Talking About No Contact And Estrangement Is Becoming A Serious Thing Online, So I Want To Put This Out

Talking about no contact and estrangement is becoming a serious thing online, so I want to put this out there. You do not have to try to fix things with your parents before you're allowed to cut off or reduce contact. You do not have to try and convince them to treat you right before you take care of yourself and do what you have to for your safety and wellbeing.

I didn't sit my parents down and explain to them that they'd been abusing me and try to convince them to stop. The likelihood that they would have received this well felt minuscule. Once I got the courage to do what I needed to do, I sent an email telling them that I was ending all contact between us.

Because ultimately it wasn't about them. It was about me, and the fact that I was unable to break out of old survival modes and stop putting on a false self to please them. I needed the space to grow. I needed to be away from them to heal. Period.

If you want to try setting boundaries with your parents before going no contact, go for it. But you're not bad or undeserving of peace because you didn't run that gauntlet. It's optional. There are no rules, no hoops you must jump through before you deserve what you need.