I’m Sick Asf With The Flu Rn And Everything Feels Like A Prolonged Dream But When I Woke Up And Saw

nishikiigoi

6 months ago

the deed is done… sebastian is bootied up and i want to itch my leg

And There Will Be No Tenderness

Red. With Grelle, everything was red, crimson red, scarlet red. Red was the blood spilled between them, and red was the colour of her painted lips, smeared across his mouth. She liked him better like this; she had said that before, on a night much like this one. Liked him better with her kisses pressed into his skin, like red branding. He had told her what a chore those kiss-marks were to wash off in response, and she only grinned knowingly. Sebastian didn’t tell her to stop. Grelle’s hand curled around his tie, tugging, her teeth sinking into the swell of his lower lip. Sebastian wasn’t quite sure when he began to notice the little minutiae of her appearance, the little trivial things like her fresh manicure, or the floral perfume she wore. Somewhere along the line he had become so painfully aware. - Or: Sebastian being painfully smitten and completely oblivious to it, and Grelle going What The Fuck. (Plus getting her guts rearranged. She deserves it. As a special treat.)

Read on Ao3

It began as most things did, when it came to the grim reaper known as Grelle Sutcliff.

An open window, a flash of crimson, and a sinister cackle.

This was becoming far too common an occurrence, and each time Sebastian had to interrogate himself on why he allowed this to keep happening. And each time, he came up short, grasping for a logical explanation that simply wasn’t there. Each night, against his better judgment, he left that window open, unbothered by the bite of the cold evening air, anticipating a certain scarlet reaper’s appearance in his quarters.

It was irrational. Senseless. Grelle Sutcliff was a vexatious creature. Irksome, grating. Sebastian could think of a great myriad of words to describe her, none of them were likeable.

And even if she was likeable , what did that matter to him? A demon had no need for idle attachments; such things, things such as affection , they were fleeting, meaningless emotions. An impossibility for such beings, at least as anything more than a passing fancy.

The only mortal creatures Sebastian has ever felt affection for were those of a feline nature.

And yet.

She was in his bed once more. Their meetings were never pretty. No, their intimacy was just as severe, just as ruthless as Grelle herself was. As Sebastian was, beneath the tailcoat, beneath the etiquette, beneath the facade of the butler he was playing.

Their kiss was a clash of teeth and tongue. It was bruising, it was messy, scandalous, by the standards of Victorian propriety, but Grelle only smiled against his lips. She had already sliced his lip with her teeth—that was something Sebastian quickly learnt, the first time they had wound up like this, that those teeth of her’s were every bit as razor sharp as they looked—but she lapped up his blood like it was sweet nectar, a divine ichor.

Red. With Grelle, everything was red, crimson red, scarlet red. Red was the blood spilled between them, and red was the colour of her painted lips, smeared across his mouth. She liked him better like this; she had said that before, on a night much like this one. Liked him better with her kisses pressed into his skin, like red branding. He had told her what a chore those kiss-marks were to wash off in response, and she only grinned knowingly. Sebastian didn’t tell her to stop.

Grelle’s hand curled around his tie, tugging, her teeth sinking into the swell of his lower lip. Sebastian wasn’t quite sure when he began to notice the little minutiae of her appearance, the little trivial things like her fresh manicure, or the floral perfume she wore. Somewhere along the line he had become so painfully aware.

They parted, if only for Grelle to drop her gaze to the knot of Sebastian’s tie, pulling it undone with practiced fingers. Sebastian wondered if it was odd to meditate on the elegance of one’s hands. Grelle’s hands were just that, elegant. Long, slender, delicate, even. Sebastian was a demon, he was used to singling out a person’s insecurities. It was not hard to deduce that Grelle feared being perceived as masculine. Her hands, however, were no such thing. Well maintained, though worn with evidence of use, even with her favoured leather gloves, her nails long, painted with lacquer, each cuticle pushed back.

It was indeed probably bizarre to think so deeply on one’s hands.

Well, Sebastian was a demon, and when did they ever give thought to mortal standards of normalcy?

Grelle’s scarlet lips tugged at the corner, pulling down into a frown, her brow twitching in irritation. She tossed his tie to the side, barely restraining herself from popping the buttons of his collar. Sebastian opened his mouth, to question her on her bad attitude on such a fine evening, but she addressed it before the first syllable could exit his lips.

“William is running me ragged.” She says, voice coloured with distaste. “To berate me, berate my character and then turn around and work me like a dog. I am good at my job, he knows that, but sometimes I think he wishes to see me fail, to undermine every little thing — ” Grelle's sentence cut short, her breath catching as she remembered herself.

These little rendezvous, they were no strings attached. No feelings. No affection. Her emotions had gotten the better of her, a weakness, a flaw. Grelle knew better than to show her underbelly to a demon, as fond as she was of Sebastian. It was uncharacteristic. His eyes narrowed on her.

“The point is:” She drawled, regaining her posture once more, “I need to let off a little steam, and I want you to fuck me properly. You can do that, can’t you, Bassy?”

Continued on Ao3

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nishikiigoi

2 months ago

Polaris Identity Theory

Manga spoilers under the cut.

Because Toboso conceals his face, Polaris is probably a character who readers would recognize.

Polaris has claimed on multiple occasions to be a butler, and said that he lost his previous master. This might lead one to assume he was a butler in Vincent Phantomhive's household. However, Polaris appears to have a different chin shape compared to any of the previous butlers.

Polaris' first physical appearance is when r!Ciel comes to the townhouse. Soma opens the door, let's r!Ciel in, and offers him food because he believes him to be o!Ciel. R!Ciel shoots Soma with a small handgun, which is o!Ciel's signature weapon. When Agni tries to protect Soma, Polaris appears and stabs him with a knife, of which he has many. In this scene we see that Polaris is tall, but not as tall as Agni.

He is also incredibly strong and fast, performing maneuvers that would be impossible for a human, and as a result, impossible for a bizarre doll created from a human, as the bizarre dolls we've seen so far seem to retain the physical limitations of their human bodies.

Sebastian even remarks that killing Agni would have required more than 5 average humans.

The rest of the information we have about Polaris is very limited. In Japanese, he refers to himself using 私 (watashi) and uses uses polite sentence endings (desu and masu).

However, Polaris' most distinguishing characteristic is his devotion to his master. When confronted with the possibility of running out of blood and losing r!Ciel, he loses control, yells, stops using polite speech in Japanese, destroys his surroundings, and falls to his knees.

If Toboso were introducing a new character, she wouldn't need to hide his face. The only existing character who fits the profile of a butler, exceedingly devoted to his master, almost as tall as Angi, wielding an absurd amount of knives, and with strength and speed way beyond those of humans, is Sebastian.

When Polaris first stabs Agni in the townhouse, he seems to appear suddenly and unnoticed by Soma and Agni. The reader might assume that he came into the room or out of hiding at this moment to defend r!Ciel. However, I believe it to be more likely that he walked in with r!Ciel, unremarked-upon because if Ciel walks in, Sebastian would be expected to follow. In fact, it would be strange if the 13-year-old came in alone, without an adult, and especially without his near-constant companion.

At this point I will mention what originally made me think of this theory: Sebastian's catchphrase. I will do my best, with my extremely limited knowledge of Japanese, to explain.

The phrase Sebastian is so fond of saying is "私は[悪魔で]執事ですから." He's literally saying "For I am a devil and a butler," but doesn't blow his cover as a demon because it sounds identical to "For I am a butler to the end/persistently." (私は[飽くまで]執事ですから)

After freaking out over the possibility of losing r!Ciel, Polaris tells him and Undertaker that if r!Ciel died, "I wouldn't be able to rest, even if I died. I can't imagine where else I could be... for I am a butler, even in death."

私は[死んでも]執事ですから。

This is nearly identical to Sebastian's catchphrase, both saying "For I am a butler," with a single word (and its attached particle) swapped out:

私は(I)[ ]執事(butler)です(am)から(for)。

An obvious problem with this theory is that Polaris is loyal to r!Ciel, while Sebastian is loyal to o!Ciel. An even more obvious problem is that while Polaris is murdering Agni, Sebastian is with o!Ciel elsewhere. This is the point where my implausible theory reaches its peak of absurdity: I believe Polaris is a bizarre doll of Sebastian, specifically Sebastian the butler.

When Undertaker impaled Sebastian on the Campania, he obtained his cinematic record. Like when Grelle cut him with her death-scythe in the Red Butler Arc, Sebastian's record only shows memories of his current body and nothing before it manifested. The sole purpose of the body named Sebastian is to be the best butler and to serve his master. This could also explain the previous master Polaris lost and his insanity over losing another: the last memory of the body the cinematic record was taken from is seeing o!Ciel thrown over a railing and out of reach; Undertaker captured Sebastian's desperation in that moment and used it to create a bizarre doll.