The Shock On His Face Is Priceless

David Floyd

It makes me happy when they listen

those spice eating contests would go wild. those people who eat blowfish and jellyfish? grapefruits. caffeine!! there's a lot of foods we're technically not supposed to eat but we do it anyways because we're like that

You know how certain tastes allow you to know that you shouldn't eat something, though humans are weird so we do it anyways?

Was thinking how certain foods are bad for animals, like citrus foods

What if aliens' sense of taste indicated things that could kill them

What if to aliens the entire flavor profile we call sour meant poison

What if a human walked up to one of these aliens and took a bite out of a lemon slice without breaking eye contact

Could be a dominance move, a lead into a prank, or just being oblivious that from the aliens' point of view the human was attempting suicide right in front of them when the human is just a weirdo who eats lemons

These are the things I think of when I should be sleeping

Please elaborate on this idea if you want to

" Dark Clouds over the Sea " //© Insel Rügen

ppl who don't get cats will try to argue that cats don't love you meanwhile cats will cry and cry and cry and cry like the world is ending until you hold them like a baby and give them a kissy on their perfect lil forehead

we are not getting out of the plant blog allegations with this one

going to bed at 8pm was the best idea I ever had. vastly improved my quality of life. I also don't have very good ideas so this was new to me

My tattoo artist told me his teenage son came out to him as trans by giving him a bunch of blue cupcakes and a greeting card that said "it's a boy!"

"That's cute," I said.

"It was NOT cute!" he snapped. "I thought he was pregnant."

idk I think it was something without context and it was made a meme

FINE. I'VE REMOVED HIM FROM THE PLINKO.

no offense to sharks but they look so fucking stupid. and I'm not talking ugly, I mean they look like they have 2.9 braincells all the time. there are zero thoughts behind those eyes.