Sigmadomrules - Untitled

~LittleOne

Fundamentals of being a (proper) Dominant

Being dominant is an art form not many fully comprehend, and being dominant over someone takes a lot of responsibility. First and most important is to build trust with your partner. They need to feel absolutely safe in your presence, and you always need to get their consent. No matter the relationship dynamic, you always need to get consent. Trust may take time to build, and you need to be patient with your partner to make sure it is properly established. Second of all, you can't just demand submission. You need to inspire it. You can start being assertive and physically/verbally dominant only if you have proven yourself to be responsible and a safe place for your partner. If you have to ask someone to call you their dom, daddy, etc. you have failed. Third important step. Do your research. Do your research on your partner's kinks, preferences and limits. Do your research on how you can provide them with the pleasure they need and how to keep them safe while doing it. That applies to physical/verbal punishments and/or acts, and to objects and toys you might be using. Real life is not scripted. Your favorite porn movie does not resemble it. Make sure you know what you are doing and are always 100% in control of the situation. Now, some inviolable rules for you and your sub. No matter the trust you've built or how well you think you know your partner's limits , always use a safe word or a signal. If you don't, you are a dangerous person, period. Another inviolable rule is aftercare. You must always plan ahead and know what you can do for your partner's well-being. And you must always provide it, no matter how tired you are or soft you think it makes you look. Physical and verbal aftercare is a rule. And of course, you, the dominant, need aftercare too. No, it doesn't make you look weak. You need it to feel human and there's nothing wrong with that, and it does not change the dynamic you have with your sub.

Not a contradiction.