I Just Have So Much About You Boys To Catch Up On. Mother Stuff. You Know, First Tooth, First Crush...

Jensen Ackles | Flaunt Magazine (Michael Muller), May 2006 issue.

*screams internally for several minutes*

Gencest Fic Rec

Mostly oneshots because that's what I tend to read.

A Big Fake Hunter Wedding by Alyndra: humor/crack, case fic in which Sam and Dean get platonically married

acta non verba by laertez: 13x22 episode tag, Dean cleans the blood off Sam

a few things worth saying by hathfrozen: S10 AU, queerplatonic Sam and Dean, platonic kissing

An Irrevocable Condition by remy (iamremy): 4x21 CD, Dean doesn't leave Sam alone in the panic room

a hopeless violence [i named it love] by kanicro: S9 AU, instead of having an angel possess Sam, Dean gives him demon blood to save him

Aleph by story_monger: S4 AU, by the time the angels get Dean out of hell, he's already a demon.

And All She Saw Was Love by stillwaters01: S7 CD, death fic

Brother's Blood by diana_lucifera, stormageddon: Pilot AU, Dean is the one going missing on a hunt so John get Sam from Stanford | first part of a series, future parts wincest slow burn but this one is gen

cat crazed by altered: vaguely late seasons, Sam turns into a catboy, schmoop

Disney Princess Hair by Dyed_Red: Sam gets hit with a sleeping beauty curse, fluff

From me to you by EternalSheWolf: the epic love story of Sam and Dean in snapshots

Ghost in the Machine by phoenixflight: 15x20 coda, Dean sticks around as ghost until Sam burns his body

golgotha by redskyatmorning: S14 CD, Sam becomes the boyking to save Dean from Michael

Growing Darkness Taking Dawn by lightning and a lightning bug (spoons): S4, angst, hurt Sam

happier by altered: S10 AU, with a demon Dean who is obsessed with Sam

if you bite it, you own it by altered: weirdcest, non-sexual kink (biting)

it's not somebody who's seen the light by The_Bookkeeper: AU, Dean is the one with demon blood

I would like to watch you, sleeping by redmyeyes: S1, Dean watches Sam

Less Than Dirt. by ulexite: pre-series + S1, CD, case fic

Marked for Death by aceofhearts61, juba (jubah): post 15x19, Amara sends Sam and Dean on a trip of sorts to resolve their issues

Morning As They Come Down by kirathehyrulian, scippy: post 15x19, fluff

One Question Less by stardust_made: 8x23 coda

patchwork scars by altered: weirdcest, non-sexual kink (biting, painplay)

peace and unquiet by altered: weirdcest, non-sexual kink (hair pulling)

Premonition by cherie_morte: post 15x19, case fic

romeo and juliet are together in eternity (we can be like them) by saintsamantha: vaguely season 2, transfem Sam

so let it out and let it in by nowhere_blake: 12x02 coda, Mary POV

Sounds Like Truth and Feels Like Courage by sprinkles888: late seasons, queerplatonic Sam and Dean | Sam discovers the MoL found a way to utilize soul magic, platonic cuddling ensues amongst other things

stargazing by allforsammy: 8x23 coda, voicemail fix-it

stone number one by iamremy: 15x17 coda

with my pulse on your lips by altered: S10 AU, the demon!Dean we deserved, feeding Sam his blood

🤠

2 questions for you:

1. What is all the drama going on Twitter about entitled fans? Can you explain, I am so lost! What have the “fans” done to other fans? I saw some other stuff about inappropriate photo op requests? What is going on?

2. What is destiel con?

Also just wanted to say I’m happy you had a fun weekend at the con! Thanks for updating on Twitter. It was much appreciated

So there's a group of 4 Jai, Val, Rose, and Robin, which I'll call the Mean Girls because they act like the characters from the movie. They were part of this group called SHAC, which stands for Spotted Hound Art Club. It's Val’s discord server/club that you gain access to through her patreon.

There's a bunch of tweets on the issue here: link, link, link, link, link, link, link, link, link, link.

But basically, the Mean Girls had group chats and discords where they would abuse and bully various people in the fandom. They would go after people who weren't in their clique, but if you got on the bad side of the clique, then you would be bullied relentlessly. Lots of people are sharing stories of being harassed, doxxed, accused of various isms, etc.

One of the rules for being part of their club was that you had to hate Jared or pretend to hate Jared. They drove a lot of the hate towards Jared. They asked people to fake death threats from Jared fans so that they could frame Jared fans for bad behavior.

The Mean Girls were responsible for Misha having to come out as straight. They've caused a lot of toxicity in this fandom.

Apparently they have such a high opinion of themselves, but they make people pay to have one-on-one conversations???

It sounds like they were basically the Destiel Shadow Council 2.0. Kind of crazy that there's been two versions of that group in the fandom in less than 5 years, but I guess there's a really toxic undercurrent in the Destiel fandom.

Apparently they would love bomb and go after young, impressionable fans.

People who used to suck up to Jaistiel are now saying that there were inappropriate photo op requests.

Destiel Con aka A More Profound Con was a free, online convention that was started by fans, for fans, and was destroyed when Val & the Mean Girls threw a shit fit and claimed ableism, which Val apparently loves to do in order to play the victim and get special treatment. It turned into a community event full of love into fighting and mud slinging.

BTW, I saw Jaistiel at the con and they looked very sad and lonely. They were almost always by themselves and on their phone off to the side. Even during karaoke. They are sad, lonely people who have to bully others to have any sense of power.

"Half canon" is an interesting look into the mindset of stalkers and creeps. Because they think the relationship should happen, it has already half happened, you see! It's actually real, and if you say otherwise you are a horrible person.

Omg this is so FUNNYYYYYYY I WHEEZED A bitter heller is fighting with kelios. Obviously very bitter we got everything. "An outright anti." Oh, they sound like dot. They think if you hate the ship you are an anti or a homophobe!!! No babes, the only antis are you people. You are antis of SPN, the real show about the brothers. You only watch for a dumbass, dead ship. "It's a least half canon." No. A one sided crush makes nothing "half canon." There's no such thing. Just take our advice and enjoy your ship on AO30 or whatever it's called. You'll be much happier there. LMAOOOO

Amends

I don't usually dip my toe in the drama pool. At least not too deeply. But what's going on in fandom this week, the revelations, were extreme. The people who have come forward... they were in a cult. I am not being overdramatic about this. Gamifying harassment, forcing disconnections like Scientology, needing everyone to observe the same talking points or risk ostracism, leadership using it for money, criminal behavior towards those The Guru has deemed the Out-Group including members who don't conform heavily enough... That's a cult. The internet has made cult behavior REALLY easy. Likes and engagement make you suddenly aware of which direction your circle is leaning. If you agree, YOU TOO GET POINTS. You too will experience that sense of belonging, and that's what it's all about. So if your circle is being outright mean... if you don't want to be cast off as "not one of them"... maybe you say the mean thing too, even if it's a lie, even if you're not really sure why you're saying it. That approval feels SUPER GOOD and is addictive. And your circle amps each other up, gets meaner and meaner. The only people who stay in the in-group are those who don't speak up about the bad behavior and are willing to keep going along with it. Those aren't friendships. It's a pack of hungry carnivores. It's the same behaviors police gangs use on cops who speak up. I do have some sympathy, especially for the younger people who were still forming their identities. They were victims of indoctrination and criminal harassment. That said, they have to own their own behavior. I hope they learn and grow. They're going to have to have some self-reflection on what they've done, the lies told, the hate, the virulent -isms that were expressed, and literal crimes that were performed in the name of fitting in and winning some points with the clique. They're also going to have to reassess who their out-group is, why they even NEED an out-group over fandom things, and if there are still people in their schema who they have an impulse to hate for no reason.... because of a ship or actor preference. They're going to have to question all the lies they were told and if they are still holding onto hate based on that. That's hard if they aren't even sure what the lies were. It's going to be a process for them. We should give people the space and grace to get better. To deprogram themselves. But this does not mean there needs to be automatic forgiveness. Nobody needs to like anyone. But nobody needs to hate anyone either. Maybe the middle ground is we can grow some indifference or the ability to say, "I'm letting it go, this person is in progress, I can't control their journey, the ball is in their court."

If you were behaving badly, you've earned the suspicion of the people you hurt. A few of you are expressing amends, which is wonderful. But part of the thing with making amends is that you don't get to control the outcome. You make a genuine apology for EXACTLY what you've done, you own your part in it, and you don't make excuses... and from there, people may accept what you've said and they may not. They may forgive you immediately, they may take time, they may never forgive you. You have to learn to be good with that. It can be uncomfortable, to feel disliked, ESPECIALLY if the reason you got into the cult was because of that sense of belonging. Your impulse may be to keep giving explanations of how the group influenced you, to distance yourself. You may tell yourself, "I'm not that person, this isn't really me, it was the group." You want to be seen as CHANGED - virginal and new because you made the hard choice to finally leave the cult. ...It isn't that easy. You want the space and grace and you should get that. But guess what? You need to give that to others, too. You need to understand that people have real reasons to distrust you if you were exhibiting cruelty. And part of doing the work to make amends is the actual work. If you're serious about it, it means a lot of difficult self-reflection. You need to take an unflinching look at WHY you could ignore or participate in racism and lord knows plenty of other -isms, why outright defamation and death threats to actors and other fans were okay, why doxing people and trying to get them fired was seen as fair game, why trying to make someone feel hated and terrible about themselves was your impulse, why you were giggling and congratulating yourself for leaning into your worst impulses...until the group turned on you. Because that's the truth of the situation. You now have that self-knowledge of what you're willing to participate in. The question now is what are you going to do with that? I hope it includes therapy and I don't mean that glibly. I think it's possible there are some internet addictions going on where people crave the rush of getting Likes and engagement... and ragefarming is the best way to get engagement. If that's true... it will be EXTREMELY easy to move from the space of performing FOR the cult to performing AGAINST them, so that you can maintain your hit of Likes. And that is just sitting in the same behaviors. But if you're serious about getting better, if you're serious about being honest with yourself, you're going to need to fight against those inclinations. Please ask yourselves if you truly feel your apologies and want to change...or if maybe some part of you is just posting your attempt at amends because you want to fit in with those leaving or because you're craving that approval. Leaving is great! But are you getting the same psychological hit from your posts now? Are you trying to collect a new group that will lovebomb you because you're seeking self-esteem and miss the people who used to give it to you? I'm not saying this in judgment, I'm saying it because many people go from one cult or MLM to another, seeking that same sense of belonging. That's not my wish for you.

To the people on the other side of this... I'm not saying not to speak up if you see people slipping or people whose apologies are revealed as false words. I'm not trying to tone police people getting angry. There have been real reasons to be angry. HOWEVER... please be aware that if we want people to actually learn and grow we need to give them room to do that. There's nothing wrong with a really direct "This is really shitty and unkind behavior." Going scorched earth every time isn't the way. Is it our responsibility to motivate them to change, is it on us? Absolutely not. But are our actions going to unintentionally make them more likely to try and find a gang again because they're feeling defensive? If we also truly want to make things better, we have to ask ourselves what our goal is. Do we just want to give a tongue-lashing because we're angry? We might. And that can be justified sometimes in life. But cornered people don't often make great decisions. If what we want out of this is for people to be less terrible - there are ways to call people in and out, firmly and not sugarcoated, while still not going on the attack.

To the people who finally spoke up, you should be proud of yourselves for that. You took the first step. I hope you keep walking forward.

If you actually read to here... holy crap, I apologize. Many, many words, but I wanted to put them all down somewhere instead of continuing to overthink it at 3:30am. I do want to say... this is just my perspective. If it came off as trying to tell you how to do or feel, or like I think I'm perfect? Nah, kids. I'm a fallible screw-up, too, who is often "cringe," as the children say. We can all work on ourselves. At least that's the hope. If we're open to it.

Anyway. Love y'all, TGC