I Love This :)
i love this :)
devil
(tw for self-harm. this is extremely self-indulgent. read at your own risk.)
Devil.
Her core, her soul, the very depth of her being, was a creature that had no right to see the light.
Usually, she could fight it. Usually, she could resist it. Usually, she could deny it.
But nighttime was when her demons were strongest, and she couldn’t always resist their allure. It was so easy to give into those voices, those whispers at the back of her mind that assured her that these actions were necessary for her survival. The devil inside of her had kept her alive for this long, so why would it ever try to deceive her now?
Nevertheless, as Rika looked down at the blood welling on her soft, thin, porcelain skin, she slowly came to realize that for once, her devil might have grown a little too strong.
A sharp wail escaped her lips, and the offender dropped from her hand to the floor with a clatter. She immediately clamped her free hand over her mouth, trying to muffle her cries. She couldn’t, shouldn’t, wouldn’t accept this. She could brush it off. She could pretend it never happened.
She hadn’t ever imagined that her devil would take a tangible form, but it had left a kiss on her wrist that she couldn’t ignore.
“Rika?”
A voice sounded from outside the bathroom door, followed by a sharp knock. The sound managed to strike Rika’s core, piercing even through her foggy mind and her shaky body. Hastily, the blonde ran her hands underneath the sink, eager to wash away the evidence. Rinse, rinse… Maybe a splash of soap, to ensure she was effectively clean. She needed to scrub away the darkness that she tried so desperately to keep hidden.
But as she pumped the soap onto her tender skin, the stinging that resulted made her whimper despite herself.
“Rika?” the voice called again, a little more frantically this time. “It’s me, V. Are you okay?”
Rika began to scramble through the drawers and cabinets, knowing that somewhere, somehow, the couple must have had a first aid kit in here. V was cautious—almost overly so—and every time that Rika complained she felt ill, whether it was a physical or emotional pain, her lover always seemed to be able to withdraw some sort of medicine to soothe her, some sort of bandage to patch her up.
She usually refused, not wanting to mess with her mind or body in the slightest, but for once, she was willing to accept the fact that she needed assistance. Normally, she wanted to keep that devil alive and well, strong enough to defend her from whatever the world may throw at her.
This time, though, that savior inside her had betrayed her, and she needed to bring it back within her power.
“Rika!”
“I-I-I… I need…” She tried to sputter out some words, some sort of answer to V to let him know that she was alive and well.
Was she really well, though?
“… a m-m-moment,” she stammered at last. She thought the sentence came from her, anyway; that voice sounded like it belonged to her, but in her dazed mind and through her ringing ears, pounding with the vibrations of her intense heartbeat, it felt so far away, as though it were coming from somewhere else.
V didn’t respond to that; he fell silent, finally, and all that Rika could hear was a soft exhale. He must have been relieved that she had answered, as distorted and shaky as it was, and so he was willing to give her the space she needed until she was ready once again. He was always so considerate of her, always trying to appease her darkness and bathe her in a glowing light.
Normally, her devil resented that light, that glow, that searing heat… but Rika, for once, was grateful to know the sun was right outside her door, ready to banish away the demons that had overpowered her.
A little bit of pressure was all it took to stop the bleeding, and finally Rika allowed herself to crack the door open. She waved at him with her dominant hand, keeping the other one tucked behind her back. “I… I saw a bug.” Some woman’s voice was trying to excuse the shrieking that had taken place, and deep down, Rika knew that this feeble fib would never convince him. She wanted to be hopeful, though. She didn’t want anyone—not even V—to know the extent of her struggles.
But as V’s minty gaze flickered to her hidden hand, to the razor on the floor, and finally to the swelling around the young woman’s eyes, he looked as though he’d managed to piece together exactly what had taken place in here.
“It’s okay.”
How could two simple words break her down?
Rika at once leaned forward and buried her face in his chest, sniffling and sobbing. Her tears were soaking into his shirt, but he didn’t seem to mind. The young man just ran a hand through her soft curls and pulled her in at the waist, massaging little circles into the small of her back. “You don’t have to be strong for me, Rika.”
With a whimper, she lifted her head and gazed up at him with tearful emerald eyes. “I… She… I…” Who should she blame? Was this the doing of Rika, or of… something else entirely?
No, this was Rika. This was a part of her that she tried so desperately to keep hidden. The part of her that V had tried to kill, time and time again, by trying to force her to expose it and unravel it.
But right now, Rika was willing to throw herself into his arms, if only to hear the words she so desperately needed to hear.
“I love you, Rika. Nothing you do will ever change that.”
Could she trust his words?
At this moment, did she have a choice?
“Let me see.”
Immediately Rika leaped back, cowering away from him, clutching her wound in her good hand and turning away so that he couldn’t get even a glimpse. “It’s fine…” she murmured, but as she removed her hand from her wrist and saw the little specks of blood that splattered her fingertips, she couldn’t fight back the sob that followed.
“Antibacterial cream and bandages,” V suggested softly, his voice barely above a whisper. “We have some in here.”
The blue-haired young man withdrew a small tube of ointment and a box of bandages from one of the drawers, and Rika cursed herself silently for not being able to find them sooner. Begrudgingly, she held her arm out to him, and upon seeing the subtle raise of his eyebrows and the softening of his gaze, she felt tears begin to brim along the corners of her eyes again.
“V, you need to promise me something,” she whispered as he began to rub the ointment into her skin. The pressure against her wound made her flinch, but she bit her lip and tried to keep herself steady. “You won’t tell anyone, especially not the RFA. Not even Jumin.”
Concern and doubt flickered across his eyes, but V nodded slowly. “You don’t want them to see you like this,” he guessed.
“I’m their sun, V.”
“Sometimes there’s a solar eclipse, Rika.”
Their silence coated the air for a moment as V gently stuck the bandage onto her wrist, careful to ensure he could cover the entirety of her injury. It was small, but significant. It was dainty, but deep.
Rika couldn’t fight back the gasp that slowly seeped out of her lungs as her lover gently applied his lips to the surface of the bandage. “You are my sun,” he whispered as he pulled back, and he gently took her hand in both of his. “Nothing you do will make me stop seeking your light.”
Light… even like this? Was there any light in her at all?
“I don’t understand you,” she grumbled. “I don’t understand how you could love a devil like me.”
“I’m not asking you to understand,” he told her simply. “I’m asking you to trust me.”
With a nod of her head and a dull ache in her chest,
Rika leaned into V’s warm, comforting embrace.
With the power of love, and after a quick rest,
Maybe, her demons she would be able to face.
More Posts from Nazusuki and Others
この涙 星になれ / ZARD
idk if anywhere else had this up either, so just in case again, here u go. enstars anime, ep 13. this is the rei and tsumugi ‘tickle tickle’ scene.
they are absolutely ridiculous! i love them
Getting serious for a moment this means nothing to anyone but peoplw make madakana so one sided which is special and painful but to some extent (specifically in regards to them caring about each other) untrue especially in it's current state they deeply care for each other you dont get it. It is very bittersweet and the time kanata spent sort of resentful of him was really good and really painful but he acknowledges him as his savior even if madara refused to its really good and bittersweet either way they are so important to each other as characters and as people and even in meteor impact after being almost cruel to him he still shows care for him in a way. Theres just something really wrong with both of them (which is so good) Whatever. Kicks rock
Hey! I'd love to hear your opinion on two things of the Halloween Mystic Messenger screen
First of all what do you think of Rika in the Dirndl (germans traditional women clothing) I think she looks quite snazzy, the colors are unusual on her but she looks gorgeous either way
Second of all, do you think Rika is Hänsel, Gretel, or the witch cause I am not sure. Like for the role she plays in the game, the witch would make a lot of sense, but she only gets out of her house after the children started eating her house, so I doubt it. And I forgot who was the one wanting to eat the house first of the siblings so I don't know 😭 I tried gaining understanding by looking at MC's clothes. But I have no idea what she is wearing, so I am at a loss and would love to hear your take on it!
Sending lots of love, dear <33
Hi! Thank you so much for such a in-depth ask, it was a ton of fun to sit and muse with my thoughts and ideas on Rika's birthday CG we got.
So, first of all, I gotta agree with you there: that's definitely a form of dirndl she's wearing! The designs look awfully similar for it to be a mere coincidence to me. These dresses can come in so different designs so it's a very versatile type of clothing to work with. Here are some examples of what I mean:
And here's Rika's dress up close for comparison:
Personally, I adore dirndls and their rustic yet elegant look. Never knew the specific term for such a dress, but now I do! It's not a sophisticated dress per se, but the simple beauty it brings out makes me super happy. If you think about it, it does fit Rika quite well. While she certainly loves to dress up every once in a while, her day-to-day style is quite modest in its nature. She's not wearing any dark colors in this cg, but it's not the pure white dress we saw on her two years ago either. To be honest, this color palette of green and blue on her makes me smile. It's not black or white, there's no darkness or light. At least, not in a way that would get your attention right away. She's not trying to embody the darkness or the light here. Instead, it's such a peaceful and soothing combination of colors, and I think it fits her very well. I also really like the yellow apron she's wearing! Is it, possibly, a callback to the dress we see on her in the game and the past she's trying to forget, only for it to remain by her side in one shape or another? Who knows, but it's a fun theory. Though, it should be noted that her outfit is still done in a cold color palette. It's certainly a way more colourful look on her than we're used to seeing, but in spite of all that, there's a certain type of deep melancholy surrounding her, even with a gentle smile brightening up her features.
Okay, now that we're done with her dress, let's talk symbolism! I'm gonna put up the whole CG now:
I'll be completely honest and say that it's been a while since I've read Hänsel and Gretel, so I had to quickly reread it to get a good feel of the story. It's very easy to assume that Rika's the witch leading MC away with the alluring promise of endless sweetness, only to trap them the moment they let their guard down. After all, the castle of Magenta sure does fit the sweet and inviting exterior of the witch's candy house pretty well. At first, it seems like a dream come true to the hungry and tired children, up until the very moment they finally get inside and see the ugliness hidden within these candy walls. That's what I thought of at first too! But, after rereading this story for your ask, I actually got another idea all together.
See, in the story, Gretel was wearing an apron. Not sure if she was wearing it from the very beginning, or after they finally freed themselves from the witch's clutches, but it's definitely there! And what do we see Rika wearing? That's right! An apron. Furthermore, I decided to look into the way Gretel is portrayed visually. To my surprise, she's often seen dressed in a classic dirndl. Which is actually not that surprising, since this story was published in 19th century in Germany, but hey, I didn't know that before :D Gretel was also the one leading Hänsel to the candy house, if I'm remembering it correctly.
So yes! Everything actually points to Rika being Gretel instead of a witch. Which means that MC is definitely Hänsel. This opens up a whole other possibility from a narrative standpoint. I wonder who the witch is then, though... But, I must admit, I REALLY like the idea of Rika initially helping the witch, albeit reluctantly and through her own tears, only to eventually find enough courage inside herself to break free and trick her, saving MC with her own hands. It's a nice parallel, considering that Hänsel (MC) was initially the one leaving pebbles and breadcrumbs to make sure that they'll return back home safe and sound. MC was also the one caring for Rika and promising her that everything will turn out okay.
Though, Rika still very much could be the witch, and I'm just looking way too deeply into this '^^ But, I must admit, I like the idea of her being Gretel much better. I want her to be happy!
Perhaps, Mika is the witch here. She's the one that first planted the idea for Mint Eye in Rika's head and she's the one telling her what to do for a short while. Mika playing the role of a witch that lured Rika and MC into her candy house only to force Rika to do her bidding does kinda fit the story. Maybe she locked MC up, because they were trying to warn Rika not to listen to her. I always loved the idea of MC knowing Rika before the start of the game, and how that would change up the narrative all together. I'd say that the father they return to in the end of the story is V, since he was the one genuinely caring for the kids, however his kind heart still did not stop him from unknowingly leading them to their doom. It does fit him quite well, I think. He's a good man doing his best and failing in the process, like we all do sometimes. Though, I have no idea who should be the evil mother... She's the one that quite literally abandoned Hänsel and Gretel in the middle of a forest, so... I don't know. I could go for a literal route and choose Rika's mother, but it's still feels kinda iffy and on the nose for it to make sense.
Collected Reading List for Hello Charlotte
I have collected every book either directly referenced (character names or bookshelves) or thematically relevant (that I can find. I am sure there are more.) in hc! Books marked with an * are the most relevant to the game/my personal recommendations. Notes under the cut.
One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest - Ken Kesey
The Kingdom of God Is Within You - Leo Tolstoy
Golden Apples of the Sun - Ray Bradbury
Physics of the Impossible - Michio Kaku
Physics of the Future - Michio Kaku
The God Delusion - Richard Dawkins
The Selfish Gene - Richard Dawkins
Bad Science - Ben Goldacre
Flatland - Edwin Abbott
On Aggression - Konrad Lorenz
Lullaby - Chuck Palahniuk
*Childhood’s End - Arthur Clarke
The Castle - Franz Kafka
Simulacra and Simulation - Jean Baudrillard
*1984 - George Orwell
Civilized Man’s Eight Deadly Sins - Konrad Lorenz
*Brave New World - Aldous Huxley
Cats Cradle - Kurt Vonnegut
1Q84 - Haruki Murakami
Fahrenheit 451 - Ray Bradbury
*Slaughterhouse 5 - Kurt Vonnegut
Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams
Time Machine - H.G. Wells
On the Freedom of the Will - Arthur Schopenhauer
The Man Who Mistook His Wife for a Hat - Oliver Sacks
The Joyful Wisdom - Frederich Nietzsche
Afficher davantage
Collected Reading List for Hello Charlotte
I have collected every book either directly referenced (character names or bookshelves) or thematically relevant (that I can find. I am sure there are more.) in hc! Books marked with an * are the most relevant to the game/my personal recommendations. Notes under the cut.
One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest - Ken Kesey
The Kingdom of God Is Within You - Leo Tolstoy
Golden Apples of the Sun - Ray Bradbury
Physics of the Impossible - Michio Kaku
Physics of the Future - Michio Kaku
The God Delusion - Richard Dawkins
The Selfish Gene - Richard Dawkins
Bad Science - Ben Goldacre
Flatland - Edwin Abbott
On Aggression - Konrad Lorenz
Lullaby - Chuck Palahniuk
*Childhood’s End - Arthur Clarke
The Castle - Franz Kafka
Simulacra and Simulation - Jean Baudrillard
*1984 - George Orwell
Civilized Man’s Eight Deadly Sins - Konrad Lorenz
*Brave New World - Aldous Huxley
Cats Cradle - Kurt Vonnegut
1Q84 - Haruki Murakami
Fahrenheit 451 - Ray Bradbury
*Slaughterhouse 5 - Kurt Vonnegut
Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams
Time Machine - H.G. Wells
On the Freedom of the Will - Arthur Schopenhauer
The Man Who Mistook His Wife for a Hat - Oliver Sacks
The Joyful Wisdom - Frederich Nietzsche
Afficher davantage
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pfp creds nitoenjoyer on x— ୨୧multifandom + jus appreciating art here:)18+ stuff here, you have been worned
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