*smashes Bell* “We Found Love!”

will be thinking abt this forever

Press Conference, Monaco 2023

"What do you look for in a teammate?"

I love seeing people go insane over their ugly little men like, I get it. I have an ugly little man too except he’s hot and beautiful and pretty

there's charles fans learning italian and french, seb fans learning german, max fans picking up dutch words and here I am, a daniel fan, saying c*nt in everything and using the word enchanté wrongly all the time

I’d like to congratulate Lando Norris for his 2024 championship since he’s apparently going to be the only driver for every single team

rip nowins you were bigger than the whole sky

TV direction in F1 2k24:

- Driver does well: camera zoom on wag’s face until they wince awkwardly

- Driver does badly: camera cuts to reserve driver in garage

i just finished watching barbie and i took the liberty of saying which driver is ken and who is barbie for each team. enjoy

PART 1:

RED BULL

Max - Barbie all the way.

Checo - neither Ken nor Barbie, he's irl man.

FERRARI

Charles - Barbie to such a high degree that i cannot fathom it. Watch the film, you'll see him

Carlos - there is not a bigger Ken in the paddock. the confusion, the blank stare, the competition with other Kens.

MERCEDES

lewis - barbie forever and always. the fashion sense, the multiple talents, the general vibe

george - his sense of humor is so ken coded im not even joking

MCLAREN

lando - i want to say ken, he wants me to say ken, but he is a barbie. too calculated and dry of a humor to be ken

oscar - barbie, but when she enters the real world. he gets hit with the reality of life so quickly.

ALPINE

estie bestie - purely for his nickname, he is a ken. no barbie would wear that as proudly as he does.

pierre - ken to a tee, fights other kens all the time, specifically carlos ken.

missing oscar piastri rn. need f1 to create a drama so bad and so chaotic he has no other choice but to tweet something that's completely unrelated to the drama again and show how he's just living in his world