Anna Karenina, Leo Tolstoy (translated By Rosemary Edmonds)

"if i was orpheus i would simply not turn around" yes you would. if you were orpheus and you loved eurydice, you would. to love someone is to turn around. to love someone is to look at them. whichever version of the myth — he hears her stumble, he can't hear her at all, he thinks he's been tricked — he turns around because he loves her. that's why it's a tragedy. because he loves her enough to save her. because he loves her so much he can't save her. because he will always, always turn around. "if i was orpheus i would simply —" you wouldn't be orpheus. you wouldn't be brave enough to walk into the underworld and save the person you love. be serious

There is a kind of sadness that comes from knowing too much, from seeing the world as it truly is. It is the sadness of understanding that life is not a grand adventure, but a series of small, insignificant moments, that love is not a fairy tale, but a fragile, fleeting emotion, that happiness is not a permanent state, but a rare, fleeting glimpse of something we can never hold onto. And in that understanding, there is a profound loneliness, a sense of being cut off from the world, from other people, from oneself.

Virginia Woolf

i find it funny that conservatives try to paint me calling for the death and destruction of multi-billionaire CEOs as some radical "woke liberal" standpoint. as if that even has anything to do with politics, especially in this era of surface level circus politics. the same way they try to politicize the hurricanes or the wildfires destroying parts of america, as if climate change is somehow a red vs. blue issue. it's no secret i'm from a deeply conservative family in the sticks of florida and i still grew up hearing "i fought the law and the law won". the healthcare system has fucked each and every member of my family in a different way at one point or another, as is the case with pretty much every family in this scorched earth nation. remember when country music, the genre currently associated the heaviest with the most conservative faction of america, used to be staunchly anti-government and about sticking it to the man? remember when the coal miners, grandfathers to the "trump-er hillbillies" of appalachia that everyone loves to write off as ignorant, fought tooth and nail for unionization because the companies that were built off their labor didn't give a shit if they lived or died? since when has "upholding traditional values" gone hand in hand with... defending lawmakers and oil tycoons. my family and i complain about the same issues at the dinner table. the men in charge better hope they can keep their digital smokescreens running as long as they can because the moment the rednecks and the hippies lay down their swords long enough to realize they have the same enemy, all hell is gonna break loose.

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melissa broder, milk fed

“Many people seem to think it foolish, even superstitious, to believe that the world could still change for the better. And it is true that in winter it is sometimes so bitingly cold that one is tempted to say, ‘What do I care if there is a summer; its warmth is no help to me now.’ Yes, evil often seems to surpass good. But then, in spite of us, and without our permission, there comes at last an end to the bitter frosts. One morning the wind turns, and there is a thaw. And so I must still have hope.”

— Vincent Van Gogh

I keep imagining Andrew as a little league coach to the most ferocious pack of little girls

Imagine a little 7 year old, chubby cheeks, missing tooth, two poofs of hair sticking out struggling to get the last strap of her glove fastened so Andrew comes over to help her out. As a thank you she picks a little flower and hands it to him. Andrew keeps that flower tucked behind his ear the rest of the day.

Or a bunch of 10 year olds decided that his black arm bands are boring so they conspire to get him a new pair that they all draw on themselves so he has something pretty to wear. Every time Andrew looks down at his arms he's reminded of their care and kindness.

Or middle school aged girls who ruthlessly go to bat for him whenever some random parent tries to use Andrew's sorted past as an excuse why he shouldn't be allowed to coach children.

Or Andrew being clued into all the hot gossip the team spills because they trust and value his opinions.

A group of girls who give no mercy and are hell on the exy court because they have the best mentor. Not only do they have excellent skills but they are by far the most coherent team.

Andrew being able to guide, lead, and support kids in ways he never received. Andrew being the coolest coach anyone could have ever asked for. Andrew Minyard, the only person who can truly understand and foster the feral nature of little girls.

Vincent Van Gogh

Enough things have happened. No more things for a while. Thank you.

"Lying to yourself doesn't work anymore because deep down you know who it is you want. You know they exist, and you know they exist without you. Can you feel that ache?"