Otomedetective - Local Aro Otome Lover

Kazui's untold shame in Cat

AKA "the time I wanted to analyse the cop car scene and ended up analysing the entire song"

'Shame' is something Kazui knows all too well. It follows his every move, dictates his every thought, possesses him stronger than any other emotion, and Cat does a perfect job of conveying this, having Kazui call his deceit "tacky" and calling his attempts to be open "greedy", but I think Cat shows his shame best in what he doesn't explicity say, rather than what he does.

Take one of the first scenes in the song, for example. Specifically the scene of him sitting in the police car with Hinako. Here, he looks over to Hinako while singing "I just wanted to touch, to caress. I just wanted to be touched". I am personally of the belief that Kazui is a gay man who tried to force himself to like women by lying his way through his relationship with Hinako in order to fit into the expectations of his family and peers. But here Kazui is, seemingly expressing genuine sexual desire towards Hinako, which would go against my theory, right? Honestly, I'm not convinced by what he says here.

The prisoners videos are their true feelings, they can't intentionally lie in them, but they can however remember a time they lied, or if they try to lie to themselves in their thoughts, their song will reflect that. Kazui's lies are, as he himself describes, "two-way", he lies to others and he lies to himself— because he, more than anyone, wants his lies to be the truth. Looking at his second voice drama, Es tells him that they believe he cheated on Hinako, and that they find him acting on his sexual urges like that "stupid" and "disgusting", but regardless, they still opted to forgive him. What Es says here isn't exclusive to Es, and is often how men who do similar things are perceived by society. A man may act openly sexual, and he may be seen as perverted or disgusting for it, but ultimately there's usually little consequence for this behaviour— it's brushed off as "men being men" and often encouraged further by the other men in their lives, even if other people will look down on them for it. In other words, Kazui is attempting to frame to himself that what he's doing (going after a woman he isn't romantically interested in) is done out of sexual desire, both in the past and currently, because doing so is more 'acceptable' than his true, genuine, shameful desires. As he says in the next scene, "So it's wrong? Oh, shove that! Innocent, isn't that right?", he knows that both us and society at large will forgive him for what he's done if it's from a place of uncontrolled heterosexual desires, rather than what's really going on.

His shame becomes more clear once you see the intention behind what he's saying, rather than what he's actually saying. However, I think what he doesn't say here is even more revealing. "I just wanted to touch, to caress. I just wanted to be touched"— following what he's saying here, the next line the audience is expecting is "I wanted to be caressed" and yet instead, he quickly moves on and changes the scene entirely. We're left hanging as he gives us no time to process the way he completely skipped over the next natural line, and I'd imagine that's also how it felt to Kazui. "I just wanted to be touched" is coming way too close to the truth for him, and his shame and fear physically stops him from completing his sentence, instead forcing him to race to the next scene before he admits too much— before he admits something he himself desperately wants to deny. This is the first clear sign in the song of Kazui's true desires starting to peak out before immediately being shoved down.

Moving on to the scene that follows, we have Kazui continuing to verbally lie to himself with "So it’s wrong? Oh shove that! Innocent, isn’t that right? Maybe, perhaps… or… could it come true… like, it’s for the sake of true love, who wouldn’t lie for that?" As said previously, Kazui is desperate to convince himself both that what he's doing isn't wrong so he doesn't have to deal with the shame of being a manipulative person, and that he can eventually fall in line with the way the world tells him he has to be. He's not doing anything wrong and he will surely fall in love with her with time— so there's no need for him to think too hard about the reality of the situation.

The framing of this scene backs this idea up even more. We see Kazui and Hinako walking side by side before he turns towards her, but the way this is shown is by focusing on their feet. Looking down at the ground, especially while with someone, can have many meanings. When done intentionally, it can be a way of showing respect to another, but when done subconsciously it's more often than not a sign that someone is anxious or ashamed, especially in fiction. I'd imagine that Kazui's physical self isn't actively looking at his feet in this scene, as he's learned how to make his body language line up with his persona more than his reality, but internally he's only capable of avoiding really looking at himself and only looking downwards. He doesn't want to internally admit to himself the truth that he's hiding, even though he's very aware of it, and he can't bring himself to really face himself or the reality of his actions— once again, shame is physically blocking him from doing so. This is shown further in the next scene, with him giving Hinako flowers, and then a ring. Notably, this scene focuses on his hands and Hinako, however Kazui as a whole is out of view. He focuses on his actions, his pretty lies, and the positive reactions of the people near him caused by those actions, but Kazui himself is shut out of this, both his true desires and overwhelming shame are kept out of the picture.

Skipping over to the scene after the chorus, we have Kazui confessing his love to someone most likely his childhood friend/the bartender from Half. Kazui starts this scene by announcing "Phew, oh wow I’m drunk" however looking at the glass itself, it's easy to see that Kazui is lying here. The drink has been drank out of, though not by much, and knowing that Kazui is someone who drinks somewhat regularly, it's extremely hard to believe he's that much of a lightweight. Rather, it's much more likely that he's giving himself a convienient excuse for what he says next: "Hey, so what if I said I liked-liked you, what would you do?" Kazui is extremely dependent on the opinions of others, especially those important to him, as well as the feeling of being safe, so by laying out this lie before his confession, he can hopefully lessen the consequences for trying to tell someone his truth. If we focus less on what he says here and more on how he says it, we can hear how extreme his anxiety in this scene is. His voice starts out strong, however quickly begins shaking, and by the end of the sentence his voice is almost inaudible, as if he can barely get the words out. Even with an excuse laid out in advance, Kazui can hardly bring himself to say a single sentence— he is absolutely terrified.

This scene also uses the same tactics the car scene and the proposal scene use, having Kazui sing before cutting himself off and having him move to the next part of the song, and never fully framing Kazui. "I just wanted to ask, so it's out in the open. I just got a little greedy". Unlike the car scene, there's no noticible pattern to what he's saying so we can predict what he wants to actually say, however we can still hear the music itself flow as if there should be more to what Kazui says, only for us to be left with nothing. He isn't lying to himself to justify his actions, and panicking when he gets a little too honest for his liking, but rather he's being intentionally vague about his feelings and what is happening. We don't know much about this night, we're given him confessing and that's about all, but we can infer by Kazui immediately insulting himself, immediately going back to hiding and lying in the next scene, and by him telling Es in his voice drama that he's tried opening up to others in the past only to be unable to truly be himself around them, that whatever happened after he confessed wasn't good. We also later see the same glass he's drinking be knocked off the table. It doesn't appear to be knocked off with much force, it wasn't violently pushed or thrown, however the glass itself doesn't seem too close to the edge for it to be accidentally pushed off either. Whatever truly happened is anyone's guess, but one thing is clear— the memory of this night is one that causes Kazui much shame and pain. This is further supported by the framing of the scene, again having Kazui focus on his actions rather than him as a whole, and when he isn't acting, the camera is far away from him, hiding his expression and distancing himself from the memory and the viewers. He doesn't want to focus on that night, he doesn't want to look at that version of himself and he doesn't want to feel the extreme shame that radiates from it all.

Finally, we approach the end of the song. After 39 long years of Kazui shoving down his every emotion, lying to himself and others until he can't take it anymore, he tells Hinako the truth. The first thing to leave his mouth? "To be carassed by you, that would be perfection". At long last, he finishes his sentence from the beginning. The audience by now has long since moved on from the car scene, having been overwhelmed with the rest of the song and expecting his first explanation for his actions to forever go unfinished, but for Kazui? This entire time, it hasn't left his mind. He hasn't been able to move on or forget about it as we would have, it's been constantly hidden and shoved down in his mind, yet never truly being able to be snuffed out for good. And what is this terrible, shameful, disgusting desire he's been rejected for and drowned in self-loathing his entire life for? The desire to be carassed. Sexually, we can interpret this as a want to be a submissive partner, as this desire is originally paired with his lie of wanting to dominate Hinako sexually. Emotionally, however, it's a desire to be treated gently. To have his entire self be seen and not be punished for it, but loved for it. To be seen as and treated as fragile, and have this fragility be a positive, not a negative. For his entire life, he has despised himself so strongly for the shameful wish to be weak and loved. Unfortunately for both Hinako and Kazui, once he can finally get this sentence out, he's unable to stop it all from pouring out, his truths completely overwhelming the both of them.

The audience has seen this same scene before in Half, although it has a completely different feel to it, and comparing the two really highlights the shame Kazui currently feels about this day. Originally, we're shown a very calm discussion, with Hinako and Kazui seemingly reaching an understanding about everything, with only a slight hint at any real conflict happening afterwards, showing a single image of Hinako acting in a very animated way as if arguing. In Cat, however, we're shown Kazui acting in a frightening and almost erratic way to begin with, ending with him looking at her with monsterous eyes and varociously tearing apart a dove with his teeth. In Kazui's first voice drama, he mostly maintains his calm, stable persona, and Half reflects this by being a very slow, sombre song and video, as the songs themselves are taken fron the thoughts the character has at the end of the interrogation. His second voice drama shows Kazui pouring his heart out, unable to stop forcing out his self-hate once he starts, and this scene in Cat is clearly reflects that. Obviously Kazui didn't actually animalistically eat a live bird, as hot as that would be, but Kazui's spat out guilt and shame from his voice drama has completely dyed this memory. No longer can he see it as a day where he sadly confessed his secrets to Hinako, it's now become the day he disgustingly destroyed everything dear to her with almost malicious intent. His true self has always been one that's caused him so much pain and shame, and now that he's let it come to the surface, he's unable to do anything other than villainize himself further.

Looking at where Kazui is now at the start of trial 3, it's likely his next video will show this even further, his self-loathing reaching a peak like never before, unable to be hidden away. It's hard to imagine what it could be like when comparing it to the extreme shame we already see here, but it's clear that this guilt and disgust he feels towards himself is so deeply ingrained in him that he's extremely unlikely to reach a point in which he can be freed of it as of now. If Cat is a video of Kazui desperately trying to hide these feelings until it all explodes at the end, I can't help but be excited yet somewhat scared of what's in-store for us with a Kazui who's given up on trying to cover it all up. Regardless of what comes next, I can't wait for it all to be revealed, our life-long liar finally completely removing his mask.

i ended up staying up way way way too late replaying tmgs4. and i may or may not have made a list of things i'm excited to tell you about further into the series. i'm sorry in advance

oooh fun!!! i haven't made much progress lately bc i've had a super busy work week, but I'm going to try to play a little more of it today. I'm super excited to hear about everything too lol :))

dont be embarrassed about something u enjoy ok 

Hey hey, everyone! My name is Wren, and welcome to Otome Detective!

Currently Playing: Tokimeki Memorial Girl's Side: First Love Plus ~ Click here to view my Game Collection on Backloggd <3

I originally made this blog to talk about otome games only, but I had a rather long otome slump this year, during which I played the entirety of Persona 5 Royal (and a lot of Persona 3 Portable before the Akihiko social link made me start to miss my otome games again lol) so I'd love to talk about other games too, especially in the rpg & mystery genres!

If you'd like to read my about page, you can do so here.

If you'd like to read my thoughts on being an aromantic otoge player, check out this post here.

I plan to eventually write and share my personal reviews of certain otome games and routes, so stay tuned for that!

finished my first major endings of little goody two shoes and and

when the wwhen the girls and they in lomve and the bad ending then thebgood ending and then and thenhow

reposting some more gnosia art, feat my MC

this is gonna kill me

oh absolutely! and it's a topic I'd love to talk about for a sec lol~

i love that uncomfortable art exists, and i think it serves an important purpose in helping us confront important topics through fiction -- and I like what this modder is doing because I think that Persona (a series that revolves heavily around identity and the idea of a true self) is a great avenue to explore topics of gender. Modding is a type of transformative work, just like fanfiction is -- and like in fanfiction, there are a million different ways you can alter the source material depending on the sort of story you want to tell. It can be fluffy and self-indulgent, it can be an au that genderswaps a character and does nothing else, or it can be a version of the story that explores more realistic or uncomfortable topics if you want.

However, that's not necessarily the experience everyone is seeking when they look for a female protag mod -- not everyone wants the story to change, and not everyone is comfortable with misgendering in a game they're playing for fun. And with the model swap, I totally see how it would feel weird to have a dialogue about how a clearly feminine character looks super masculine or gets called he/him all the time.

It would be cool if there was another mod that meshed better with the fem model so that both could exist and serve separate purposes.

it's ultimately up to the modder what they're going to create, and they're under no obligation to make something that will appeal to everyone, especially since they're doing this for free. So when it comes down to whether to center player comfort or realism, it's honestly just a matter of taste. It depends on what kind of story you're trying to tell, y'know?

the different persona series femc mods are so funny when you line them all up next to each other

persona 4 femc mod: it works for the full game, but for some reason, everyone's kind of a dick in this mod

persona 5 femc mod: the mod maker just drops an update twice a year and disappears but the update is fucking great

persona 3 femc mod: everyone's going insane with weekly updates. did you know that they edited the text for the different languages in the game. they changed the pencil case andpen. they added an otome game to the arcade. they--

persona 5 beta femc mod: they're trying to be the new persona 3 femc mod but it's super early in development. also girl your hair is a tomato

lmao the tomato hair comment is so real 😭 i do think she's really cute though lol, and i love the concept art she's based on~

I've seen bits and pieces of all of these, but only played with the reload one, and even then just a little bit. I may try out the one for 4 when i eventually play that one though!!

The first ever otome game-themed Steam festival, Otome Games Celebration, is now live on Steam!

What are otome games? They're romance-driven games where the player can play as a woman and pursue romantic relationships, with a focus on men as love interests. Our festival showcases the wide world of otome, with some of the games featuring customizable main characters, love interests with a variety of genders, and more.

Over 100+ otome games agreed to take part in the event from 80+ developers, with titles from BUSTAFELLOWS to A Date with Death to Royal Alchemist and more. The event will go for a full week, May 19-26. We have otome on sale, free otome, upcoming otome demos, and more!

One of the pain points of finding visual novels & otome on Steam is the lackluster categorization that doesn't allow for finding the specific story genres you want to find. To try to counter that, I've created lots of widgets separated by story genres, such as a fantasy category, cute & comfy, and more. We even have categories for games with customizable MCs, all male love interests, and more!

check out the wide world of otome on Steam!