Something New

Something New

I had a dream about, a lot of things. 

but mainly that I gave birth to a baby I wasn't prepared for at all. I didn't know I was even pregnant. I was so unprepared I knew I needed to search for some diapers. I kept asking for help but no-one would help me. I asked a nurse and she said “usually people come with that stuff” and I was like... “ I didn’t know I was pregnant” 

so I put my baby down to search for diapers. I ran into a house, and there was a lot of things happening that aren't relevant to this part of the story. 

but I fell asleep and when I woke up and remembered I was a mom and needed to go find my baby !

so I ran and found her. and she was starving. She was excited to see me and I was like, okay I need to change your diaper. Then I stopped and said... wait. your hungry. I need to feed you. So I paused because not only did I not find diapers but I didn’t get any food. But then I realized , this is a baby. I am a mom. I can breast feed. So I picked her up and fed her and she ate and was satisfied. Then we laid back to rest finally. 

I talked to my mom about this. 

She said babies are a symbol of new life. 

Maybe the play I've been working on. I gave birth to something new and unexpected. And then I neglected it. But when I finally gave it my attention, it was happily waiting for me.

I chimed in with, it’s not even like wasn't tryna take care of the baby I was looking for ways to take care of her. But when I found her, what I was looking for wasn't even what she needed. She needed me, and what I already had.

milk

something from me. and my being. 

Wild dream.

Interesting idea. 

but I gotta listen to it. 

I gotta feed it myself.

I am enough

I can take care of my own creations

I just need to give it me. 

and it will be satisfied.