Stanford Pines: OSHA’s Worst Nightmare.

yo mr white can you sign my permission slip so i can go to the aquarium bitch

Listen guys, gals, nb pals, I cannot lie & say that any of the silly jokes I’ve posted are intentional. They’re not. I post shit purely bc I think it’s funny. It’s just a very pleasant bonus that you guys like the dumb shit I post too.

just thought I'd leave this here.

we are all Colleen Caviello right now

Ppl online: omg Ford would have such a hard time getting used to cellphones

Ford: why is gas 4 dollars a gallon.

the universe: okay, you’re a human. I gave you free will and a conscious mind, so you’re free to do whatever you want. So what do you wanna do?

human: GO FAST

the universe: well, you’re a perfect pursuit predator but if that’s the way you want to evolve, go ahead.

human, climbing on a horse: GO FAST

the universe: wait what

human, inventing the carriage, the car and the bullet train: GO FASTER

the universe: I IMPLORE YOU TO STOP

human, trying to figure out lightspeed travel: FAS T ER

Happy Lunar New Year 🐍🥂🎆

Big mood

music music we make music

Im a freak in a fucked world 🌎🔫