Littlewing-52 - Where The FUCK Is The Bat Signal

Batman: The Brave and the Bold #19, Robin (2021) #5

Dick and Babs give Bruce one grandchild and bro clocks out he said “this is my life now 💕” being a peepaw literally fixed him

“your rent should be a third of your income” well wouldn’t that be nice. wouldn’t it. lower the rent pussy

The next time Jason says Bruce did nothing when he died, I want him to be cut off with the declaration that Bruce did. Bruce did everything. Superman almost wasn't able to hold him back.

Bruce wanted the Joker dead. He shot down his damn helicopter even with Bruce still in it. He wanted to see the Joker's body and finally know his boy didn't have to worry about another innocent person being caught in the Joker's crossfire. Even from the grave, he knew Jason would worry. He'd never stopped. Not once. Not even broken and bleeding did Jason stop worrying about someone else (even driven wild with Pit Madness, he still had worried about the kids in Crime Alley).

I need Jason to know how much Bruce loved him, to the point of almost starting WWIII. I need him to know the desperation in Bruce's eyes. How his hands shook and it wasn't with the horror of seeing himself sink further into the dark of The Bat. I need Jason to know the day he died was the day a piece of Bruce died with him. I need Superman to tell Jason about how little he'd recognized his friend, trying to talk sense into the man everyone had known as the Pillar; The rock in the typhoon. I need Tim to tell Jason how the scars got on his hands; From catching Bruce's gauntlet too often. "That's enough." He'd say, sounding older than he was. The gauntlets were sharp (to cut rope in the event of capture, or tanglement). The purse snatcher would be in critical condition but he'd live.

I need Jason to know Bruce did everything. Even things he shouldn't have done. Things he would be ashamed of later on, praying to the shadows of his room that his sons would heal. Not forgive him, but heal. (Bruce never quite learned how to heal, did he? He only knew how to fight. All his kids could tell you that. Fighting for them or against them, chasing back the nightmares or becoming his own. Bruce knew how to fight in many ways, but he never got the hang of looking at his demons and letting them go.)

I need Jason to know Bruce loved him.

Dick Grayson:

*runs the titans*

*works for the league*

*has a day job*

*solo patrols bludhaven*

*solo patrols New York*

*on call 24/7 for regularly scheduled Gotham crisis(es)*

*training at least 40% of new gen heroes at any given moment*

*infiltrating the current annoying cult, corrupt gov, spy organization, company, mafia group, evil underground ancestral foundations of a city and random corrupt modeling industry*

*monitoring drug pedaling in 3 cities*

*emotionally regulating 80% of his family bc why would they do it themselves? Nah let’s just ruin relationships for fun -cough Bruce cough-*

* maintaining civilian cover*

*canonically does volunteer work*

I am beginning to think nightwing doesn’t have anger issues he’s just overstimulated bc wtf

Like Dick take a break what is this?

————

Dick currently working on infiltrating the mob, after 4 days of 6+ hour patrols bc bludhaven has no chill an Arkham breakout, a performance review at work that took too long, organizing a titans outer space mission, just got back from training Jon Kent: no one call me plz god no one call me I can’t do this I have so much work no one. Call me plz

*phone rings* -it’s tim

He could ignore it but last time he left Tim alone for a month the dumbass lost his spleen and decided a cowl was a fashion choice (equally bad in his opinion)

Dick picking up the phone with his non broken arm: yello

Tim: so I accidentally maybe got kidnapped and maybe also started a cult around the concept of Batman and I’m out of energy drinks. (All equally dire in tims opinion)

Dick popping 4 caffeine pills: shut up I’ll be there in 30 don’t DO ANYTHing.

—————

Jason: sooo I might be engaged to an alien princess

Dick about to pop a Xanax: tell me it’s Kori or at least in this galaxy

Jason: nope

Dick: …. Can it wait

Jason: she wants to eat me, their species is like a praying mantis knockoff but with space and mind control.

Dick: yeah okay give me an hour I’ll call raven

————

Damian: hello Richard

Dick: what did you do.

Damian: I have been kidnapped by my mother

Dick: again

Damian: I feel it would be redundant to say anything

Dick: …….. alright I’ll call the nearest flying hero be there in a bit… keep ur spine where it is Damian or I swear to god-

——————

Bruce: cult

Dick who just got done with an undercover mission: anddd?

Bruce: we need someone to infiltrate it

Dick: I swear to god I. will. hurt. you

Bruce: hnnnn

——-

Babs: I have… acquired a child

Dick who is fighting deathstroke : …okayyyy

Babs who is watching the fight: she’s a little bit … traumatized

Dick, dodging a katana: preaching to the choir

Babs: can you do your whole, human empathy and kindness tell me ur life story I have puppy dog eyes.

Dick: ….

Babs: you owe me

Dick: … one day I will delete all your numbers and disappear

Babs cheerfully: you know no matter where you go I can find you hunk wonder see you in 3 hours don’t die before then!

I've been giving my little sister little forehead kisses because she's just the right height for them so like I really like to think of Dick doing the same to Tim any chance he gets (it's like an impulsive thought that he acts upon) he started doing it just for the reaction but after a while he just gives forehead kisses as a sign of affection, thanks for this Ted talk<3

Death Note AU where hbomberguy makes a five hour long video about youtuber Light Yagami that's initially completely unrelated to the murders (Light would probably plagiarize or have really unhinged right-wing political takes if he was on youtube)

but halfway through he reveals that while researching he stumbled upon evidence that Light might be behind the Kira murders, and then spends like fourty minutes explaining the concept of a shinigami, an hour explaining how he thinks Light used one to commit murders, and then another hour explaining Light's ideology and why the concept of criminals being inherently evil is flawed

He finishes the video by addressing Light directly and telling him that he (Hbomberguy) had his name legally changed before uploading the video, to something that only he knows, making it impossible for Light to kill him

Star Trek: Deep Space Nine "Past Tense, Pt. 1"

It's so wild when you think about how much of a shift the batkids had after they were adopted by Bruce, because NONE had a sibling and were like-

Dick, who accidentally walked into Tim's room, spotting the robin shrine he has there:

Tim: ...I can explain

Dick, walking out: Nevermind! It's my fault for wishing for siblings when I was a kid

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jason: Who the hell tweeted 'skibidi toilet rizz' 56 times from my twitter?!

Tim, salty about the titans tower incident, laptop in hand still open to Jason's twitter account:

Jason:

Jason: I wish Bruce had adopted a puppy instead of you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Damian, fuming after Bruce got them a shared hotel room on a vacation: I miss the days when I was an only child

Tim: Didn't your mom make like two thousand clones of you?

Damian: I would've preferred sharing my inheritances with all 2000 of them instead of you

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dick, entering his room at the manor after a patrol and spotting Duke on his bed and immediately shrieking: BRUCE, THERE'S A RANDOM KID IN MY ROOM

Bruce: Dick, this is your newest brother, Duke

Dick: And you gave him my room?!

Duke: Wow, the colour scheme in here is so 80s

Dick: Consider me and you estranged from now on

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bruce: Jason, unblock your brother, he is currently crying in the living room because of it.

Jason, had blocked Dick after the thirst trap Dick posted got over 100k views on tiktok and now everyone and their sibling was asking for Dick's number: What brother? I identify as an only child.