We don't talk enough about the implications of the annual Thanksgiving presidential turkey pardon
The thing that the turkey is getting pardoned /from/ is being Thanksgiving dinner, the thing the turkey is being pardoned for is a mystery. What are turkeys' crime that gives them the death penalty unless pardoned mr president? Is being a turkey an inherent crime? They were nearly the national bird!
Also, after a turkey attacked a president during the pardon ceremony, the turkeys that will be pardoned in the future are bred and raised to be docile and calm in front of large crowds and next to the potus, indicating that birds can be artificially selected to be genetically capable of being legally freed from their original sin of being born a turkey
you know what’s wild is that all these crazy standards we hold ourselves to are things that we don’t even value in another person? like i’ve never been like “wow I love that this friend of mine is too proud to ask for help and never complains about their feelings” or “my favorite quality about this friend is that they get straight A’s and never get overwhelmed and has never told me about a problem” or “i love that this friend has never been wrong about anything or slipped up and said something embarrassing once in their life” and yet here we are, pushing ourselves past our limits for and beating ourselves up over slipups of things that our friends probably wouldn’t even rank in the top 50 reasons they like us
Also, like, I'm sorry but if you've set up a free shelter, and people refuse to go because sleeping on the sidewalk under a freeway bridge is more pleasant, that's fucking on you, that's not on them.
You really can't compete with sleeping under the overpass so you are going to force people into shelter?
Unspeakably cruel and stupid.