'm tall, I'm gay, and I'm in my theater kid arc. - Charlotte: Seriously, all you do is bitch. Marvin: I happen to bitch the perfect amount for someone in my situation. - Trina: Unfortunately, due to several experiences in my youth, I cannot just 'walk up and join a circle of people talking', but it does sound lovely, thank you. - Trina, answering the phone: Hello? Jason: It's Jason. Trina: What did he do this time? Jason: No, it's me, Jason. It's actually me. Trina: What did you do this time? - Marvin: I saw Whizzer for the first time in years.. Jason: And? Marvin: I told him I was an Olympic gymnast. Jason: What? Why?? Marvin: You know when you get nervous, and you end up lying to impress? Jason: ..No. Marvin: Exactly, we've all done it. - Cordelia: My knee just cracked so loudly that I half-expected it to glow in the dark tonight- - Marvin: You know, when I first met you, I thought you were a real bitch. Whizzer: What changed your mind? Marvin: Oh, I still think your a bitch, I've just grown to like that about you. - Marvin: Would I rather be feared, or loved? Easy. Both. I want people to fear how much they love me.

It's Quote Time Again (P- pt. 10? I think?Dk)

-

Jared: Do you consider me your friend?

Evan: Uh, yeah. What else would you be?

Jared: I don't know. An embarrassment? A way to rebel against Hedi? A desperate cry for help? The list is endless.

-

Zoe: Oh my god, Evan! Those pants look great! And I bet they would look even better on Jared's floor!

Jared: Did

Jared: Did you just hit on Evan... for me???

-

Connor: I'm thinking of a number-

Zoe: 420.

Connor: No, that's so fucking immature of you. Someone else guess.

Jared: 69.

Zoe: He literally just said-

Connor: Yeah, it was 69.

-

Evan: Mom, do you know anything about emails? Specifically how to fake them?

Heidi: Emails? Evan, what is this for?

Evan: . . .

Evan: Fun

-

Alana: Do you want to talk about it?

Jared: No, I just want to cry and watch memes.

-

Zoe: I had a dream that we got in a huge fight.

Connor: Who won?

Zoe: Me.

Connor: Yup. Definitely a dream.

-

Mark: We got a divorce.

Heidi: No, we messed up a perfectly good son. Look at it, it's got anxiety.

-

Alana: What does BDSM mean?

Jared: Being Dead Sounds Magnificent.

-

Alana: Why are people so caught up in top or bottom? Honestly, I would be super happy just to have a bunk bed!

Connor:

Evan:

Zoe:

Jared: I'm gonna tell her.

Zoe: Don't you dare

-

Evan: When was the last time you ate?

Jared: Food is a social construct created and perpetuated by large scale agricultural interests.

Evan: It's... it's really not.

-

Connor: It's hard to be the gay cousin, the emo cousin, and the family failure, but someone's gotta do it.

-

Alana: You should really get over Evan, Jared.

Jared: I'd rather get him under me.

Alana:

Alana: Touché.

-

Zoe: I dare you to kiss the next person that walks in the room.

Connor: Eh, no. That's stupid.

Miguel: *Walks in* Hey, anything cool happening in here?

Connor: Okay, well maybe I'll do it. Rules are rules, y'know...

-

Evan: Have you ever had a partner?

Jared: Nah.

Evan: Wha- how?!

Jared: *Shrugs* I dunno, never asked, never got asked.

Evan: *Under his breathe* But your kinda really hot though..

Jared: What?

Evan: What?

-

Jared: I fucked up. I fucked up,

Evan: Why? What happened?

Jared: I fucking fell for someone.

Evan: Damn. Must be someone really special for The Insanely Heartless and Cold Jared Kleinman to fall for them.

Jared, glaring at Evan: Yeah. Real special.

-

Connor: Miguel is out of town, I'm cutting off all of my shirt sleeves.

Alana: ...Why?

Connor: He's pretty much, like, %90 of my impulse control.

-

*SQUIPed Jared AU bcz I felt like it*

J's SQUIP: Straighten your back.

Jared: My back will be as gay as I want it to, fuck you.

-

Evan: Kiss, marry, kill: Me, Connor, Alana

Jared: Kiss Alana, marry you, kill Zoe.

Zoe: I wasn't even on the list, what the hell?

-

Zoe: Settle a bet, what day is it?

Jared: Friday?

Zoe: Well, well, well, looks like none of us got it right. This idiot thought it was Tuesday. *Looks at Connor*

-

Evan: I look back on being 17 and think:

Evan: "Oh my god, how did I not die?"

-

Evan: Why would you give Connor a knife?

Zoe, the tired younger but more mature sibling: He felt unsafe.

Evan: Well, now we feel unsafe! *Points to himself and Jared*

Zoe: I'm sorry,

Zoe: Do you want a knife?

-

Connor: My life is a little too much panic and not enough disco.

Evan: My life is a little too much fall and not enough boy.

Jared: My life is a little too much chemical and not enough romance.

Alana: My life is a little too much imagine and not NEARLY enough dragons.

-

Novel Evan: Okay! Step one of being popular: Be straight.

Novel Jared: *Exists*

Novel Evan, bi panicking: Okay! Failed step one!

-

Alana: When I was small-

Jared: *Snorts*

Jared: "was"

(He likes to feel tall)

-

Novel Evan: I'm pretty good at hiding crushes!

Novel Jared: *Walks in*

Novel Evan: I have to gay- I mean go

could you perhaps mean our lord and savior christian borle?

what I need in life is an animated movie of Be More Chill with the SQUIP being played by the fine gentleman who voices Vox in Hazbin Hotel

but what if there was a fic for when rick and william move in together in the comic

and what if it was about them going through the stages before an official relationship really bubbles to the surface

and what if they kissed actually ☹️ and what if they went through a year of domesticity before realizing they were basically living as boyfriends anyways and that's why they start dating

and what if-

crazy that when you do something it becomes finished. how was I supposed to know that

you edit my willrick insanity I'll edit yours

do we have a deal 👁️👄👁️

so many invincible authors on ao3 kill off rick to push canon william and literally any mark variant together but consider

what if a mark variant tried to take william and rick killed the variant?

is this something?? it's one of those shower thoughts you're not fully sure about but you gotta see if anyone agrees just for the hell of it

Sally Face Brainrot

Everyone's reactions to figuring out Travis has no utter idea what Sanitys Fall is

Larry: YOUR KIDDING RIGHT??

Travis: I-- no???

Larry: HERE TAKE THIS MP3 PLAYER AND HEADPHONES AND THESE 17 DIFFERENT CDS AND-

~

Sal: Really? :0

Travis: Uh.. well Larry gave me a bunch of shit to listen to later, so.

Sal: Their baller, man. Can't believe you didn't know bout' them til' now.

Travis: :)

~

Ashley: Honestly man I haven't even listened to that band

Travis: haha

~

Todd: It's all screaming, your little choir boy ears won't be able to handle it.

Travis, rolling his eyes: Gee, thanks brainiac.

~

Neil: I think Sally showed me them before. Their pretty cool, good for you, bud.

Travis: *Thumbs up*

~

Kenneth: That isn't very christian music, Travis

Travis, getting ready to jump out a window: Y E P -

~

Mrs. Phelps: Did your father approve?

Travis, holding his most likely broken nose: so the thing about that is-

finally I hear somebody else speaking of this EHAT IS GOING ON??????? WHY IS THERE A CYCLE

christian borle should play prof. callahan in a remake of legally blonde on broadway and his emmett should one day play marvin on a falsettos revival to keep the cycle of marvins playing callahan