Miracleracoon - Racoon On A Bridge

Steph:"my dad took over my hamster once i went back to college and ended up getting really attached and today he escaped and this goes to prove how truly pure my father is"

Texts between Steph and her dad about her hamster going missing. Padre:”Please call me a soon as you get this it's an emergency” Steph: “dad do not freak out it's just a hamster!! we will find him” Padre:”Oh my God I'm so sorry honey” “I'm so sorry l'm looking everywhere” “Im so wicked sorry I'II keep looking all day” “I Can't believe this.”

Padre:”This is the absolute worst ever” “I'm Never going to forgive myself if he doesn't come back” “Should I keep looking for him or is that going to scare him into hiding” “If I can't find him today I'm not going to work tomorrow so I can keep looking” Steph:”Dad- he's just a hamster i don't blame you at ALL. you shouldn't skip work you are a lawyer and he is a hamster”

Picture of a hamster enclosure with food and a ring of flour arranged around the food. Steph:”that looks good” “what's the white arc of bedding for? or is that bedding? what is that” Padre:”Flour So I can see his footsteps if he comes to get the food” Steph:”oh that's smart” Padre:”So I know he's still alive” Steph:”that's smart”

Padre:”I'm so sorry steph” “This is my biggest screwup ever. I will make it right” Steph:”No it's not” Padre:”I put him in his ball a whole bunch of times I should have double checked” “God is good I will trust him” “I know he likes peanut butter” “Peanuts” “That's a start”

Picture of Steph’s dad holding the hamster Steph:”OMG” “DID YOU GET HIM??” Padre:”Yes” “In his cage” “Are you effing kidding me”

Picture of the hamster jumping up towards Steph’s dad Padre:”The little bastard is trying to get out again” Steph:”arrest him” Padre:”This was the most stressful day in my life since I took the bar exam” “Night”

More Posts from Miracleracoon and Others

miracleracoon

6 months ago

no really, i must go. bye now!

(original under the cut)

Tags

cats minecraft love this

84K notes View Post

miracleracoon

2 weeks ago

Maomao after being thrown into that snake torture pit lmao

590 notes View Post

miracleracoon

6 months ago

102K notes View Post

miracleracoon

7 months ago

salt and pepper squid

they are in love

217K notes View Post

miracleracoon

6 months ago

192K notes View Post

miracleracoon

7 months ago

adhd paralysis sucks bcuz im just sitting there and my brain is like

YOU ARE WASTING TIME YOU ARE WASTING TIME YOU ARE WASTING TIME YOU ARE WASTING TIME YOU ARE WASTING TIME YOU ARE WASTING TIME YOU ARE WASTING TIME YOU ARE WASTING TIME YOU ARE WASTING TIME YOU ARE WASTING TIME

no work done no rest gained. literally no point of this at all

Tags

me irl im in this picture and i dont like it

146K notes View Post

miracleracoon

7 months ago

"drawing of the Lake Tanganyika Monster by Philippe Coudray for his book, Guide des Animaux Cachés"

ohmy god

6K notes View Post

miracleracoon

6 months ago

Boulders In Now Abandoned Dogtown, MA. In The 1930s Roger Babson Commissioned Unemployed Stonecutters

Boulders in now abandoned Dogtown, MA. In the 1930s Roger Babson commissioned unemployed stonecutters to engrave 35 boulders with “inspirational” phrases after the announcement of the stock market crash that would lead to the Great Depression.

15K notes View Post