Savin This

offering a virtual hug if you want one. its so horrible that roadkill has to even be a word. take your time if you need it

Tw: mentions/topics of animal death, description of gore (kinda), subjects of death, mild description of traumatic experiences, trauma art (blood and a bit of gore included)

Yesterday i saw a black cat run across the street. I knew this cat. I've seen it often running around in the bushes. I also pet it a few times.

Today around 7:40 AM it was dead. It's insides across the street all bloody. It traumatized me and I've been distressed the whole day. Couldn't focus on anything and zoomed out constantly.

Normally I don't have a problem with seeing dead things but seeing this kitten looking like it's stomach exploded gave me flashbacks of past traumas (my first 2 cats got hit by a car) and a new trauma. The whole day i was thinking about what the owners of the cat felt when their found their beloved pet like that on the street. The kitten was still very long and could've lived way longer.

But seeing this also distressed me bc i also had a dream about dead animals that night and someone trying to murder me and my family (I'm not going to describe the dream as it would be too long and probably too graphic).

I've also been thinking about death a lot recently. Not like my own death, but much rather about the death of my beloved ones. My family, friends, pets, etc. I'm not scared of my own death but I'm scared of the death of the people around me. Mainly about my pets recently because there are a lot of dead rats lying on the streets in and outside our village and a few days ago a dead dog was found in a field.

I'm so scared that moppi and Garfield could die anytime soon. They are the cats that have lived the longest with me. I've had moppi since 2017 or 2018 and Garfield around 2021 or 2022. I've bonded with them more than with my other 3 cats I've had before and I'd be lying if I'd say I don't feel some kind of guilt even though their deaths wasn't my fault. But to me it would feel like that i loved moppi and Garfield more than eddie, ignatz and örni even though i love them all equally the same.

But what also made it traumatic for me was that I've figured out how i died as a cat in my past live. One of my theriotypes is a black mainecoon cat. I never knew how i lost my life as one but i was pretty sure i was killed by a car or something (but never was 100% sure). I got flashbacks and memory shifts that were new to me (but not nice ones). Walking across the road, worrying about nothing until a big engine with bright lights hits you in seconds, not even having the time to run away or figuring out what is happening, until it all went black.

Theriantropy isn't always nice as a lot of people say. As you can see it can also be really traumatic depending on your experience

When I'm coping with something i draw it because i know the paper I'm drawing on won't and can't judge me for my feelings.

It's just scrabbled but it's not meant to be beautiful. It's meant to be meaningful.

I couldn't bring myself today to finish cat drawing requests or any of my art that includes cats. The only thing i was able to do today was draw this.

going on the alterhuman bog cus these r so eyes

I'm finished with art for the semester soooo here's what I've been workin on! All assets are my own. I used a DSLR camera along with Photoshop and Clip Studio Paint

Feel free to send asks about the unaltered photos/photo locations, cause some of the original signs were pretty interesting tbh

this is so fire

Self indulgent fluttershy post

Yknow how some people have ocean themed rooms?? I need that but river themed, freshwater dude

This vibe in my room,,

For too long I've been hidden. But I may have found a place to start shining. I've taken a liking to the #alterhuman community...you all are so open minded to those who are different. And I believe those of us who are alterhuman have unusual gifts that the outside world hasn't really realized or appreciated....

I think alterhumans:

Are more sensitive to their true identity (or identities)

May also be more sensitive to other conscious beings in some way or another (plurality)

Are aware that there's more than these eyes can see

Are incredibly, beautifully diverse in our identities

Are so incredibly brave and strong inside

Have a unique kind of intelligence

Each alterhuman has their own unique gifts

I can't think of anything else. Maybe I'll make a part 2 later. Y'all feel free to add ideas

Hopefully I didn't say anything wrong. I'm new to actually saying stuff here so I'm kinda nervous 🥺

:3 hello!!

waiter waiter more watchers please there has to be more of us

someday i will write out what i believe of the watchers and listeners, and my origins. i want to know what i have in common with the others.

stimboard for : a salmon with gifs of the fish and water stims requested by @jimothy-salmonwich

x | x | x x | x | x x | x | x

im relatively new as well, dont worry abt it ! have a nice day vro !

Is it ok for people who are kin for fun to interact?

Yes absolutely!! Because there’s a word for that: otherhearted! Basically, it’s where you connect with an animal, a fictional character/species, whatever. An otherhearted person doesn’t believe they are the animal or fictional being like a therian does, just that they relate to them or connect with them in some way. If that sounds right for you, then hell yeah <3

Yah, feel free to interact! If you wanna, you can tell me what your kins are and why :D

hiii !

How dare you scroll past without saying hi >:(

i need to stop trying to force myself to shift. im in the mindset that shifting = good, not faking. but it can be uncomfortable. it can just not happen. and thats okay.

i say this bcus i was trying to ear shift and ended up with paw pads that made my hands feel rlly weird.

in other news, the pnw is such a haven for me, creature and human. it is beautiful here.