I... Legitimately Hate That This Makes Sense... I Legitimately Hate That This Exists... I'm Going To

Idk what this is supposed to mean…

i am... as much as i try not to be there will always be some toxicity in me... and therefore i will always be at least a little toxic

are you toxic?

“But of course, interesting manure” Is the greatest way of saying “cool shit”.

I hate when anyone says me wanting to just be a housewife promotes gender roles and I should stop… I’m sorry I want to live my life the way I want to, and I’m sorry that it’s such a big deal to you, like yeah I’m following A gender role… doesn’t mean I’m intentionally doing it to spite you (although at this point I might as well). Also it’s not just an “I want this” anymore, when I was younger and more oblivious to my transness it was just a want, but now I’m a 20+ year old highschool dropout with no coping skills for my mental issues or any meaningful skills that would help me find a job, like yeah I could try, but it would cost more to work than I would earn, not just because of the therapy I would probably have to go to weekly just to be somewhat stable during the time I have a job, but also due to the mental health issues it would cause after I eventually have a breakdown and quit. And you could say “just get coping skills”, but for me it’s not that easy, I need to be in a good mental state to practice coping skills otherwise it’s just going to lead me into a breakdown… or if it’s breathing techniques a trauma induced panic attack, it’s never going to be worth it for me to work… especially if I can’t find a job that caters to my special interests, because if it doesn’t cater to them I will end up hating every moment of it and it will stress me out.

To those who have the privilege of not being a complete and utter failure mentally and in many cases physically, you can live your life however you want, but sadly even if this wasn’t something I wanted I couldn’t help it.

And remember live life for Yourself and Nobody else.

immortality, you get to watch EVERYONE ELSE DIE but can't die yourself

do you think there is a fate worse than death?

If they refuse to respect you for who you are they aren’t friends, if they want to keep you in their life they will put aside the “it sounds weird” stuff and learn your new name and your new pronouns and stuff.

I personally have a 3 strike rule, deadname me once I just correct you and move on, twice I correct you and give you the stare, three times and I either throw you out or leave myself and refuse to speak with you till you learn.

If you’re too concerned about how inconvenient it is to learn my name and pronouns you’re not someone I want to be friends with.

It didn’t used to bother me much.

The name thing, I mean. I figured, you know… people need time. Time to adjust, time to relearn, time to forget and relearn again. I gave them that time—generously, patiently. But now I’m at that point where if someone deadnames me, I will correct them. Every time. Again. And again. And again.

Like Tuesday. I was playing Magic with some friends. One of the guys at the table—I’ve known him for years—he’s not mean or malicious, just… a bit slow on the uptake. Not exactly tuned into social cues, bless him. But gods, I’ve never been so close to flipping the table over a name.

Everyone else at the table called me Terra. Naturally. Because that’s my name. But he kept deadnaming me—over and over.

“Hey Deadname, your turn.”

“It’s Terra.”

“Hey Deadname, don’t forget your extra card.”

“It’s Terra.”

Repeat until madness.

By the end of the night, I was massaging my temples, staring up at the ceiling like the answer to why I bothered was written in the damn fluorescent lights. He finally noticed I was upset—and instead of realizing why, he thought it was because he kept killing my commander.

No. No, sweetie. My frustration wasn’t game-based, it was existential.

I finally just… snapped a little. Told him flat-out, “My name is Terra. You’ve been calling me my deadname all night. I’ve been correcting you all night.”

And he blinked at me, confused, and said, “Sorry. I forgot.”

I slumped back. Like, girl, really? You forgot?

My other two friends leaned in from opposite ends of the table, bless their sassy little souls, and said, “Dude… we’ve been calling her Terra this whole night.”

And he just shrugged. Said he didn’t get it, but he just wanted to play Magic.

And I guess that’s what stings, doesn’t it? That I’m not important enough in his head to remember. That I’m background noise. A name that just doesn’t click, because his desire to play cards outweighs my need to be seen.

But I will keep correcting people. I will keep saying “It’s Terra.” Because every time I do, I take my name back. I remind myself—and everyone else—that I exist. That I matter. That I’m not going to fade just because someone forgets to look closely enough.

So yeah. It sucks. It drains you. But we don’t owe anyone our silence. Especially not when we’ve fought so hard to finally hear our name and feel right.

Yes… very much, the trip to you will probably put me at the precipice of “anxiety crushing her flat”… and that’s if things don’t go poorly, if they do… I don’t wanna think about it…

So… I was talking to some friends online because I couldn’t sleep, and mid sentence I felt something pop in my neck and now I can’t speak… so now I’ve gone 20 hours without sleep and I can’t talk on my own… What the fuck… why does the world hate me? Like this could be a blessing in disguise but at the same time right now it’s feeling like a horrible curse.

seeing as i want to move to finland with my partner, i definitely want to move from where i am

The one above me is purple

Do people care if u get inspired by other polls.... Anyway the red/blue poll I see going around is nice but I found that I associate my friends with all sorts of colors so. here