Only In Gotham Does The School Baseball Team Captain Set Up Practice In Front Of The Apartment Building

Ok so APPARENTLY I can talk to birds, not sure HOW, but I’m bored as fuck and wanna commit ✨C H A O S✨ so I’m taking villain/vigilante name suggestions, so please leave them in the comments. The best I’ve got is Corvid.

I just saw Riddler and Scarecrow making a deal with a bunch of 9th graders that if they all made A’s on there tests today, they would teach them how to hack into the GCPD

Update: GUESS WHAT I LEARNED TODAY (even though I’m in 11th grade)

Guys, when I say kaeya carry’s my damn team, I mean that if I didn’t have him, every beefed hilichurl I came across would’ve wreaked my shit a LONG time ago

This goes to the bitch who said “You still have kaeya in your team? What are you poor?”

By the way this page very much is not safe for Izzy hand. If I was given the chance I’d make him Izzy Handless.

This man is a homophobic gay

I just remembered that when I was a kid I put serious thought into an idea for an edgy villainy themed department store, like as a genuine career goal I devised to be completely within the realm of possibility and if I remember correctly my idea included:

Satirical ads and signage just bragging about being a soulless corporation

Scary uniforms with optional helmets for employees

Only sinister music ever plays

Large, obvious security cameras with visible laser sights

Menacing but technically correct signage, like “corpse flesh” for meats

A pet section with only snakes, spiders, scorpions and piranhas

A moat outside with live alligators. Bass Pro fishing shops already actually do this so why not.

Overwhelmingly large horror dvd selection, all other genres condensed into a smaller section presented kinda like the weenie hut from spongebob

“Skeletons” as an entire department

Carnivorous plant nursery in the garden section

The store holds very frequent raffles and contests but the prize is always knives

My reasoning besides it being fun was that everyone was probably sick to death of businesses pretending to be wholesome and caring about you and people are also just bored in general so the spectacle itself might pay for the cost of its gimmicks and actually all the regular items would be as cheap as possible

Shout out to Riddler, who let me off the hook when I apologized for taking so long to answer a riddle because I forgot my ADHD meds.

Getting caught pickpocketing is embarrassing enough. Getting caught because you tripped over your own feet, and seeing the target leave you five bucks out of pity is unexplainably worse.

@jokesrighthandman hey I feel obligated to warn you Snake got a bazooka and a strong dislike of riddler, plus no self preservation. If your still working for him might wanna keep some distance for a while

Does anyone know what Joker was saying on this morning’s broadcast? It was too bright so I couldn’t hear

SO!

Property value has gone up a touch…. Like a lot

So if anyone in Gotham is looking for a roommate my apartment has another bedroom, and I’m usually not even there so, you know. Stop on by.

Just don’t piss of the neighbors, and you’ll be fine. Probably.