Was It Casual When You Shoved Him Off The Cliff And Then Stood Over His Corpse Watching The Warmth And

be aware of what you consume:

the energy of others: surround yourself with positive people and avoid those who drain you.

the videos you watch: select content that inspires, educates or entertains you in a healthy way.

what you read: look for reliable sources and material that enriches you intellectually.

who you follow: follow people who inspire and challenge you to grow.

what you scroll through on social media: avoid negative content and look for something that motivates you or makes you feel good.

the news: look for objective sources of information and avoid information overload.

highlights of others: compare less and celebrate more the achievements of others.

the advice you listen to: evaluate advice according to your criteria and needs.

source: @zamirasaba

I love you for your post about the “I’m just a girl” phenomenon - my eyes cannot roll far back enough into my skull when I hear someone say it in earnest

thank you! i'm so glad people agree with me on this! whenever i've brought it up to people i hear saying this they just argue thats its not that deep, but i think it is that deep!

propaganda a lot of y’all should fall for:

whispering “thanku” to your tea or coffee before the first sip.

telling your friends you love them when they least expect it. especially then.

googling “what kind of flower blooms twice” at 3 a.m. to feel hopeful again

deleting apps every two weeks and calling it a spiritual reset.

naming your plants like they’re ur friends. apologizing when you forget to water them.

believing ur younger self would still think you’re cool. even on your worst days.

using perfume before bed. for no one. for you.

making eye contact with yourself in the mirror when you cry. giving the pain an audience.

taking selfies when you feel awful. proof you existed even when the light wasn’t flattering :-)

i dreamt that he spoke french to comfort me

i dreamt that he spoke french to comfort me

his lilting voice butchering the complex french words he tried to say

making such a beautiful language sound so stilted and choked

there is a metaphor in this

one that i am too lazy to write

i have never understood french

despite years of private school education and ski holidays and a father who is fluent

i remember the words 'trois petit cochon'

i do not remember how they are spelt

i remember the word for condom, the word for london, how to tell someone my age

but if i woke up tommorow in annecy or paris or toulouse

i would be hopelessly, desperately, lost

french people cannot say my name

they do not have the 'th' sound in their language

so my name ends harshly and abruptly

so in this dream he speaks to me in a language that is barred to me

see now that metaphor writes itself

obsessed and horrified with the romanticisation of the secret history. why am i seeing 'dark academia aesthetic' edits with the audiobook opening playing over the top, why am i reading posts about what it would be like to date henry winter (he would not date you, he would not socialise with people outside of the greek class), why are you guys talking about how fun it would be to go to a college like theirs and join a cult class like theirs. youu people are missing the point of the story!! morbid longing for the picturesque!!! you guys misunderstood the book!!!!

the idea that your behind someone implies that you are going the same way, which is inherently wrong because no one is on the same path.

to use an orienteering metaphor (which y'all might not get bc my sport is a niche sport, so message if you want an explanation) if you reach a checkpoint and dib it, and your excited that you're halfway done, and someone else comes up behind you and is excited because this is their second last checkpoint, you aren't behind them, you are just running different courses. it might feel like you are going slower than them, but they are on a different route, they might have set of sooner, the route they are taking might be shorter.

but even if someone on the same course as you overtakes you, you aren't necessarily behind them. they might be better at running, or have more grippy shoes, or be more hydrated.

this also applies for passing others. you're not necessarily better than them, you might be more equipped, they might be lost, they might have taken a different route to avoid slopes because of an injury.

you don't know what help others are getting, you will never know their circumstances. so don't assume you are ever better/worse than anyone.

good habits vs bad habits

So I've been thinking a lot lately about habits and some of the habits we think are helping us are actually making our lives harder. So let's talk about the habits that actually matter, the ones that are obviously terrible (but we do them anyway) and those sneaky habits that look good on paper but are quietly sabotaging your life !

The actually good habits (that don't require a PhD in self-discipline)

Morning Water Before Coffee: ur body just went 8 hours without water it's basically a human raisin. One glass of water before you caffeinate yourself into productivity mode helps everything work better. ur brain, ur skin, ur mood, ur ability to not feel like garbage at 2 PM.

The 10-Minute tidy: set a timer for 10 minutes and just put stuff back where it belongs. Not deep cleaning just returning things to their homes. This prevents the avalanche effect where your space gets so messy that cleaning feels like something impossible clothes back to the closet , that messy book shelf those simple stuff ..

Phone goes to sleep before u do: Put your phone in another room 30 minutes before bed or far from ur bed . ur brain needs time to shift gears from "consuming information" mode to "actually resting" mode. That last scroll through TikTok isn't relaxing you girlie it's like feeding your brain another cup of coffee and wondering why you can't sleep.

The sunday brain dump: spend 15 minutes every sunday writing down everything you need to do that week. brain-to-paper transfer , this stops your Monday brain from spending energy trying to remember what it forgot while also trying to function like a human.

The obviously bad habits ( and we keep doing them anyw)

The snooze button addiction: u are literally training your brain to ignore your own decisions. Every time you hit snooze, you're telling yourself "my word means nothing." Plus that extra 9 minutes of sleep is garbage sleep that makes you feel worse not better .

Stress eating ur feelings: food becomes the solution to boredom, anxiety, celebration, sadness ... . You're not actually hungry you're using food like a drug to change how you feel. The problem is it works for about 10 minutes, then you feel worse AND like sh!t

The comparison scroll: opening Instagram when you're already feeling bad about yourself is like pouring salt on a wound and expecting it to heal faster. You're voluntarily looking at everyone else's highlight reel while sitting in your own behind-the-scenes chaos and u start acting like a victim for the next days cuz u think u are not pretty as x

Saying yes when u mean no: this isn't being nice it's being dishonest y'know you're lying to other people about your capacity and to yourself about your priorities. Every yes to something you don't want is a no to something you do want.

The "good" habits that are actually destroying you

The productivity porn addiction: u spend more time organizing your to-do lists, finding the perfect app, and watching productivity YouTube videos than actually doing things. You've turned productivity into procrastination with extra steps. Your 47 different planning systems aren't making you more efficient they're making you feel busy while accomplishing nothing.

The morning routine obsession: You've created a 2-hour morning routine that requires waking up at 4 AM, journaling, meditating, working out, reading, making a green smoothie. One day you sleep in and the whole thing crumbles. Now you feel like a failure because you didn't do your 39 -step morning ritual (bruh 💀). A good morning routine should make your life easier, not turn you into a slave to your own schedule.

The Information overload trap: You're subscribed to 47 newsletters, follow 23 self-improvement podcasts, and have 12 books about habits on your nightstand. You think consuming information about improvement IS improvement no it's not. You're using learning as a way to avoid doing. Knowledge without action is just expensive entertainment .

The perfectionist planning: u spend three hours planning a workout routine that's so detailed and perfect that you never actually start it. You research the optimal time, the best exercises, the perfect playlist, the ideal pre-workout snack. Meanwhile you could have just gone for a walk. The perfect plan you never follow is worse than the imperfect plan you actually do.

The self-care performance: You've turned self-care into another item on your to-do list. Face masks on Sunday, meditation app every morning, gratitude journal every night. But you're doing it because you think you should, not because it actually makes you feel better. Real self-care might be saying no to plans, sleeping in, or eating pizza without guilt. But that doesn't look as good on Instagram so have ur OWN self-care ritual u are not forced to do a face mask on Sunday maybe it's a packed day, u can do it even on a Wednesday ?

The busy badge of honor: u wear exhaustion like a medal. "I'm so busy" becomes your identity. You pack your schedule so full that you don't have time to think about whether you actually like your life. Being busy feels productive yes yes but often it's just a way to avoid dealing with the fact that you're not doing what you actually want to do.

🧾 - last note !

You don't need a perfect system but u need a few things that actually work for your actual life, not the life you think you should have , start small, be consistent !

helpful blog - how to build a habit

@bloomzone

mood this week <3

“You shouldn’t self-ID as ADHD/autistic, you’re turning a very real mental condition into a trend” Ok then stop saying delulu. Stop speculating on which cluster C personality disorder the criminals you hear about on the news have. Stop saying “schizoposting” and “acoustic” and “is it restarted?” Stop using “psycopath” and “sociopath” as catch-all ways of calling someone a bad person. Stop saying “the intrusive thoughts won” when you bleach your hair and then turn your nose up at people who suffer from very real, very scary urges of physical/sexual violence. Stop saying “I’m so OCD” as a way of calling yourself neat. Stop treating BPD/ASPD/Bipolar as inherently abusive. Stop saying “OP I am living in your walls” without tagging for unreality. Stop diagnosing complete strangers you’ve never met on r/AITA with NPD.

You first. If you don’t want our disabilities to be treated like trends then stop belittling and minimising them. I’ll NEVER judge a person for trying find labels for their symptoms when an apathetic, racist, sexist, ableist healthcare system refuses to. But I will absolutely judge a hypocrite. Which a lot of you are

𝔠𝔯𝔞𝔳𝔦𝔫𝔤 𝔬𝔠𝔱𝔬𝔟𝔢𝔯