Lalamei

quotes that help me survive:

“You are not lost. You are here. Stop abandoning yourself. Stop repeating this myth about love and success that will land in your lap or evade you forever. Build a humble, flawed life from the rubble, and cherish that. There is nothing more glorious on the face of the earth than someone who refuses to give up, who refuses to give in to their most self-hating, discouraged, disillusioned self, and instead learns, slowly and painfully, how to relish the feeling of building a hut in middle of the suffocating dust.” — Heather Havrilesky, Ask Polly

this tumblr text post:

“To live in this world you must be able to do three things: to love what is mortal; to hold it against your bones knowing your own life depends on it; and, when the time comes to let it go, to let it go.” — Mary Oliver

From an interview with Kazu Makino:

Instructions On Not Giving Up, Ada Limon:

And this poster by Yumi Sakugawa

“You have to believe, in your heart, that even if you don’t work hard and exercise and think positive thoughts and make new friends and march triumphantly into the future, you are still enough. You will always have bad days. Being broken doesn’t make you a loser. You can crumble, and you will still be enough. Make that your religion moving forward. You are here to feel this moment. You are not here to become someone better. You are not here to impress or compete. You are not here to prove yourself. You are here to savor this life. Let down your guard. You are already enough. Believe it.” — Heather Havrilesky

“The first feminist gesture is to say: “Ok. They’re looking at me. But I’m looking at them.” The act of deciding to look, of deciding that the world is not defined by how people see me, but by how I see them.” -Agnès Varda

lyrics from the song Grow by The Oh Hellos:

“The world’s otherness is antidote to confusion, that standing within this otherness—the beauty and the mystery of the world, out in the fields or deep inside books—can re-dignify the worst-stung heart.” — Mary Oliver

“I hope you will go out and let stories, that is life, happen to you,and that you will work with these stories from your life--not someone else's life--water them with your blood and tears and your laughter till they bloom, till you yourself burst into bloom. That is the work. The only work.” — Clarissa Pinkola Estes

i can be obsessed with romance and also be totally fine on my own it’s called having depth and dimension and being in denial

“Chanel in Harajuku" photographed by Fish Zhang for Dazed 30th Anniversary issue. Styled by Shotaro Yamaguchi. Hair by Keiko Tada. Glam by Yuka Hirac. 

Models: Celine, Chelsy, Hyou Kogou (Stanford), Kyoya Miyauchi (Friday), Mao (Tomorrow Tokyo), Mayu (SOS), Momoi Kazune (Bark in Style), Nami, Senping (bravo), Ura (Be Natural), Virgin Shen.

I love my energy. I love being sweet, kind, light, gleamy, hair tucked behind my ear, pure, blushy, and soft spoken. But on the flip side I love being sexy, flirty, charismatic, magnetic, wild natural curls going every which way, outspoken, deep eye contact, and alluring

Thank you sm for tagging me! @sue-the-poemegranate

This or that

summer or winter // coffee or tea // straight hair or curly hair // fiction or nonfiction // necklaces or bracelets // Marshmallows or whipped cream // night in or night out // sunset or sunrise // pizza or pasta // cold drink or hot drink // vampire or werewolf // crop top or oversized hoodie // be able to fly or run at super speed // speak many languages or able to speak to animals // be invisible or read minds // phone call or text // Laundry or dishes // Pool or beach // flats or heels // Stay home or go out // coke or Pepsi // cook dinner or do dishes // books or movies // dogs or cats // Chocolate or Vanilla // Facebook or Instagram // Over-dressed or under-dressed // morning or late nights // always late or always early // dancer or singer // always eat only dessert or always eat only savoury // shopping or museum // art gallery or zoo // Parties or Picnics // white lights or multi-colored lights

Tagging @fai-rys @moonsetlover @hyeri-yah and @ whoever wants to do this !

I was getting so bored. So, I thought of making a small tag game. I hope you people will enjoy it. I took some help from Tumblr for a few options.

This or That

summer or winter // coffee or tea // straight hair or curly hair // fiction or nonfiction // necklaces or bracelets // Marshmallows or whipped cream // night in or night out // sunset or sunrise // pizza or pasta // cold drink or hot drink // vampire or werewolf // crop top or oversized hoodie // be able to fly or run at super speed // speak many languages or able to speak to animals // be invisible or read minds // phone call or text // Laundry or dishes // Pool or beach // flats or heels // Stay home or go out // coke or Pepsi // cook dinner or do dishes // books or movies // dogs or cats // Chocolate or Vanilla // Facebook or Instagram // Over-dressed or under-dressed // morning or late nights // always late or always early // dancer or singer // always eat only dessert or always eat only savoury // shopping or museum // art gallery or zoo // Parties or Picnics // white lights or multi-colored lights

Tagging : @thatshadylilbitch @ukiyowi @the-wild-candy @mistybreak @airas-magicshop @snowflakesluvu @royaleofury @sunkissedchld @eunoiatarot @etherealjaehyuns @ygkidling @pjmnoir @purple-winter @dazzletarot @daszlight @the-falling-star @athena-swords and anybody else who wishes to join.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ astrum's the secret history & henry winter thirst masterlist ⋆｡°✩

hi, all! because we are slowly but surely approaching the 200 posts mark and this blog hasn't even been up for a full month, i've decided to provide all those who are new to my page a handy tool to facilitate orientation. when you expand this post, you will be greeted with a summary of all of my original posts and asks regarding the topic of my blog — incessant, tenacious, shameless thirst for the secret history's very own henry marchbanks winter.

admittedly, i am a complete sucker for lists and organizational tools, which is why this will simply be a heavenly experience for me — even more so because i'm currently procrastinating writing my term paper. however, without much further ado — find the list below the cut.

-> IMPORTANT NOTE: due to the link limit on this post, i can no longer expand it to my liking. because i don't want to create a second masterlist (just yet), however, you will find any newer uploads linked in my own reblog of this post (look in the notes).

˚₊· ❥ general — sfw, informative, personal

my opinion on tsh / addressing the problematic aspects of tsh / henry's middle name being 'marchbanks' and a possible explanation / what henry might've whispered to camilla / my opinion on whether or not henry and camilla were in love / my fancast(s) for henry / my favorite books / my opinion on dorian gray as a character (+ parallels with tsh) / comparing henry to marble statues / modern media henry would be into / elaboration on camilla macaulay / will i be writing about other tsh characters? / tips on getting into classical studies / country house daydreams

˚₊· ❥ henry winter nsfw scenarios

general headcanons about henry's sexual preferences / summer thigh riding / car sex / study date sex / mating press position with henry / riding henry / scratching his back during intimacy / bondage with henry / henry being into bdsm / henry's dirty talk part one / henry's dirty talk part two / neck teasing & biting / henry and cnc / dumbification with henry / henry sucking his partner's fingers / sucking henry's fingers / henry & cigarettes after sex / henry physically responding to pleasure / henry being distracted by your moans while studying / henry & the smell of gasoline / henry muffling you due to your volume / relentlessly teasing henry / cockwarming during studying / sex at bunny's funeral / henry calling you 'good girl' / henry and aftercare / giving henry head to cure his headache / size kink with henry / ignoring henry while he gives you head / clit spanking with henry + coming from your clit being spanked / you and henry at the beach / doggy style position with henry / henry with an inexperienced partner / inexperienced henry with an experienced partner / being bratty with dom!henry + being bratty and fighting henry back / henry burning you with his cigarette / shotgunning a cigarette with henry / jacking henry off with pretty nails / henry using his diary for dirty entries in latin

-> own category — sub!henry: general headcanons / ignoring needy sub!henry / sub!henry punishing you back / making sub!henry beg + reaction to his begging / mirror in front of sub!henry / henry still being dominant while subbing

˚₊· ❥ henry winter sfw / mildly nsfw scenarios

henry & hanahaki disease au / henry with a polar opposite partner / henry with a partner similar to judy / spoiling his partner / getting off on spoiling his partner / enemies to lovers with henry / best friends to lovers with henry / academic rivals with henry / henry being soft(er) with his partner / henry during your period / henry's birthday party at francis' country estate / falling asleep on henry whilst reading / owning a locket with henry's face in it

˚₊· ❥ general satiric / amusing scenarios

gay hampden / list of pop culture scenarios flea wants the greek class to go through / henry holding a baby / playing roblox with the greek class / greek class barbenheimer feud / locking the greek class in a room with the percy jackson movies / the greek class' opinions on percy jackson / being locked in a room with henry / henry watching reality shows with you / henry turning up at your house / showing the greek class colleen ballinger's apology video / keeping the greek class in a glass terrarium / forgetting henry in the cereal isle at walgreens / the greek class being actual people (+ bunny shitting headcanon) / bunny possibly being okay (they revoked their statement) / henry writing smut in his diary

˚₊· ❥ henry winter scenarios inspired by songs

taylor swift — last kiss / taylor swift — illicit affairs / dead girl walking part one + part two

˚₊· ❥ bonus: prose and poetry shared by my saturn anon

one — marble / two — divinity / three — dancing in the rain / four — intimacy overseas

Merry Christmas ❄️

Transcendence (Reader & Ghost / Simon Riley)

AFAB, HEAVY Catholic and Religious Themes, she/her pronouns

divider by @iluvpooks

Simon's life had never left room for faith or spirituality. A practical man, he found no evidence of divine mercy in his struggles. Yet tonight's assignment was simple - observe London's old Catholic cathedral and report any suspicious activity, any possible routes that can be used by snipers, entrances and exits.

As an outsider, the worshipers' devoted prayers seemed strange. But one figure caught his eye - a woman, her face radiating calm acceptance. Her gentle smile seemed to offer the mercy Simon had never known. When their eyes met, he found no judgment in her gaze, only compassion. 

His eyes were drawn to her across the room. A radiant beauty, she had a timeless quality about her. Her features were delicate yet striking, reminiscent of renditions of the Virgin Mary he had seen in great works of art. There was an ethereal grace to her presence, a calmness in her expression that hinted at inner strength and kindness. She seemed a vision, perfectly composed in a way that stirred his admiration.

Her beauty stirs a feeling inside him that's unknown, and even unwelcome, in a battle-hardened mercenary. He can't make sense of it. His heart is hardened from his own trials, and his work is devoid of kindness. He is a soldier with no room for sentimentality. But he finds himself unable to break her gaze, a connection that shouldn't exist. Simon watches from across the street, hidden from her sight. The gentle sway of her hips, the way her dress shimmers... It all strikes a chord inside him, filling him with a familiar unease. He's never felt this way before. He's not supposed to.

Vulnerability had always been a foreign concept to him. From a young age, he was conditioned to eliminate all signs of weakness—emotion, attachment, humanity. He was forged into a weapon, with his every action laser-focused on efficiency and results. Intimacy was an impossible luxury, one not afforded to those whose primary purpose was ending life, not nurturing it. And yet, even for someone stripped so bare of tenderness and connection, there remained an unfillable hollow within. Deep down he wondered, what might it be like to know the gentle warmth of another's touch, if only for a moment, before having to slip back into the numbing role of programmed protector he had long since taken as his sole identity.

He was trained not to care about others. Caring always leads to pain. Yet the sight of her makes him weak. She stands with her hands clasped together, her body swaying ever so faintly in time with the music of worship being sung inside. The light of the stained glass windows falls in a mosaic that dazzlingly reflects from her soft cheeks.

Months had passed since that fateful night, and slowly, steadily, she had chipped away at the impenetrable walls around his guarded heart. Now, as sunlight filtered gently through the window and washed over her sleeping form, he felt only stillness and calm within. For the first time that he could remember, there was no restlessness stirring him to flee, no instinct pulling him back into solitary introspection. All there was, was her—the rise and fall of her bare skin in the soft morning light, a reminder that he was no longer alone.

Simon held no belief in God or faith. Confronted with his duty to end lives, he pondered: What is the purpose of embracing salvation?

Does he even deserve salvation? Forgiveness? Repentance? 

He lacked belief in any form of higher power or destiny. His conviction remained steadfast: relying on unproven truths was both irresponsible and irrational.

All the lofty concepts of divinity and spirituality that had meant so little before seemed but pale imitations in the radiant light of her. When she breathed his name with such tender reverence, it was prayer made flesh - her voice an angelic hymn transporting him to paradise. The way her fingers traced delicate devotion across his skin transcended any ritual, for truly her caress was the only salvation he had ever known. In the hallowed dark behind closed eyes, the kindling of each candlewick touch bestowed a communion more sacred than any sermon. She was sanctuary and salvation writ as one miraculous being, come not to deliver judgment but sweet mercy, embracing his unworthiness without demand yet granting redemption's full bounty just the same. In her alone was encompassed all mysteries of faith he once deemed empty air - here in living, breathing form was divinity that needed no doctrine to be proved divine. 

What is god compared to her?