Would You Date A Hater

i am a firm believer that ghost always under reacts about Very Serious Things and freaks everybody else out because of it

soap, trying to chat to ghost after they wrap up a mission: —crazy right? and after that he—hey are u even listening to me? wtf

ghost, whose eyes have not been on soap once since he started talking: i’m listening. i’m just also hallucinating my dead family in that corner over there at the same time. i can multitask

soap, Extremely Concerned: ?????????

ghost, now swaying: yea one of them jabbed me with a hallucinogenic. don’t worry, i slit his throat

soap:

ghost: don’t look at me like that, i can handle it. it was only one syringe

soap:

———————

like imagine 141 post-mission, all sitting quietly in their exfil vehicle and then ghost suddenly sighs extremely loudly

ghost: ugh

price: what, simon??

ghost, peeved: my rib just punctured my lung

everyone:

ghost: :/

price, going into cardiac arrest, so tired of simon’s shit:

Soap, putting his hands over Ghost's eyes: Guess who!

Ghost: It's either Soap or the cold, clammy hands of death.

Soap, putting his hands away: It's Soap!

Ghost: Dammit.

me and my mutuals

He went for the forehead and backed off (because he only kisses the forehead of those he kills).

just another excuse i found to draw ghost like that ngl

she mummied on my dust til i pummelled it with opulence

i don't mean to shit on Vegas too much when he's going through it but i did laugh when, after his father hits him and calls him and Macau not worthy to be his sons, of all the places in and out of that giant house on a giant property he had to go to his captive's room to dramatically demonstrate his emotions like 'ooooooohhhhh man i'm really goin through it, i'm so angry, i'm so unhinged, my life is so hard...' and when he doesn't get a reaction he's like 'pete are you catchin all of this...hey pete....PETEEEEEEE'

everything i do i do with playful and bisexual intent

Soap has to explain things in the most complicated way possible

Alex: Wait, wait, run that again?

Soap: Okay! So, this- *points at Ghost* that is my boyfriend

Ghost: Yo

Soap: This *points at Alejandro* this is my boyfriend's bff/homo-erotic homie

Soap: *points at Rudy* this is my bff AND my boyfriend's bff/homo-erotic homie's husband

Soap: This *points at Valeria* is my my boyfriend's bff/homo-erotic homie's ex girlfriend who we're not still sure why she's here

Soap: This is my dad *points at Price*

Soap: And this is my dad's son *points at Gaz*

Alex: That's my boyfriend, but thanks for the introduction anyway ...who's that?

Soap: Oh that? *points at Graves*

Soap: That's a fucking nuisance

Graves: Thanks.