Bonus

Sometimes I fuck myself up thinking about how on the DSMP Technoblade became Ranboo's sensei, and then became (jokingly) distraught because the sensei always dies, and how in real life Ranboo wears the crown because viewers said they sounded like Techno and they said "if the crown fits, wear it" and then the two became friends, with Techno being an experienced streamer/youtuber and Ranboo being extremely new

And then, y'know

The sensei always dies

Everyone reblogging this with some variation of 'poly pat' is so intensely valid

Good morning! I'd just like to point out:

[Patton]: First, we'll need someone to practice on...

[Logan]: But who?

[Patton]: Each other?

(After they all swear to tell the truth during the trial scene and Janus takes the bibles/misc objects back away)

[Patton]: Okay, so, we kiss now? Or...?

Bonus:

[Patton]: Aww, there's so much cool stuff they've done for us online, kiddos!

[Roman]: Oh yeah?

[Patton]: There's some really neato artwork of us all AND some writing as well! Say, what is a "ship"?

[Logan]: Seriously, Morality, you don't know what that is? It is a craft designed for water travel.

[Virgil]: Even Prince knew that.

[Roman]: Yeah, even I knew that.

[Patton]: Oh, ok! It does not look like that, but ok.

I just want to point out those all happened in canon. That is all.

Roman, bursting into Logan's room in the middle of the night, sword raised: WHO IS ROBERTO AND WHERE DID HE COME FROM AND WHAT DOES HE WANT WITH PADRE?!

Logan, sleepily: He's the frog that lives in your head. G'night.

Roman, lowering sword: Oh, okay.

Roman:

Roman: waIT HE'S THE WHAT—

Remus and Logan: *playing Hell Chess*

Patton and Janus: *teleport in*

Janus: LOGAN! Tell Patton he does not have birds in his head!

Patton: Logan!! Tell Janus he doesn't know everything!

Logan, raising an eyebrow: What?

Patton: So, whenever my doctor examines my ears, these little birds tweet! He says I have a little family of birds living in my head!

Janus: Correction, to make Patton sit still during checkups, his doctor makes bird noises and pretends to check on birds in his head instead of his ears.

Patton: Hey, I'm perfectly still! I don't want him to poke a bird!

Janus: *gestures wildly at him*

Logan, completely serious: Oh, no, I'm afraid you're wrong here, Janus. I've seen Patton's medical records, he has a small family of birds living in his head and has for years. It's a harmless condition.

Janus: *stares at him in WTF manner*

Patton: Ha! I told you! Devon and his family ARE in my head!

Remus: What's in my head?

Logan, no hesitation: A single rat on a wheel. His name is Maurice.

Remus: Is he a space cowboy?

Logan: And a gangster of love.

Remus, grinning: Cool.

Patton: Ooh! What's in Roman's head?

Logan, also no hesitation: A frog named Roberto.

Patton: Awesome! I'm going to tell him.

Patton: *sinks out*

Janus: WHY.

Logan, smiling mischievously: You've got a transgendeer in yours.

Janus: MOTHERF—

Y'know how if there's a hot character in a movie/series/video game people will crush on them and idolize them?

"Then they're missing out. There is no video game character as cool as Frogger! Heck, he eats fly for breakfast... And trying to cross a busy road without losing his froggy life? Ooh! Talk about ribbiting."

Not saying LilyPaddton's got the hots for the Frogger frog, but... LilyPaddton's got the hots for the Frogger Frog.

Remus: Why do they call it the birds and the bees when talking about procreation between people? Birds and bees aren't mammals. They're nothing like people. Do you know how a bird or bee reproduces? I just know they both lay eggs. So like, what?

Logan: *scoff* They call it—

Logan: They call it...

Logan: WAIT HANG ON

Remus, proud of knowing something: Logan. I have a fact.

Logan, not looking up from his book: Proceed.

Remus: Male reindeers lose their antlers in the winter, while female reindeers don't. All of Santa's reindeers have antlers, meaning they're all female, but the media says they're men because they don't want a team of strong females depicted.

Logan: Or they aren't cis. Ever think about that?

Remus: Wait wha—

Logan: Maybe they're transgender. Don't be a bigot, Remus.

Remus: I'M NOT—

Remus: Wait—

Remus: Am I being a bigot???

Logan: I don't know, are you? You're assuming their gender aligns with their sex.

Remus: *now having a crisis*

Janus, walking past, unable to help it: So you could say they're... Transgendeer.

Logan, hopping up, beating Janus with a pillow: I'm trying to escape Patton's constant puns, goddamnit!

Same on the tentacles, holy shit on the art that's fantastic

Well, you could not expect that you will throw out the tea party with the theme of Mad Max and I will not draw Remus for this

I started watching the dream team smp. I've finished episode seven.

I have 82 hours, 30 minutes, and 36 seconds of it left. Roughly three days and ten and a half hours.

Now one of my favorite cosplayers is going to start doing dsmp cosplay.

Am I going to watch 82 and a half hours worth of mcyt to know what the hell is going on so I can continue to appreciate them and their work?

Y E S .

Au where Ranboo's memory is fine he just panicked when they asked him questions and said 'I don't know'

Now he's stuck in this lie and too awkward to admit his memory is fine

Imagine if spells could be cast to inflict you with any symptom, not just those of physical illnesses

Like, screw 'coughing fit' or 'fainting spell,' give me

Hocus pocus, leaping locust,

I cast curse of hyperfocus!

Or

Tic tac, bric-a-brac,

I hex thee: Panic attack!