Welp, Methinks Thats Enough Internet For Today

Public Health & Safety

kinda gay for a man to sit with his legs far apart. what is all that space there for? another man?

god today i ID’d an old dude buyin booze and he pulled out a fake ID with an elvis pic, then laughed and pulled out a matching one but with curly from three stooges on it, and im like okay please and he finally pulled out his real license and his legal name was steve sinner

like, a god of death or whatever, standing on my lawn: you’re about to experience the wrath of a god

me, who was watering my plants and turned at the sound of voice, thereby accidentally spraying them w/ the hose: oh, wow, i’m so sorry dude, shit

*voice echoing through the subterranean caverns and halls of the catacombs* whatever man. are we gonna kiss or not.

I can fix him [drill sound] [screaming] [chainsaw revving]