An Essay On Why Glass Squid Are The Best Squids

The Growlers at Beach Goth, Santa Ana, CA

10.22.16

La Jolla, California

Photo by Meg Mindlin

megmindlin.com

okay this a great post but they deserve more credit for their dumb lil brains!!!

They have short and long term memory, the ability to learn and solve complex problems! They even can switch tactics during said problem and work it out another way! Given multiple cognitive tasks they before pretty damn well!!!

They barely have a brain and can do all that!!! They deserve more credit for their hard work !!!!

Nautiluses. THIS goddamn animal.

The fundamentals of this design are HALF A BILLION YEARS OLD. Look at its weird eyes. It evolved back when eyes were still new. Those are literal pinhole cameras. Because nature invented photography the same way we did, apparently.

It doesn't have tentacles. Those are cirri, which lots of sea animals use to do all sorts of things. Fetal nautiluses have one giant slug foot that splits into these. They have noodle antennae made out of foot.

You can bring them up out of the ocean and they can survive the equivalent change of like 80 standard atmospheres. That shouldn't be possible. These things evolved a goddamn spacesuit...500 million years ago.

They also swim via jet propulsion. Their shells make them buoyant, which they can regulate, and they shoot water from a pump. So their 500 million year old spacesuit also has a goddamn rocket pack.

There have been 5 mass extinction events (we are causing a six one now). This thing has survived all of them. And it never got better eyes.

Or A BRAIN. That's right. This thing predates BRAINS. It has two separated lobes behind its top and bottom halves of beak that apparently work well enough that it can track smells with okay accuracy in total darkness, in 3 dimensions.

Here is one eating a dead fish.

Goddamn.

I'm a squid biologist on a mission. To teach everyone about squid.

Even you.

Especially you.

Want squid facts? I have you covered. I have a squid facts hotline, 1-833-SCI-TEXT. Text SQUID to that number (1-833-724-8398), and it'll send you squid facts aplenty.

I have even created an advent calendar for you to learn squid facts throughout December. It's an 11 by 14 inch scratchy lottery, but instead of taking a chance at winning money, you are guaranteed to learn about squid.

I have a street art campaign to bring squid facts to the people. You might see wheatpastes (like the squid below) if you live in Philly, Boston, Austin, or New York, or stickers if you live in hundreds of other cities and towns across North America.

When you buy a calendar, you're supporting my undying mission to bring squid to everyone. Did you know that squid have donut shaped brains? That their class, cephalopods, have been on earth for longer than TREES? That scientists estimate that there are literally millions of giant squid living in the deep sea?

People deserve to know about squid. Help me spread the word.

Loligo pealeii

go mentally deranged yeh. go brainless yeh. go wacky. go positively bonkers yeh. go mad bruv. lose ya marbles yeh. go foolish

Limacia cockerelli

photography by meg mindlin

Idk about y’all but valentines memes have been my favorite part of the holiday since I was an inappropriately young child on the internet

So I made some cephalopod themed ones for your enjoyment <3

These puns are ones that did not make the cut for our actual Valentine’s Day cards shown in the last image

Purchase them at squidfacts.bigcartel.com <3

i love you gar.... my best friend gar

Climbing a mountain just to read a book >>>

The Sea Creature of the Day is the Gulper Eel/Pelican Eel!

i keep forgetting to do this until im half asleep each night so this one is going to be a shorter one

i love deep sea creatures that just have the adaptation of more mouth 🥰 among those, the gulper eel is by far the most simultaneously horrifying and adorable and i love them a lot

every time they eat something i like to imagine them making a lil "nom" noise