Kitsunenen - 梦瑶 (Mèng Yáo)

pls rb if you think cuddling doesn't have to be s3xual

im tryna prove a point to my bf's mother help me out

How you react to someone using you as a footrest?

Call for help

Cumplane where Airplane, in a fit of either bravery or insanity or positive or negative self-esteem (he's not totally sure) decides to cosplay as Luo Binghe and post the pictures online.

Of course, he doesn't do it as "Airplane Shooting Towards the Sky", he knows he has some questionable fans and doesn't really want to hand them a picture of his face. So he posts the images under one of the pseudonyms he uses for lurking around the comment section and social media tags. It's just a handful of images of him looking like the protagonist in his head, attempting to strike cool poses in a wig and some period clothes (he rented both).

The reception is... mixed. Airplane does not have abs, after all, nor a flawless complexion or much skill with makeup. He is fat, freckled, and awkward. The PIDW readership is not known for being particularly supportive either. In fact they're mostly a crab bucket of negativity and masculine posturing, so he gets a lot of mean-spirited commentary.

It's fine. Nothing he hadn't expected. Really solidifies for him that posting was a fit of madness, actually! What did he even expect? He's bracing himself for the worst when he sees that Peerless Cucumber, notorious hate-reader and defender of Luo Binghe's honor, has commented. Ah, shit. He's probably going to rip into Airplane for daring to sully his precious Binghe's reputation by dressing up like that, isn't he?

The comment is long, too. Fuck. Airplane's not sure if his self-esteem can take a comprehensive beating from the champion hater himself, but he's too curious not to look.

Shen Yuan, in the meanwhile, is just pleased that there has FINALLY been a Luo Binghe cosplayer who looks the part. Of course Luo Binghe wouldn't have exaggerated muscles, those are just a product of dehydration. Binghe spent most of his disciple years running around chopping wood and hauling laundry, and then later doing whatever he could to pack on the calories in order to make it through the Abyss. A hefty workman's build would only make sense for him, anything else would be nonsense. Airplane also described Luo Binghe as having a beautiful face, which Shen Yuan won't blame most cosplayers for not being able to just make happen, but a beautiful face doesn't mean "covered in so much makeup it looks like an anime character"! When would Luo Binghe have the time or inclination to put on makeup? A natural beauty with some inevitable blemishes would make more sense and be much more appealing, and this "Airplane Crashing to the Ground" (funny play on the author's name, Shen Yuan approves) has very pretty features! Everyone hating on this cosplay is just an idiot, the only actual problem is that his wig is poorly fitted.

So in true Peerless Cucumber fashion, he lays this all out.

This gets him embroiled in arguments with several other fans, who even accuse him of actually being the guy in the photos, claiming that there's no other reason why he would defend them. Shen Yuan doesn't care if people think that's him, because that's still the best Luo Binghe cosplay he's ever seen, but he doesn't want them doubting the sincerity of his arguments. So, he decides that the only reasonable thing to do is dress himself up in cosplay as well and then post the actual photos of himself.

While he'd like to dress up as one of Luo Binghe's allies like Mobei Jun, or maybe someone cool like Yue Qingyuan, he is too pedantic to think he could pull that off. Those guys are all strong warrior types, and Shen Yuan is a scrawny pale rich kid who looks like he'd probably lose a fight with a wet paper towel. The only characters he could plausibly pull off would be some of the more consumptive members of Binghe's harem and maybe, maybe, one of the weaker villains like Shen Qingqiu.

Shen Yuan is NOT posting pictures of himself crossplaying to the central nexus of toxic masculinity itself, so... Shen Qingqiu it is!

Poor Airplane has to go sit and stare at a while for a while. Peerless Cucumber likes his cosplay. Peerless Cucumber, ardent defender of Shang Qinghua's sellout crappy main character mary-sue, thinks Airplane is good-looking enough to cosplay as him. And said so. Repeatedly. And then posted borderline thirst-trap villain cosplay of himself, inadvertently revealing in the process that he is hot.

What the. What. What?!

Anyway, Shen Yuan suggests that they attend the next convention both cosplaying together because Airplane Shooting Towards the Sky is supposed to be doing a meet & greet at that one, and wouldn't it be fun to go as a pair? And Airplane agrees before his brain catches up and he realizes that might present a problem.

This only occurred to me last reread but, oh well.

In the beginning of BSD the mafia do the shootout in the agency and everyone is fine, obviously, Yosano is there. Guess who isn't?

Dazai.

He is always in random places, randomizing his pattern of movement. The cafe, the dorms, the agency, the city, the graveyard, bars. It always seemed as just simple laziness, which yeah checks out, but Dazai is the only ADA member who would actually be killed in a shootout like that. And since we are told the mafia have been to known to cause such scuffles for ADA in the past, it only makes sense for the one ADA member who cannot be magically healed to move around and never be in the office when everyone else is or too often in general.

I've never seen this mentioned anywhere, it is definitely not a new take, but what do you think?

hmm orv au where gamer yjh fans vaguely spot kdj in the background and try to track him across social media.

they discover that he only exists on the internet across a bunch of random videos, almost ALL from famous celebrities and influencers. Everyone who knows someone can't figure out who this man is irl. But he has a nice voice and all his acquaintances seem to be some degree of obsessed with him.

I think it would be really funny if Shen Yuan was a successful author in his first life. Like a high brow, award winning, people dissect his work in lit classes, successful writer. People think he’s reclusive and brooding in a J.D. Salinger way (he’s not, he’s just an antisocial nerd) and his books are super emotional and reflect on the human condition (an accident, SY genuinely does not realize when things are tragic, nor when they’re super homoerotic). He becomes Shang Qinghua’s literary hero, and yeah he wants to be able to write like him one day, but bad smut is what pays the bills regardless of what Peerless Cucumber has to say. So once they’ve both transmigrated, they’re arguing about his writing and SQH is like “Well if it’s so easy to write a book, why don’t you do it?!” and SY is like “I have, it’s not that hard.” (think Elle Woods talking about getting into Harvard energy) and SQH is all sarcastic “Let me guess, you were Shen Yuan in your past life? Pfft” and SY is just like “yeah, actually”. And SQH just blue screens because he cannot accept that this emotionally constipated doofus who’s read every chapter of his shitty smut book is the same guy who wrote a book that made him cry so hard he couldn’t breathe. He just turns around and walks away and then walks off the edge of Bai Zhan Peak like this.

NOOOOOOOOO

What Cursed DPXDC Ship Are You? uquiz

Take a gander at this funky uquiz I made. It took me over 5 hours and you can actively see my sanity wane as the questions go on.

I wonder if, in superhero universes, the villains ever get contacted by those “Make a Wish Foundation” and similar people.

I mean, the heroes do, of course they do, kids who want to meet Spiderman or Superman or get to be carried by the Flash as he runs through Central City for just thirty seconds.

But surely there are also the kids, who - because they are kids and sometimes kids are just weird - decide that what they really, really want is to meet a supervillain. Because he’s scary or she’s awesome or that freeze ray is just really, really cool, you know?

Sucks that "sleeping together" refers to sex. Sometimes a fella just wants to snooze with a pal.

…

Hes like a cat That doesn’t care where you move it as long as it can still stare ominously at the empty room corner

why is this the funniest thing ever