Boop 🌟

He may like it, guys.

I want a Batfam au where everything is the same except Dick is the same person as Robin from the Teen Titans series (2003) but not because of the apprentice arc like many of you might be thinking, (though it wouldn't hurt to throw it in) no I want Dick to have the same "Skills" Read: Superhuman abilities as Robin.

Robin in the Teen Titans was throwing a giant made of cement, shattering his pole with one hit, taking on the rest of the Titans at the same time, when they were holding back and not.

Clark: Are you sure he isn't a meta or alien or something?

Bruce: I check every few weeks.

Oliver: Wait, he's human?

Tim: B! We need backup.

Bruce: No

Steph: Nows not the time for your no outsiders in Gotham rule!

Bruce: Fine I'll contact Nightwing.

Tim: Another non-meta won't cut it!

Bruce: Nightwing is more than enough.

Everyone: ?????

Dick obliterates a massive wall of Ice left by Mr. Freeze

Duke: I thought I was the only one.

Tim: You are.

Jason: You don't sound confident in your answer.

Tim: I'm not

Raven: Why'd I get paired with Nightwing? I don't stand a chance.

Damian: You are the daughter of Trigon.

Raven: And?

Dick, done interrogating someone: Thanks for the Info.

Beast Boy: Back in the day you would have totally sent them to the hospital man!

Jon, unintentionally listening in with his super hearing: huh?????

"Oh, he's cinnamon role coded! He's so soft boi!"

OK. Is he Jesus Coded?

Cut the yaoi and get back to God.

Dead on Main Sugar Daddy

AKA "Ghost King Danny unintentionally becomes Jason "Gaslight, Gatekeep, Girlboss" Todd's sugar daddy" prompt!

This is kind of a continuation of Graveyard Favors, but not really lmao.

I just love the idea of Jason coming back from the dead, wearing all Expensive Clothes and literally ancient cursed jewelry, and Bruce is just like, "Where did you get that? I didn't buy it for you. You haven't used your allowance either?" And Jason's obviously not going to admit he has the High King of Infinite Realms, Space, and the Dead as a sugar daddy. (Maybe he would, he's a dramatic theatre kid at heart, but it's funnier if he just straight up lies.)

He says, "I'm literally a crime lord, old man, keep up?? Jesus."

But the more he thinks about it, the more he actually likes the idea. Jason wants to help people, make sure they never experience the same fate he did, and where else to do it than the place he grew up? He knows there are tons of kids he can help, families who have a lack of resources. He's not afraid to get his hands dirty - he's already killed the Joker.

So, Jason calls up his Ghost King sugar daddy, points to Crime Alley, and is like, "I want that."

Danny, in Tucker's ratty Amity-U hoodie and ripped jeans, cheesepuff sticking halfway out of his mouth, "What???"

Danny declares Crime Alley as Jason's Haunt. It's officially Jason's territory in both the human realm and the Ghost Zome; conveniently, that also means that no supernatural (dead or alive) can enter the territory without Jason knowing. It also makes Crime Alley emit major Do Not vibes. Bad guys feel this Dread of being watched constantly, residents feel a bit safer knowing there's somebody who will help if they're in danger, and Jason patrols often enough that everybody starts to associate him as the local crime lord. He also uses Danny's money to invest in some social programs in Crime Alley, like open access food pantries, shelters, domestic violence & sexual assault support, a community garden, little libraries, funding for after school activities, etc.

Because the former Ghost King is absolutely loaded. Danny has eons of old stuff piled in his throne room in the Ghost Zone from Aztec Gold to alien technology. He's not using it and nobody's gonna miss it, so if Jason asks for it, Danny gives it to him. (Does he know Jason is selling it for an absolute shitton of money? Maybe, maybe not. He doesn't really care where it ends up as long as it won't cause the apocalypse.)

So, yeah, that's how Jason actually becomes the crime lord of Crime Alley.

i'm thinking about jason vs white streak and a helmet that doesn't cover his entire face, and the absolute missed comedy of the entirety of crime alley thinking that they are getting beaten up by a very old man.

Average crime alley guy: yeah and then he stopped wearing the full face cover and his hair is like white underneath it's so weird--

other guy: wait. like. white? Like. LIke old person white?

Average crime alley guy: oh my god. oh my goooood. he uses a voice modulator to hide that he's approximately 98 years old. mr hood sir do you need help crossing the street?

Jason, 19: ?????????????

jason then realizes the convenience of being able to take off the mask and no one realize it's him because they're looking for someone older than alfred and just goes along with it and tells increasingly made up stories about being young in the 40s while shooting peoples kneecaps out.

Peter Parker my favorite heat seeking missile

art based on Existential Crisis Mode on Ao3 by @luciaintheskyainthi. Why draw actual scenes from the media when i can draw them in love and happy instead?

(also, art progress alert? lessgo?)

Headcanon that Jason hated taking pills as a kid, partially due to trauma from being on the streets, but mostly because he's like 10 and they're just yucky

But he's also a kid with ✨️allergies✨️

And Bruce has tried everything. Bribing, begging, being stern, bargaining, everything.

But one day he gets the brilliant idea to hide the pill in a snack and give it to him then, and what do you know, it fucking works

And that's just how he continues to sneak allergy pills into Jason's system

Until Dick catches him and can't stop laughing because, "That's how you give dogs medicine."

And Bruce is mortified at the realization that he's been treating his son like a dog.. But like, it works, regardless, and it's the only thing that works

Years and a pit later, Jason's an adult and his allergies are acting up again so he asks Bruce if he has any allergy meds, and out of pure muscle memory, Bruce reaches for the snack cabinet before he stops and remembers that Jason's an adult now, so he just grabs the medicine bottle and tosses it to him

And that's when it finally clicks for Jason that everytime Bruce gave him a 'random treat,' as a child, it was deception

And he's never felt more betrayed

It’s always “evil Superman!!!!” this, or “villain justice league!!!” that.

I want an AU of villain! Bruce who’s absolutely dog-shit at being evil.

Firstly: The worst thing he can think of doing is not donating to animal shelters or charities . immediately feels so guilty he throws up.

Secondly: The second a child cries because of him, he’d freeze up. Stand like a statue, unmoving and petrified. No more evil, but just today.

He ends up helping the city by accident more often than not, and to his immortal disappointment, Gotham loves both the Bat and Bruce Wayne.

“alfred come look at my evil plan”

“Yes, sir, “ Alfred is very indulgent. He does his best to pretend it’s actually good. “ ‘Don’t say please to the barista’. Getting bold, are we?”

EVERYTIME He and Clark meet and Bruce monologues about pulverizing him to dust, Clark (and the League) looks at him like this:

“I can make him worse,” GOOD FOR YOU!!! Clark can make him into his malewife and adopt his 7 evil sidekicks who actually know how to villain. Especially the little one.