Hi There!

Hi there!

I don't know if you've talked about this in a previous post, so please forgive me if this is a redundant question, but you mentioned - in the post about how Fyodor seems to be mimicking Dazai's mannerisms post-Meursault - that Dazai sees himself in Atsushi.

It wasn't the point of that post, but I was very intrigued by what you said, since they're not typically seen as similar characters. I've thought about Dazai seeing Odasaku's traits in Atsushi's, but himself I've never considered.

I would love to hear your thoughts on the matter, if you are comfortable.

Also, I love reading your BSD character analyses! Have a lovely day!

Of course I don't mind explaining!

CW for mentions of suicide and child abuse

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When I say Dazai sees himself in Atsushi, I don't mean in a "We act the same and have the same world views" kind of way, but more of a Dazai understands the way Atsushi feels about himself because he feels very similar. It's not exactly the same as how Dazai feels now, but I believe he's asked a lot of the same questions about himself that Atsushi does.

Take the first chapter where they are in the warehouse together.

Atsushi talks about himself as if he's worthless and matters to no one else, therefore he should just disappear. Dazai doesn't respond, but this look he has, to me, is recognition.

We know that as a teenager Dazai attempted to end his life, resulting in him meeting Mori. It's very easily plausible to me that Dazai had these same thoughts as Atsushi, that they eventually morphed into how he idealizes suicide in the current manga.

He doesn't tell Atsushi not to feel these things, or that he's wrong because Dazai understands what it's like to go through such self-loathing and how a stranger telling you not to feel that way doesn't really help. However, I do think this is the moment he decides to help Atsushi. To share the weight of his darkness just like Oda and Ango did for him.

There's also the fact that Dazai is the one to help Atsushi through his emotions when the Director dies. I, again, believe it's because Dazai understands Atsushi's complex emotions around the Director.

Again, we see him telling Atsushi that his feelings aren't wrong. All of them.

The anger, the hatred and yes, even the aching loss he so badly wants to deny. Dazai tells him it's okay to feel all those things at once and it's okay to cry over it. Because he wouldn't be crying over the Director, he's be crying for himself, for the little boy who didn't get the love and protection he should of and was instead stuck with such an abusive man.

I think Dazai understands this because of Mori and his own complex feelings around him. Dazai hates Mori, but he can't escape the influence he had over his teen years, over who he is today and the lessons he imparted on him. There was a time where Mori was the only person who had ever told Dazai it's okay to the way he is. He can only hate Mori as much as he does because at one time, he didn't.

I doubt Dazai actually views Mori as a father, the same way Atsushi never viewed the Director as his father, but it's the word that most easily describes both of complex feelings around them.

Dazai sees the lost and alone boy he was in Atsushi and he wants to help him in a way he was never helped.