I Want To Add, In Retrospect, That While I Wouldn't Call Their Relationship Toxic Per-se I Acknowledge

I want to add, in retrospect, that while I wouldn't call their relationship toxic per-se I acknowledge and accept the imperfect and fighty nature they bring to each other's table half. I just wouldn't say it's as packed as people sometimes call it to be. They obviously care for one another, that's been proven continuously, just by the fact that they stay by each others side is kind of enough to be able to say that. But the girls do be fighting. Not with guns, maybe knives, but never lethally. That kind of fighting comes with the territory of being a cartoon and especially a cartoon that's world is filled with pricks.

I really need to rewatch venture bros again so I can post about the other guys and not just these two thugs

Onion culture is rant posting about an au nobody even knows about (yet) for a fandom you've never even interacted with (but study extensively, at least the online part of it.) Hello, internet! I like to have fun, well-dressed fun. As of recent that faux-fur coat draped fun was lined with self-insertship. I call it PB&J, short for Petebilly & Jetliner (jetliner refers to the jetliner position, or more commonly known as a wall-sit / squat. The usage of this word will make more sense in due time) and the jist of it is that me and my brother's self inserts (the mutant orphaned Candastrino bros.) have a raging grudge against Pete White for being the cause of the cancellation of their favorite show, and thus go on a revenge-trip to finish him off for good- but accidentally end up getting adopted. Love born from hate, as never pictured in the paper. Anyway, it's real fun, and I'll post more about it when I find the want to so this will make a bit more sense later, but as of now the following rant about fandom culture is laid out for my enjoyment, and if you want, you can have a piece too.

So. This au really is- aside from the riffs on fandom somehow infantilizing and villainizing Pete all at once- really a way for me to answer the question they stick on you that is, after Billy remembers, what happens now? How do they handle it in such a way that means for the next four seasons they continue to live with and love each other? And I think having them just throw it into a bickering session as,

PETE: "what, so you think I'm evil too, hah? I thought we was 'sposed ta be PATNERS, Billy!"

BILLY: "NO! I'm telling you AND THEM [emphasis on that line so that white knows he's not being targeted] that it'sch idiotic to believe any of that schtill carriesch enough weight to drag anybody down! white, that wasch in the eightiesch! I don't CARE, we are partnersch and nothing I've done dischprovesch that!"

PETE: "OH, WOW! SO YOU'RE STILL JUST THROWING ALL THA BLAME BACK TA ME-"

-And so on, and so on. I'm cutting it off there or they could go on until white starts crying and makes a daring escape. They'll resolve it in their own heads in a jiff. And so the answer to that question pretty much is they move on. Fandom are all sticklers for clinging to things they find invokes certain angsty scenes, which okay that's whatever, the heart wants what it wants especially in spaces like these where it can always just have it by the power of folly-filled friendship, but it doesn't work with VBros and that's why it's* (the way they handle the characters*) been so confusing to me. Because they handle them like they're characters instead of the people that Doc and Jackson write them as. They write about life and fans see it as unmoving failure after failure, but that's just one part of life. Failure is just one interconnected piece of the huge net that becomes how someone lives. Billy and White's 80's escapades are just one part of their lives. It's just one aspect of the adventure! Adventure, by the by, is continuing to do something even when it gets obscenely stupid. So, basically, life is an adventure and venture Brothers is an action show (kind of), if you catch my obvious drift wafted by a fan directly in front of your face.

It's also a good way to see Conjectech finally portrayed healthily. Another thing Fandom(TM) would stick to because of how they prey on the weak points of characters is Petebilly being oh-so toxic, which just isn't the case. They pick out the parts of the VBros bible they want to see instead of the stories it's actually telling. And like most Christians, they make casual soulmates out to be evil gay people that hate everyone including each other. White & Billy, very simply put, aren't like that. Contrary to popular belief they aren't a toxic partnership. Media literacy is a bit dead now, which may contribute, but I digress. Most of when we see them fight on screen isn't genuinely rage filled. It's husband-wife little squabbles, or it's friendly fire similar to how you'll dish on a pal just for breathing wrong. when you know someone for such a long time, that becomes pretty natural. People that aren't you and your boyfriend won't realize you're kidding and that at the end of the day you'll be cuddling no matter what. In the morning, you'll share cereal, and insult how he holds his spoon. Familiarity breeds hilarious discontent in anyone that's ever been familiar with anyone, and it is a phenomena that I certainly believe should be studied. They're healthy and functional, but they function in a way that some people who rely on tropes and ideas they learned over time don't understand isn't those tropes. Platonics are not for the faint of heart! And fandom, my dear sweet fandom, are all like cats getting scared at a zucchini by misbelieving it's an odd phallus. That goes for most Fandom everywhere, it is an objective statement. At a point you realize of course people can't read, by golly they can't even see the whole picture. comme ci, comme ça. Anyway, Pete and Billy's on screen interactions are otherwise incredibly sweet. One scene I'd like to point out that, even though it was before their move to NYC and arc to accepting their roles as each other's best friend (which is something I would love to touch on later (ehe, that's what she said)), is a scene from the first episode their company was officially introduced. "Are You There God? It's Me, Dean"'s formal introduction to everyone's favorite pair of sometimes-scientists all-time-geeks is a perfect capture of the characters. They start with Billy in a little floral apron, and he's telling off white, who's currently playing GTA, for not flushing the toilet. Ever. They get a call, White is, naturally, busy so Billy answers it. He opens the call with a slogan White promotes heavily, though it hasn't grown too well on Billy (yet. In "Handsome Ransom," he uses it cheerfully.) Then he ends the call with a chipper "bai-bal!" and is, naturally, riffed on for saying that. The game is paused now and White is being let in on the juicy deets of their new job. They have a bit of a back and forth, and at the end a high-five is brought up, naturally, but denied. Naturally. High fives come later when White finally gives in to them as he will with most anything his business partner puts forward. In any case, they've got a good thing going on, and basically this AU is a great way for me to show that they do because half the time people don't believe it.

That was all copy and pasted from a txt document. Onion Culture is loving text documents. Another point I could make is how nobody really gets how Billy works, but that's another rant for another day. My father, when I sent him this rant, said that "people will hate it, but what don't they?"

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1 month ago

BONK CROSSOVER

BONK CROSSOVER

Turrón? Turrón! Turrón! Turrón! Turrón! Turrón! Turrón! Turrón!


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1 week ago

Onion culture is.. I don't know, it's like, eleven right now I can't think of a proper way to word this summary. This writing is probably not the best because again it is eleven and I wrote it because I simply had to explain how this as a conversation would actually most likely go, because I have a desperate need for people to understand characters I love , probably because of something in my childhood.

Yes, Billy's lisp is written in. Bite me.

(this is after White would've said something about what happened to Billy in IHOF like how everyone says he'd feel guilty about it heres my take on if he did (which for the record he probably does but buries it and they prolly js silently accept forgiveness as they become better friends but like this is if they talked to each other about that stuff instead of Science and other such.. whatever, nerd things.))

BILLY: Yeah, abscholutely it waschn't okay! It wasch not okay- no, you were an adult and definitely schould've known better than to get schome barely-eighteen-yearsch-old-kid you plucked off a gameschow put through the non-figurative ringer, but it wasch alscho a genuine mischtake. Not one you even schould've had the schlightest chance to make in the firscht place, but.. eh.. look, we could be at thisch forever if we wanted to, okay? But I actually have schtuff to do, and forgivenessch isch what allowsch it to get done. Maybe you schould try it schometime. Asch far asch I know you haven't gotten any of my other partsch ripped off, scho.. other than being a schtain on my life conschtantly, you're not scho bad. And, even then, it'sch like.. schome of my favorite schirtsch have schtainsch. You know? I won't ever forget losching what I had, I am not denying the schuck of the schituation- and of coursche I most likely won't ever berid of the grudge on Hunter for what the O.Sch.I did- but I've come to termsch with what'sch now, and it's schtuff I can live with. And, you know.. scho are you.

Still slouched on the couch, White stares unblinking into Billy's eyes, processing with a neutral expression underlined with the lingering irritable sadness he always seemed to carry himself with. Their TV came off of the ads embedded in the DVD, startling White from his trance and allowing Billy to move his gaze out of the lock his companion put them in. White was able to reconnect with the rest of the world around him and remembered they had orange chicken that was currently going cold on the sophisticated plastic tray inbetween them. He picked a good one out of the box and stretched a pinched finger full of chicken from him as an offering.

WHITE: Mm?

BILLY: Oh, thanksch.

WHITE: Mm.

BILLY: With or without commentary?

[queue them staying up all night, because either option additionally comes with the non-optional Billy commentary, too.]

And so, our heroes lived mediocrely together long ever after. Generally. If you were gauging the amount that's good, bad, or neutral, it's generally mostly neutral. That goes for anybody's life though. The end.


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2 months ago
Another Crossover Art That Only 2 People Will Understand

another crossover art that only 2 people will understand


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2 months ago

Bilyy whre is the cocainer


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2 weeks ago

Onion culture is being forced by your dastardly mind into noticing the little things about the so-called Skrunkly. I was going over White's lines in my head the other day, and realized he said once (iirc not every time he brings this up) that he was "*an* albino" instead of just saying "I'm albino," which- again, kind of forced by the dastardly mind- brought me to the conclusion that it was another tally to the "White Thinks He's A Freak" board as it made a clear but quiet distinction between himself and humanity because of his albinism. It's like he was saying he was a different species entirely. On a lighter note, he's getting happier in merch! Here's him as seen in the packaging for the doll action figure line (2014) and his face on the recent pins.

Onion Culture Is Being Forced By Your Dastardly Mind Into Noticing The Little Things About The So-called
Onion Culture Is Being Forced By Your Dastardly Mind Into Noticing The Little Things About The So-called

Though, I will admit, taking the character out of the elements of the show I do kind of like seeing him slightly upset by everything better than I do him content. I just wanna see this guy chewed up and spat out on the street like dollar-store bubblegum


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2 months ago

Brock Samson chewing some skittles

Brock Samson Chewing Some Skittles
Brock Samson Chewing Some Skittles

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2 months ago

"damn I'm crying over an insect" "why am I having such strong feelings over how the sky looks" "it's weird how happy this small thing made me feel" THAT'S BECAUSE YOU LIVE HERE!!!! you live on this earth. everything all the time is an experience, no matter how common or mundane. this world is unique. so are its small moments. it is good to enjoy a tiny thing. you love the world even at its smallest scale.


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