And Now, A New One

Thank you! My family has always baked bacon (that was the inspiration for this XD)

Logan: I saw online today, someone freaking out about how you bake cookies and cook bacon.

Janus: Yeah, I never got that whole thing. I mean, you bake bacon.

Logan: ...Pardon?

Janus:

Janus: Do

Janus: Do you

Janus: Do you not bake bacon in the oven on a cookie sheet

Logan: No?? You fry it??

Janus: But it gets so crispy and nice ?? Why would you fry it???

Logan: *looks to Remus*

Remus: Don't look at me, I've had Janus's bacon. It's superior.

Logan: But that's not how it's done??? No bacon recipe says to bake it?

Janus: Oh I don't follow recipes exactly

Logan: But thEY'RE RULES

Janus: I mean recipes are really just suggestions when you have enough experience

Logan: (head explodes because oh my god everything Janus makes tastes so good and he's not even using recipes—)

The beanless bois

Patterns: cut

Colors: matched

Bois: pinned together

Reference boi: ready

Special eyes for the special boi: Ready

Now for eyes and beans!

Patterns: cut

Colors: matched

Bois: pinned together

Reference boi: ready

Special eyes for the special boi: Ready

I just got reminded of this post and while the sentiment is still completely true, I don't identify as a trans boy anymore skdhksdh

I have since decided that basically I don't like gender (for myself, it's great for people who like it/want one) and don't want to participate in it

Me, years ago: If I want to be a Proper Trans Boy and be Respected By People then I must always be masculine and not wear dresses, or skirts, or makeup, or paint my nails—

The Internet:

So may I introduce to you,

The life-changing concepts of,

Toxic Masculinity

and

Femboys

Me, crying in joy, painting my nails, curling my eyelashes, wearing a dress because it is Too Damn Hot for shorts, self-esteem skyrocketing: Yeah go ahead

I find it entertaining that nearly every DSMP character is drawn as their minecraft skin instead of their actual looks (Phil, Sam, Techno, and Sapnap being a few obvious examples)

except Tubbo.

I have never seen an iteration of c!Tubbo with blond hair.

Like, for reference, this is his skin: (image from here)

And I have never seen a c!Tubbo drawing that doesn't have cc!Tubbo's brown hair. This isn't a bad thing! Just an observation.

(If you have blond c!Tubbo drawings, I would love to see them—)

Everyone reblogging this with some variation of 'poly pat' is so intensely valid

Good morning! I'd just like to point out:

[Patton]: First, we'll need someone to practice on...

[Logan]: But who?

[Patton]: Each other?

(After they all swear to tell the truth during the trial scene and Janus takes the bibles/misc objects back away)

[Patton]: Okay, so, we kiss now? Or...?

Bonus:

[Patton]: Aww, there's so much cool stuff they've done for us online, kiddos!

[Roman]: Oh yeah?

[Patton]: There's some really neato artwork of us all AND some writing as well! Say, what is a "ship"?

[Logan]: Seriously, Morality, you don't know what that is? It is a craft designed for water travel.

[Virgil]: Even Prince knew that.

[Roman]: Yeah, even I knew that.

[Patton]: Oh, ok! It does not look like that, but ok.

I just want to point out those all happened in canon. That is all.

Thomas: *peacefully drawing*

Remus: Hey haha what if you like... Violently jerked your pen to the side

Thomas: ...Why?

Remus: Idk man it'd be fun just whoosh y'know

Remus: Like you could do it right now nothing's stopping you

Thomas: ...

Thomas: *violently jerks pen to the side*

Drawing: *is ruined*

Thomas:

Remus:

Remus: Yikes that wasn't a good idea was it

Thomas: Nope.

(Source: I just did this, rip my drawing of Patton lmao)

This makes sense too thank you science side of tumblr

The human memory is so weird.

Example: every single time I smell a bar of dove soap, I think of this one kid I used to go to school with. Now, I can't tell you his age. I can't tell you his favorite color. I can hardly tell you his first name.

But I remember that he always smelled like dove soap.

No matter what. It's like he carried dove soap around in his pockets. Just plain old dove white soap. And it was so strong but not overpowering— like, it wasn't a dove deodorant or something, it was like straight-up smelling a bar of dove soap whenever you were near him.

So now every time I smell dove soap he pops into my mind.

Why?

I can hardly remember my tumblr password sometimes, I forgot my own age a bit ago and had to use a calculator to figure it out. But no matter what, I remember this kid from fifth grade always smelled like dove soap.

Science side of tumblr please explain

Accidentally Walking In On A Side In The Shower: Janus Version

(There is a see-through glass shower door unless otherwise specified)

Janus: Where'd you put my hat?

Roman, having hung a towel over the glass shower door, knowing this would happen: I don't know what you mean.

Janus: You know I can tell when you're lying, right?

Roman, smugly: Yep.

Janus: Where’d— oh, god, sorry— *sinks out*

Patton, blushing red from head to toe, whispering: Did that just happen?

Janus: Where— nope— *sinks out*

Logan: ?

Janus: Where’d Roman put my hat?

Virgil, invisible behind a black shower curtain: *hiss*

Janus: *hisses back*

Janus: Did Roman tell you where he put my hat?

Remus, for once not wearing clothes like a normal person: No. I still think he took my morning star.

Janus: Hm. *starts to sink out*

Remus: Wh— wait! Is that it?

Janus: This isn’t a porn, Remus. I asked you a question, now I leave.

Remus: It could be…

Janus: No. It literally can’t.

Remus, sighing: I saw it in the freezer.

Janus: Thank you.

Remus, getting a new idea: If you get it out now, it might take a minute to defrost.

Janus: You’re stubborn, you know that?

Remus: :(

Janus: I’ll be right back

Remus: :D

Head & Shoulders comes out with a new product line, called Shoulders. The packaging is sleek and black, distinctly different from their easily recognizable signature white & blue style. Something for adults who get mocked by their peers for using Head & Shoulders. The tagline is: So No Head?