Kackbear - Kackbär

My god i just watched Camelot (1967) and just wow

Poor Arthur

Loving Guinevere, having Lancelot as your closest friend

Realizing after Lancelot is getting knighted that both of them are in love and having an affair, feeling betrayed, but choosing his empathy, love for them.

Thinking about "what do the simple folk do" as a kind of last resort to win back Guinevere, but it ends with her not reciprocating and breaking down. They love each other, are friends, but there is no more romantic love.

Arthurs subjects bringing up the affair even though they risk being banished speaks to me about the love the subjects have for Arthur as king, but also Arthurs biggest weakness, his love for Guinevere and Lancelot. He ignores the calls of his subjects and banishes them in an attempt to cover his friends secrets, ultimately resulting in the downfall of the round table.

Everything is entertwined and comes together to form a big wave, dragging Arthur into a current he cannot control 💔

was having a minor crisis but this appeared in my head and it was so stupid it just snapped me right out of it

i always forget how much of a hell getting up in the morning during the cold months is until im trying to get dressed taking frost damage like ough augh ugha oagh uagh

yippee!!!!

thinking about how when you experience a lot of shame in your formative years (indirectly, directly, as abuse or just as an extant part of your environment) it becomes really difficult to be perceived by other people in general. the mere concept of someone watching me do anything, whether it's a totally normal activity or something unfamiliar of embarrassing, whether I'm working in an excel spreadsheet or being horny on main, it just makes my skin crawl and my brain turn to static because I cannot convince myself that it's okay to be seen and experienced. because to exist is to be ashamed and embarrassed of myself, whether I'm failing at something or not, because my instinctive reaction to anyone commenting on ANYTHING I'm doing is to crawl into a hole and die. it's such a bizarre and dehumanizing feeling to just not be able to exist without constantly thinking about how you are being Perceived. ceaseless watcher give me a god damn break.

😭😭😭😭

Honestly, I have never really used tumblr but a friend talks about it sometimes and I thought "you know what why don't you use it, you have nothing better to do" so let's get into this👍(I have no real idea how this site works tho, so how does posting work here?) i think digitalizing my old sketchbooks and my current one would be fun haha

I have to recite them from start to finish