Woman To Woman

be addicted to real dopamine

be in the present and notice those little things you never saw before, but that have always been there

experience new exciting things that bring you joy

love people, listen to them and create meaningful connections

make art and don’t label it as “good” or “bad,” just let your soul be free

stop scrolling on social media and start turning pages of an interesting book

do mindfulness meditation and feel your body and mind calming down

move your body, no matter how as long as you’re enjoying

listen to music that matches the moment you’re in

eat nourishing food, feel your stomach full without discomfort

get a good night of sleep and feel yourself ready for another day

STOP Being His “Spoiled” Girlfriend

HOW TO RECEIVE GF TREATMENT WITHOUT COMMITMENT!

“My man, my man, my man,”

You’re not spoiled being on standby when you want to be secured, sorry. It cancels out.

Here’s why you’re still a placeholder even though you’re being spoiled by the most generous boyfriend in the world:

You’re giving up the cat (with excitement bc he’s “spoiling you). I can stop here.

You’ve claimed commitment in exchange for his companionship (and coins). This means you’ve loss the leverage of having him chase and most likely don’t care to make him chase

Most of y’all are receiving gifts, not investments (purses not properties)

The strategy of “Beneficiary Dating” allows you to receive both gifts and investments from suitors without being on standby for a ring (or to bend over)

Here’s how you can receive Girlfriend Treatment WITHOUT becoming anyone’s girlfriend:

Commit to celibacy, please

Keep them at a physical and emotional distance. Y’all We can’t WAIT to pillow talk about our traumas and past relationships. Detachment please

Have the goal of marriage without rushing to get married

Become the girl they beg for commitment, even if you know you’re going to always say no.

There’s a psychological allure of perusing something that is not accessible. Or someone that’s not accessible- you.

You’re inaccessible for commitment without a masculine making you the beneficiary for their life insurance plan. I don’t make the rules!

First comes investment, then comes intimacy

Click to learn how to “Beneficiary Date”

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where to start

introduction:

self-improvement looks very simple on paper. eat better, workout, have a skin care and hair care routine. lower your screentime, study, be organized, have hobbies. but trust me i know how difficult it is to actually DO the things you talk about doing. how hard it is to even know where to start, and how to stay consistent. roadblocks also happen, things out of your control. but ultimately you can make change in your life, just little by little.

planning:

during this stage you need to think of what you want to accomplish and creating an action plan full of steps that can get you there. i've provided my own example too :)

prioritize your physical and mental health. when those things are improving then pretty much everything else in your life will start to follow. just look at yourself now and think 'what can i do better? how can i be happier & healthier?'

write down your goals.

create an action plan for each goal. what steps can you take to achieve this goal? make a step by step plan.

come up with things you can do everyday to reach that goal. what adjustments can you make in your everyday routine that'll help you get there? for example, i want to make an etsy shop so i sew for 20+ minutes a day on weekends, and sew 30 minutes on weekdays.

excecuting:

the most important part is slowly easing into your new habits. look at your goals and think 'what steps am i taking to reach it?'

meeting your basic needs. before you even think about self improvement make sure you're taking care of your health and hygeine. this means eating enough, being hydrated, taking care of your hygeine. always make sure that your core needsre met consistently before you even begin.

start small. once you've gotten consistent with meeting your basic needs then start making small changes. (ex. exercising for 10 minutes, reading for 10 minutes, start small with the habits you planned) dont overwhelm yourself!

have a fluid plan. be open to change- if something really isn't working then adjust it! and, when you continue to do something for a while, start doing it longer- i used to walk around 1.5 miles daily for almost a month and then started doing 2.5. keep increasing until you're at a healthy point.

having a good mindset. as always make sure your mindset is good. remember that progress isn't linear- you're going to screw up sometimes and get off track. just make sure you learn from every experience.

conclusion:

no matter what there ARE going to be problems or things that don't go your way, things that aren't in your control. since my 15th birthday i've been applying to jobs left and right, over 30 or so, and it's been 5 months of rejection due to my age (15 year olds can only work 3 hours in a row and most places need more). since i can't control that i just keep applying and in the mean time i focus on the other aspects of my life! it can be really frustrating but you just have to keep pushing.

HOW TO BEGIN HEALING

ACKNOWLEDGE THE PAIN AND DAMAGE. Others will try frequently to avoid these feelings and the thought that they’re hurt or hurting. However, it is a massive roadblock to starting your journey. 

You have to truly confront yourself. Journal, vent to someone, draw or however you feel is best to truly express how you feel, you do. 

EXTRACT TRIGGERS. Don’t let your physical environment encourage triggers that resurface your hurt self or continue to hurt you. E.g. friends, social media, family, bad habits etc. 

DAILY REFLECTION. You have to start to confront your feelings and experiences, but I know, it’s scary and we don’t want to revisit bad times. Please try to do some self-reflection daily about personal feelings and experiences, as it gets easier when it’s so frequent. 

ESTABLISH ORDER & ROUTINES. Start putting in good habits in your life and slowly improve your mental and physical well-being. Healing is going to be all over the place and messy. So when we have a routine to fall back on when needed, it just makes us feel better. 

ACTUAL SELF-CARE. Everything showers and face masks are nice and all, but they are not the only aspects of self-care. Self-care is doing the things that are good for you, disregarding how you currently feel. E.g. cooking and eating a healthy breakfast instead of eating takeout. 

BE PATIENT AND PERSISTENT. Healing is going to be hard regardless of what hurt you. There will be days when you feel like giving up. However, I encourage you to fight those feelings of hopelessness and continue. 

REMOVE SHAME FROM YOUR MIND. Another roadblock, it limits you from all the help and lessons you get in life. It isolates you, from everybody else who does care about you and wants to help. Asking for anything is not embarrassing. 

RECONNECT WITH YOURSELF. Start doing hobbies that you love, learning about things you’ve been curious about, and reading books on your favourite topics. Reconnection is so important because it brings emotional and mental prosperity. 

building my rebrand

getting my money right

one of my main goals right now is to get my money right and save as much as i can. here are some things i am focusing on:

getting a job with lots of opportunity for growth

picking up as many shifts as i can

trying savings challenges on pay days

spread out spending on wants; want something for at least 2 weeks before considering buying

meal plan and buy groceries for those meals rather than buying random things

fill gas tank full when possible rather than filling a little at a time

sleep schedule

my sleep schedule has been off for a little while now due to stress and sickness, so i am focusing on going to sleep at a reasonable hour and around the same time every night and waking up at a reasonable hour and around the same time every morning.

healthy body, healthy mind

taking care of the physical body helps not only your physical health and wellness, but the mental as well. here are some ways i am working to take better care of my body:

some form of exercise per day, even if it’s just stretching

stay mindful of the nutrients in your food, including vitamins, protein, sugar, and fat

stay mindful of water intake and try to drink as much as possible

when sitting or lying down, do not stay in one position for too long. shift and move around regularly.

taking care of your looks

while this may be a bit controversial, it’s important to take care of your appearance, even if it’s in your own way. not only will you make a good impression on others, but you will feel more positive and confident about yourself. some ways i am doing this are:

researching good skincare products and staying consistent with a skincare routine

hair oiling at least once a week

avoid super oily or sugary foods

again, stay hydrated!

strength training and cardio

if you wear makeup, make an effort to find the best style for your face shape

know your body shape and undertones and how to dress accordingly

mindset

arguably the most important part! your mindset is everything, as having a negative mindset can ruin even the best experiences for you. constantly reminding yourself of your power and worth among other things is crucial for everything else to fall into place.

NARCISSUS; self-infatuation — a guide

“ Narcissistic, my god i love it “ – IVE, Love Dive

one thing us girls are told is to ‘love ourselves’, but how do you do that ? this is a starter guide to help you start on this ‘self love’ journey–

💋 be gentle, but strict with yourself ! sometimes, the voice in your head has to be your own big sis. working on/ practicing discipline will allow you to develop a kind of respect for yourself, which in turn, will help you be kinder to yourself when it comes to developing yourself as a person.

💋 ignore outside negative opinions ! the person sitting in the same room as you, their opinion doesn’t matter. why ? will they be there at your deathbed while you recollect your life choices ? ignore them, this is your life, and your path, your opinion matters more than anyone else's. be kinder to yourself please–

💋 shamelessly you ! show off the best parts of your personality to the world, we love it ! i like to see imperfect smiles and odd laughter, goofy actions that make onlookers go “wow, she may be weird, but if i had that confidence, i would do the same !” the biggest inspiration for me, has been random people who are being themselves so shamelessly, that they automatically gain my respect, be her !

💋 establish your style now ! a lot of us like to wait until we have accomplished something to show our true style. for example, many girls think “when i lose this much weight, i’ll start dressing the way i want !” stop that line of thinking. i get that using that as a reward system can be motivating, but it will also make you dissatisfied with your present self. presenting your style now, not only helps you understand what you like at a faster rate, but it will give the people around you plenty of time to get used to the real you (before you reach your goals).

💋 establish your mindset ! how do you think ? what’s your philosophy of the world around you ? understanding factors like that will help you with paving your future. follow opportunities (finding your desired career,desired friends, desired school, desired place to live, etc.) that support this mindset, THAT is the true key to happiness !

💋 enjoy the little things ! life has multiple ups and downs. when its good, its good, and when its bad, its bad. But focusing on every bad thing; thats dangerous and not worth your time. other women don’t learn this until they hit their thirties, lets listen and learn from them and enjoy the small things in life.

💋 release your positivity ! when you make people around you smile in your presence, it makes you happy as well. people will see you being so positive, that they will reflect more positivity back onto you like a mirror..

💋 have fun ! letting go every once in a while will give you motivation to continue. having fun will make you enjoy what life has to offer. No matter what position, what country, or what race you are, if you have even the slightest chance to chase the opportunity of fun, why decline ? the world is giving it to you for free !

don’t forget ! during every journey, patience will be your best friend. many of us have burnt bridges with ourselves that we want to rebuild, and luckily for us, we have all the time in the world to understand ourselves, give yourself some time and understanding, she deserves it–

@iluvprettygirls

You Can’t SEDUCE When You Lack STRATEGY

urTOOspoiled Big Sis Series

The main thing I’ve noticed about men is that they ALWAYS date with intention and a play.

This is BOTH from good men and the hobosexuals. They know what they’re doing.

INTENTION: an aim or a plan

PLAY: a report on what is happening in a sports game; plan breakdown

Men NEVER “go with the flow”. They either have ill, self centered (using you as a placeholder/booty call) or mutually beneficial intentions (marriage, FWB etc.).

In addition, they NEVER aimlessly find their way towards their goal. They have a goal and they break down the actions behind the accomplishment.

Sometimes it’s your heart. Sometimes it’s your life insurance plan.

It’s time we, as women, buckle up and have our own agendas lined up.

LAW 4

Always Say Less Than Necessary

I love my ladies but we do indeed pillow talk too much to the men we are dating. We tell them our backstories. We tell them how our exes did us dirty and all they do is sit back and take notes for when it’s their turn to do the same.

ITS TIME WE LIE AND LEAVE OUT INFO.

In addition, stop letting men lead the convo because you’re too intimidated to hold the conversation. It’s your job to get him to spill as much info about himself for you to gather a conclusion about your intentions with him.

LAW 9

Win Through Actions, Never Through Argument

Get it through your thick skull that you’ll never win an argument with a man using your words. Definitely not if you raise your voice.

A lot of women message me stating how they keep “telling” their man how to treat them and I sigh & laugh because I remember when I was that ditzy.

Men are indeed like dogs. You’ll get almost nowhere yelling or repeating yourself to a dog whose insisting on not listening to you (i.e. pulling the leash while you call their name.).

You can let the dog pull you and continue to yell…but where does that get you expect IGNORED and IN DISTRESS?

Put your foot down…and out the door. Just for the love of God stop playing dumb for peen.

LAW 17

Keep Others In Suspended Terror: Cultivate An Air of Unpredictability

“Humans are creatures of habit with an insatiable need to see familiarity in other people’s actions. Your predictability gives them a sense of control. Turn the tables. Be deliberately unpredictable.”

It’s one thing to be mysterious but it’s another to add the razzle dazzle of randomness in the mix. You see, you can predict someone being mysterious- being somewhat reserved or private.

Be unpredictable and have a moment where you’re transparent. Everyone shouldn’t have the same (good) impression of you. Some may view you as serious and laid back while others couldn’t imagine you being nothing other than bubbly. Shake shit up.

Closing Thoughts:

Men have created a culture of sharing the secrets of using women to their advantage. They’re not clueless nor uneducated on how to treat you correctly therefore it’s unproductive to attempt to teach them.

They are simply using the strategy their barber, daddy, coach, teammates and Pastor passed along to them since you (most likely) weren’t taught any better. They have a community-a village that molds them, something women do not have in general.

My goal here is to create community while encouraging young women to use LOGIC when it comes to romance. It’s both for safety and spoiled brat purposes.

september is giving main character. i will stand on business this month when it comes to me. i won’t play about me this month because i KNOW i’m HER! i have a magnetic presence even when I’m not seen. i don’t even have to be in the room for my aura to be sensed. people can’t help but to luv me. i am everyone’s dream girl. of a presidential caliber. i set the standard. exclusive, luxurious, high commodity DOLL.

take care of yourself

𓂃 ﾟ｡🎀 ⋆ ⟡ 𓂃 ﾟ｡🎀 ⋆ ⟡ 𓂃 ﾟ｡🎀 ⋆ ⟡ 𓂃

mentally — journal: do a brain dump · meditate · remove toxic people and triggering things from your life · recite self love affirmations · think happy thoughts · if negative thoughts come, it’s okay, that’s inevitable.. let them be but don’t let them stay · take walks to clear your mind (watch your surroundings-be careful) · block, unfollow, and mute accounts online that make you feel bad about yourself · disconnect from the world - social media - the news etc often in order to make peace your priority, reset and recharge

emotionally — allow yourself to feel whatever it is that you’re feeling : cry - scream -laugh - smile .. let it out · process your feelings, the good and bad ones · try to understand them and try to work your way through them · journal daily · tell people how you feel and how they make you feel because keeping things like this bottled up isn’t good · be kind to yourself · be patient with yourself · know that your feelings are always valid and no one can ever tell you how to feel about something

physically — exercise · try yoga/pilates · drink enough water every day · try to eat breakfast lunch and dinner daily · brush your teeth in the morning and before bed · wash and deep condition your hair · don’t skip your skin care routine · get mani/pedis · practice good hygiene/shower regularly · moisturize your skin · get facials · get enough sleep · use sunscreen

Hobbies to Try in your 20's

Explore art:

Tap into your creative side with painting, drawing, or sculpting. Art is not only therapeutic but also a fantastic way to express yourself and even decorate your space.

Reading:

Join a book club or set a personal reading challenge. From classic literature to modern thrillers, reading can expand your horizons and provide endless inspiration.

Get into gardening:

Whether you have a big backyard or just a small apartment balcony, gardening can be a relaxing and fulfilling hobby.Grow your own herbs, flowers, or vegetables!

Experiment with cooking:

Take on new recipes and cooking techniques. From baking bread to mastering the art of sushi, cooking can be both a practical skill and a creative outlet.

Try photography:

Capture the beauty around you and tell your story through the lens. Experiment with different styles, like portrait or landscape photography, and maybe even start a photo blog.

Practice yoga or meditation:

Incorporate mindfulness into your routine to reduce stress and enhance your overall well-being.

Learn to code:

Dive into the world of programming and build your own apps or websites. Coding is a valuable skill that can open up career opportunities and enhance your problem-solving abilities.

Challenge yourself with puzzles:

Engage your brain with jigsaw puzzles, crosswords, or brain teasers. It's a great way to relax and keep your mind sharp.

Try acting or improv:

Step out of your comfort zone and explore your theatrical side. Acting classes or improv groups can boost your confidence and creativity.

Travel and explore:

If possible, travel to new places, even if it's just a nearby town.Experiencing new cultures and environments can broaden your perspective and inspire new passions.

Try pottery:

Get your hands dirty and create beautiful, functional pieces with pottery. It's a relaxing and creative way to express yourself, and you'll end up with unique, handmade items.

Play games:

Board games,video games, or strategy games can be a great way to unwind and bond with friends.

Learn a new language:

Expand your horizons by learning a new language.It opens up opportunities for travel, cultural exchange, and even new career prospects. Plus, it's a fun and challenging way to keep your brain active.

Start a YouTube Channel or blog:

Share your passions, knowledge, or daily life through videos or written content. It's a creative outlet and a way to connect with like-minded individuals.