Zeus: Guys, There’s A Monster Under My Bed And It’s Really Ugly.

Genie: I shall grant you three wishes.

Hades: I wish my dog could talk!

Genie: Done!

Hades, patting Cerberus: Hey, buddy, you've got two wishes!

Hades: ALL RIGHT LISTEN UP YOU LITTLE SHITS

Hades: Raven, not you, you’re an angel and we’re happy to have you here.

Queen + (some) big hits by each member

warmup doodles from twitter

Nikias: Romeo and Juliet is a love story, right?

Hades: Romeo and Juliet is NOT a love story. It is a tragedy about how young love is stupid and shortsighted.

Lucifer: Romeo and Juliet is indeed a tragedy, but the love between the two stars is not stupid or shortsighted - it is genuine and beautiful. The tragedy comes from the fact that the rivalry between the Capulets and the Montagues destabilizes their community and kills two innocent kids who loved each other.

Theo: Mercutio is gay.

Persephone: Stop spending money on stupid stuff.

Hades: Okay

[later]

Persephone: What the hell?

[Cerberus walks by in a tuxedo]

Hades: He's getting married.

“About 1969, I opened a stall in Kensington Market, which was one of the hippest places in London. I used to run it with this bloke, Freddie, who I knew because he regularly came to see Smile, the band Brian and I were in at the time. Me and Fred used to sell old Edwardian clothes and scarves that he picked up from various nefarious dealers. Back then, I didn’t really know him as a singer—he was just my mate. My crazy mate! If there was fun to be had, Freddie and I were usually involved.” - Roger Taylor 

john: i wanna be taken out

brian: like, on a date or by a hitman?

john: either one would be fine

Zeus: my sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand