-t.f.s.

Let the oceans wash away my guilt,

to the one that I rely on,

the one I felt so deep on,

this hand as my guidance,

this spirit as my home,

I feel them for once and last of all..

In a moment

silence broke

all the wishes,

it broke a path,

a stone of dreams,

hopes that lie on

my garden of peace.

Feels like terrible wedding

Where my heart's not invited

And eyes see nothing..

Toasts on barely lasting love,

groans of pleasure, in devor,

the day ends in defeat,

silence just fell asleep.

Everything visible

faded out of me.

-t.f.s.

What it means to be needed.

" Love means searching for your comfort zone such as your skin, your hair, your voice, your hand. It means so much just like warmth has come down on greeting the earth. "

-t.f.s.

Life is a line you shouldn't cross when you're downwards. As if in matter of fact you've already given up. It's not your fault for being who you are,it's your fault for not seeing the best part of it because YOU make it the best. When sun rises,you go down and think otherwise "what else is left for me now?" And when moon rises, your inner self just rises with night too. You create sudden conversations with yourself seeing the case of the problem that's gotten into your soul and it's making your skin tremble nervously. When your thoughts play chess and don't give up on hitting you, your dreams seem to be a broken mirror. But they aren't because it's an illusion. Your mind develop your self-mirror in which everything is illusion but one is real- yourself. You're alive with heart still beating. Don't give up to have another beginning. Don't waste time for useless thoughts. Don't give reason for illusion to eat you up.

-t.f.s.

Will is not broken

Even through darkness

Through hallways of death,

Through rage and pain,

Sickness in vain ,

It is easier to open a door

rather than unleash fears.

-t.f.s.

where can I find a lover? someone I can stare at the stars with, or have crazy discussions about literature til 1 am with? a boy who writes me love letters and reads me poetry with his head on my lap. someone to walk around museums with, and then tells me that my beauty doesn’t compare to statues or paintings. where do you get one? 

ABSOLUTION-THE CALL.

suffer.

the moon gazes upon the quiet

fearful and dark city where

the screams are loud and strain,

awfullness continues in the streets

life is an incredible disease.

ocean waves come closer to the city,

it smells like death,it's poison,

none of them has seen what's

born inside in a hole

yet none of them(humans) will live long...

...no one will ever feel how deadly was this challenge,

no one could ever kill the absolute that lives and it will ever live on earth.

suffer.

those eyes don't hide the pure desire to kill and eliminate.

fear.

it smacks you down to give up and die in tears.

disease.

it's like the madness taking all over the world,

making chaos miserable to handle.

surviving doesn't exist when the end comes,

when the doors of Hell open,

when a sound appears...

...and the ocean rebels

to it's RELEASE..

-t.f.s.

there is no safe place

even night is bright as day

the hypocrite hides

the judge will be judged

live by the sword die by it

same amount weighed out

inside or outside

a reflection of the self

mirror images

©Johnny J P Lee

14 December 2023

Haiku: 5-7-5

Photos: J. P. Lee

SEPTEMBER

song of the simple truth: the complete poems - julia de burgos / a september day - george henry / excerpt from a letter to aurelia plath - sylvia plath / french autumn - artem tolstukhin / earthquake weather - janice gould / blue shutters - kim english / a girl ago - lucie brock-broido / little women (2019) dir. greta gerwig / september garden party - jane kenyon / constanze saemann and charlotte foubert photographed by ryan brabazon / september 1st - dante émile

Notes to myself.

Killing the happiness

is like killing an animal

or nature that gives

hundred of lives.

My ideas are illusion

and illusion makes me company

after I lose my confidence.

Whatever I am, whoever I was

is the past that I've re-written.

There's a new flesh bleeding

In my cells in divine,

whatever needs to be finished,

my past will lay in pieces.

-t.f.s.

For another sad human without a realization.

Circle of substances.

Body being accumulated

shot in a deadly dream

songs are playing in grave

Words filled with blood

whisper to my universe

myths i couldn't hear,

Like an acid in my body

the whole world destroys me,

it eats me and never swallow

chewing me like a gum

to welcome nightmares

at my mind's door.

It happened again,

one night,million times,

they enter infinity.

Those cut wrists,

lips swollen

death is coming

to a near end.

"End is

beginning,

beginning is

the end."

-Voices repeat.

-t.f.s.