This Is The Best Thing The Tumblr Gods Have Ever Allowed Me To Lay Eyes Upon

This is the best thing the tumblr gods have ever allowed me to lay eyes upon

Gonna Get Myself A Fun Little Surprise I Guess

Gonna get myself a fun little surprise I guess

More Posts from Magicunderstandsmyaddiction and Others

the thing that’s the most wild to me about any demographic of men thinking they are ontologically incapable of misogyny is that not even women are ontologically incapable of misogyny. you can be extremely marginalized and still be able to leverage misogyny to your advantage if there is even one woman or girl who ranks lower than you do in the gender hierarchy.

you would think everyone would learn this having been a child and seeing how the most marginalized girl you knew was treated at school. kids with almost no legal power at all can get away with assaulting a disabled girl, a black girl, a poor girl, a gay or bi girl, a trans girl, a girl from a family with a targeted faith practice in her country, an immigrant girl, a nonverbal girl. the social ladder people climb is girls who are collectively selected as Okay To Abuse.

alas, i lack both the chutzpah of a woman and a man's pizzazz

the point of living is in fact obsessing over art

"forgive and forget" WRONG! go to hell

How Izutsumi Evades Attacks

how izutsumi evades attacks

West Bengal Miku

West Bengal Miku

I based her off me lol

Have You Ever Been To Earth?

Have you ever been to earth?

On earth, we use the word “burrito” to describe a tortilla filled with things you eat. Pretty simple stuff, and I’m surprised you at least got that part right. My burrito was, in fact, filled with food. In this, you and I agree and are friends. But this is also where my lifelong hatred begins for you and anyone else whose brain has been repeatedly scrubbed with the same mixture of bleach and Pop Rocks as yours has. Because that should have killed you, but left you around long enough to do what you did to me today. Let me explain:

You’re an idiot.

Let me further explain:

Burritos are eaten from one end to the other. So that means when you assemble a burrito with motherfucking ZONES of ingredients going that direction, you create a disgusting experience for the burrito’s end user. When you make a burrito, you should put the ingredients in layerslengthwise. That way, every bite has AT LEAST A FUCKING CHANCE of getting at least two types of ingredients, and there is little chance of becoming almost hopelessly trapped in a goddamned cilantro cavern.

Have you ever eaten one of the things you make all fucking day? You should try one. They are pretty good WHEN YOU ARE NOT WILLING YOURSELF THROUGH THE FUCKING EMPIRE OF SOUR CREAM ONLY TO END UP IN LETTUCE COUNTRY.

When you eat a burrito, you don’t stand it up and bite down on it lengthwise like a fucking Rancor. Humans can’t usually dislocate their jaws, and I’m not a fucking pelican. But you must think that’s how it’s done, since that would be THE ONLY FUCKING WAY to take a bite of your crapstrosity and have it taste like a burrito.

And guess what else, player? You probably can’t guess anything, because I’m pretty sure you’re just a mop with a hat on it that fell over and spilled some shit into a tortilla, but just in case, here’s what:

Humans also don’t eat burritos like fucking corn on the cob. Like a fucking typewriter from one end to the other a little at a time and then DING next line. But today I wish I had tried that. Because at least THEN I would be able to eat some rice, then beans, then be all like HEY BEANS I’LL BE RIGHT BACK JUST GOING OVER HERE TO THE GUACAMOLE FOR A SECOND.

Nope.

My experience was more like HEY BEANS IT’S JUST GOING TO BE YOU AND I FOR A MINUTE UNTIL I CAN FUCKING EXCAVATE THE RICE FROM BENEATH YOU BUT BY THEN YOU WILL BE A FADING MEMORY OH HEY I WAS WRONG I’M IN THE FUCKING CHEESEOSPHERE NOW RICE MUST BE NEXT I HOPE IT’S NOT ANOTHER FUCKING SALSA POCKET.

You built this thing like a fucking pack of LifeSavers.

And don’t even fucking think I’m about to open this shit up and re-engineer your nonsense 90 degrees. I ALREADY PUT A HOLE IN IT WITH MY FUCKING MOUTH. YEAH. THAT’S HOW I DISCOVERED YOU FUCKING SUCK AT LOOKING AT THINGS. I AM NOT GOING TO DO FUCKING TORTILLA ORIGAMI TO GET THIS SHIT BACK TOGETHER, ONLY TO END UP WITH A BURRITO THAT’S BEEN SHOT IN THE GUT AND IS BLEEDING YOUR INEPTITUDE.

What’s that? I should ask you to mix it up first next time? IS THIS JAMBA JUICE? I DON’T WANT TO DRINK MY FUCKING BURRITO THROUGH A BENDY STRAW, AND I DON’T WANT A PILE OF BURRITO SOUP IN A FLOUR CAN.

I just want a burrito.

In conclusion:

You’re the worst thing that has ever happened to the universe, you owe everyone everywhere an apology for this burritobomination, and I hope your babies look like monkeys.

UPDATE FOR EVERYONE WHO SAID “JUST EAT IT WITH A FORK”:

A fucking fork?

I DIDN’T ORDER THE FUCKING COBBURRITO SALAD.

If anyone ever handed me a burrito with a fork, THEY WOULD BE WEARING A BRAND NEW BURRITO HAT FROM MY FALL COLLECTION TEN SECONDS LATER.

That’s like buying a car and having them hand you a fucking wrench with the keys. Like YEAH WE KNOW THIS MOTHERFUCKER’S GOING TO EXPLODE AND BE SPREAD ACROSS EIGHT LANES AS SOON AS YOU HIT THE GAS, BUT SHIT, WE GAVE YOU A WRENCH, SO BE COOL.

Jesus already gave me two burrito forks. One at the end of each arm. They’re called fucking HANDS.

A fork. My god. I haven’t cried since I was six, but I’m fucking sobbing now.

People eat burritos with forks?

God is sorry he made us.

(Source)

I Think It Takes A While For Them To Talk About Everything
I Think It Takes A While For Them To Talk About Everything

i think it takes a while for them to talk about everything

i love thinking about body language esp with these two, i think when they first try to be there for each other they keep their hands to themselves lmaoo.

deku is so stubborn and loves to pretend he's fine so he's not gonna go in for a hug (which is why he hugs himself) but also, he needs some contact when he's anxious so he kind of leans into bakugo and they just sit like that for a while they're so unserious.

i think bakugo is even worse (he lovess to shove his hands into his pockets) and needs to be pulled into some physical contact (he needs it too when he feels queasy).

i like to draw them hugging and such but i think it takes a while for them to get there as teens, eventually they're familiar enough with each other's body language to know when the protest against being pulled into a hug is serious or not and they would respect each other's boundaries <3

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magicunderstandsmyaddiction - rotting; sum of my life
rotting; sum of my life

-she/her PLEASE TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT MY RAMBLES

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