Illuminaudacity - Bitch Pls

"A wilderness you kinda miss"

'Monkey' (/destined one) x reader | Oneshot

reader is gender neutral! no physical appearance of the reader is mentioned (other than him thinking your attractive, lol)

trigger warnings: suggestive, with a mention of being naked with intimate kissing and some arousal at one point. but nothing explicit happens! either way, minors DNI !

word count: 2053

note: reader is a human who tags along with him (for whatever reason y'all want to imagine), reader has been traveling with him for about a year. the two of you decide to warm up and wash up at a nearby hot spring.. where he realizes something about himself that he enjoys, but is also scared by..

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Luck is a virtue that doesn't bless many; opening a window can let in a butterfly, just as easily as it can let in the rain. This was something that the destined one knew very well.. This journey was fraught with many surprises - of which you and him were both that in your own rights. Your existence and subsequent insertion into the journey make things.. Interesting, and a bit complicated. He wasn’t the easiest person to get along with, that he won’t deny. But- you were an average mortal.. Meanwhile he was a determined and courageous warrior, driven by a sense of duty to fulfill his destiny and restore Sun Wukong to his former glory! He's gone toe to toe with many beasts and monsters, many of whom could strike down even some of the gods, and has even fought fellow ‘demons’ like himself. All in pursuit of his goal, and never once has he been bested in combat, though he did have a few close calls when he first set out on this quest. And that's where they (you) come in.. this mortal that he cannot get rid of or shake off of his trail, who seems so intent on aiding him.. He didn’t deny such assistance, as having someone to watch your back is very useful in lands like these, where danger lurks around every corner, and which tries to strike you down during every blink you take. Even if you were a mortal, who had no magical abilities or really any combative skills, you still somehow kept pace with him, and even helped point out things he somehow didn’t notice himself. That was something of which he both respected and appreciated. Honestly, he had never known such care, having been a loner practically all his life back on mount huoguo..

You were a powerless mortal, someone who posed no threat to him whatsoever. So.. if that's the case, why did he feel all of his hair bristle and stand on end when you looked at him? How he had to pin down his tail to keep it from wagging like some mutt every time you complimented him after killing a beast blocking your path with a single blow, and even how he had to hold his breath to try and stop his heart from beating loud enough to deafen himself - fearful that somehow or someway, you might hear it? It both confused and frustrated him. He had always been more on the quiet side, occasionally letting out a response to your questions, telling you a battle story from before he met you - in a bragging sort of way, or even a quirky taunt to an adversary at the very least.. but he found himself unable to utter a single sound every time you locked eyes with him. He wasn't sure how to feel about it at first, or even what these feelings meant. He didn’t dare ask anyone for advice in fear of embarrassing himself and losing his well known persona of ‘suave and well put together warrior who cannot be swayed by anything’.. Which was hard to not lose hold of when he was constantly fretting over you and your safety or health, while also trying to act unbothered by it all. It made him feel weak and pathetic, like some sort of civilian.. He was a warrior for goodness sake! But, suppose’ it can’t be helped.. Afterall, you could die from any little thing! Mortals aren’t (seemingly) impervious like he is.. Sure he knew you weren’t completely fragile, but maybe it didn’t feel that way when he carried you so gently - as though you were made of glass - when you both needed to cross a gap without a bridge or had to fly on his nimbus cloud to pass certain areas that he deemed too dangerous for you to exist in. How his gaze never left your direction whenever you both set up camp or were foraging for some food, or simply just walking..

This time however, he.. Didn’t feel justified in his staring. He hoped you never noticed how he could never take his eyes off of you, but if you did.. You’d certainly pick up on how, right now, it was as if he thought looking at you would turn him to stone or something! The two of you had decided to make a pit stop at a nearby hot spring after setting up camp for the night. At first, he didn’t seem interested in it, but when you told him it would ease his sore muscles - he complied, knowing self care was important even though he often pushed himself too far without regard for that. You sat across each other in the pool of warm and partly steaming water, which was sizable enough for you both to stretch out if you wanted without invading each other's space. He had his arms crossed against his hairy chest, with his head leaned back against a stone. Staring up at the moon and all its fullness.. trying to look anywhere but at you. He felt your gaze stabbing through him, but didn’t give in. you wondered what he was thinking, or why he was suddenly acting like you had the plague. It both annoyed and worried you.. Was it because the both of you were nude? Has he never seen another person's body before? You’d understand if it was just that, but.. He had been acting like this beforehand, so you doubted it was the only reason.

“Are you gonna stay quiet, or are we gonna talk? I think silence can be comfortable, but recently you’ve made it more.. Conflicting. Is something wrong?”

Upon hearing your words, you saw him squeeze his eyes shut for a moment, while sucking in a deep breath and holding it for a moment. You sat there in suspense, waiting for his answer, but he didn’t respond.. Acting like he didn’t hear you. With a huff, you decided to take matters into your own hands. You slid through the water, with him seeming to not notice the water as it rippled and sloshed from you heading over to him. Upon you reaching him, you stood up out of the water in front of him. Which caught his attention, as he tilted his head back down - his eyes meeting yours. He then noticed you were standing bare - longer shielded by the water, and were in very close proximity to him, while staring at him with quite a lot of intensity as you placed your hands on your hips in an annoyed manner.

He felt his body temperature increase, staring from the center of his chest before rising towards his head, blazing in his ears. It was bubbling up in his throat in an almost uncomfortable way, as he began to have a wonderful tingling feeling in his chest. he felt as though he had stepped out of a cool air conditioned room, and stood underneath the violent summer sun. without any sunscreen or an umbrella, laying his heart out bare on a grill and watching as the smoke billowed from the core. the sizzling sound of it being ripped apart at the seams from the heat in front of his very eyes until there was nothing left, filled his ears.. and yet, the heart beat was all he could hear, it was almost deafening. And it only got worse once you leaned forwards and placed your hands on his shoulders, keeping him sitting - to insure he wouldn’t run away.

“We’re talking, whether you like it or not! Monkey, tell me what's wrong. please..”He gulped, and just nodded. Being unable to resist your plea, knowing how genuine you were in your care for him at this moment. He tried his best to keep his eyes locked with yours, but couldn’t keep them from wandering slightly, scanning your body. Regardless of how you viewed yourself, he thought you were the most breathtaking being.. Thinking you must have been sculpted by one of the gods. He couldn’t fathom why you chose to stay by his side, in spite of his flaws and inhuman appearance.. He didn’t view himself as ugly, but.. He knows he’s not the common human ideal of attractive, either. He felt sinful for thinking these thoughts, not just because he was supposed to be an iron glad warrior with an unbreakable goal.. Bit, also because he felt like he didn’t deserve you. That you were way out of his league, and that he felt blessed to even stand near you - let alone bath with you..! It was difficult, you could tell, but he managed to speak after a long pause of silence.

“I know I treat others, and you, like you cannot reach me.. That I am above all life due to my role in the world, due to what I am destined to do. But, to me, you were more than just a person. You were- are, a place where I finally feel at home. I feel as though you have wormed your way under my skin, and latched down.. Unable to be ripped out. Im.. im meant to be powerful, one of the strongest beings out there! but.. When I am with you, when you look at me, i.. I feel so weak. I feel as though I melt, like snow under the summer sun. I am unable to think right when I hear you speak, when you laugh.. I thought I hated it, I thought you placed a hex on me somehow- but.. I realized, I quite.. liked it. I’ve.. never felt this alive before, and.. It makes me worried. If I keep feeling like this, what will happen? Will I no longer be vigilant? Will I lose focus on my mission? Will I start slacking, causing you to get hurt by something I could have parried if only I weren't so distracted by your glory?! I.. I'm sorry, this is unprofessional of me. I just–”As he ranted, you felt a surge of confidence swell through you. This is how he felt? Really?? You couldn’t recall anyone before who had thought of you in such a tender or intense way. And before he could continue his ramblings, you cut him off - shutting him up with a kiss. Your lips locking with his, causing him to let out a short muffled gasp of surprise, before leaning into the kiss - cupping your face with his hands, as his tail wrapped around both of your legs, to keep you steady. The moon, with all her might, illuminated the both of you.. as fireflies flickered in and out of existence around the water. All that could be heard were distant crickets, and the deafening drumming of your hearts.. As your kissing became like a passionate flame, hands began to wander, and lips found their holding on opposing necks..

he loved how it felt when his heart raced - he was enraptured by how you made him feel. He loved how much he loved you. you were the one thing keeping him sane, keeping him from.... Well, he won't dwell on that. but at the same time.. it hurt him so very much, it hurt that he couldn't express himself the way he wanted to, or the way that you probably expected him to.. Especially so with emotions and love. that he couldn't shout from the rooftops how much you meant to him. not without putting you at risk, with all the enemies he had accumulated over the years. He knew you wouldn't willingly harm him, but he was afraid of being hurt again, a common fear for sure. although he would be seen as either looking like a deer in headlights from your point of view.. he hoped you didn't notice how warm he felt. He hoped his body heat didn't scold off your perfect skin as he held you in that already warm water. But he wanted you to always know, and hoped you could tell through his gaze, that you were his everything. That you are his everything. And that nothing and no one could ever change that, for if they tried - they’d wind up at the end of his staff and put 6 ft under the hearty soil of the earth..

Flower jewels (glass, gold, enamel, diamonds, gemstones) by René Lalique

OMFG THIS COMMENT. GUISE. THAT LAST SENTENCE IS SO FUCKING RAW

you don’t need to ask for jane anymore: a guide to coming to chicago for a safe, low-cost abortion

A lot of people in the US are super worried about the Supreme Court axing Roe v. Wade, but what they might not know is that some states have laws in place that will protect the right to reproductive choice and abortion if that happens. One of these states is the state of Illinois. In 2019, a law was passed that protects abortion rights within the state even if the federal right to an abortion falls. This means that if Roe v. Wade is overturned, abortion will still be a protected right in Illinois. Even before Roe, Chicago was a haven for safe abortions- you just called and asked for Jane.

Now, safe abortion access is the law of the land in IL, and there are several groups who can help you. This post is long, but I think it’s worthwhile. Even if you don’t read all the way through it, maybe save it for later. You or someone you know might need it. If you want to stop now, the TL;DR is this:

f you’re a minor and you can’t tell your parents, get a waiver of notification from the IL Judicial Bypass program.

Schedule your appointment.

Contact abortion funds to get financial aid. Your home state might have s fund, and the Chicago Abortion Fund can help.

Secure housing for the procedure through the Midwest Access Coalition or by talking to the intake staff at the clinic of your choice.

I’d like to start by saying that the closer to home you get your abortion, should you need one, the easier it will be for you… probably. It depends on your individual situation AND your safety. If I still lived in Indiana and I needed an abortion, I’d probably leave to get it done, even though there are abortion providers in Indiana, because Indiana is super hostile and there’s lots of clinic protestors- for example, when I was taking my GRE my senior year at Notre Dame, the testing center was in this little strip mall in Mishawaka next to Planned Parenthood. Despite the fact that the PP in Mishawaka does not provide abortions, there were protestors who yelled at me for going in there. I wasn’t even going to PP. I’d like to say that I said something devastatingly cool but I just ran in flustered. Point being: It really, really would have sucked if I was there for healthcare instead of a standardized test for graduate school. And that’s a very tame, mild situation! Real abortion clinic protests are often much more devastating! 

ANYWAYS. The less you have to travel, the easier things tend to be, if it’s safe to get an abortion where you are and if your state will have protected abortions if Roe is overturned. If you’re not sure what might happen in your state in that case, this map has a clear, succinct overview of the legal status of abortion in each state and all US territories. You will want to click through to that link, because this image isn’t interactive.

[ID: a map of the US with states and territories sorted by their legal protections for abortion into four categories: expanded access in the case of Roe v. Wade being overturned, protected, not protected, and hostile. IL is highlighted.]

So let’s say you live in any of those red states. (Yellow and blue are safe- abortion access is protected there.) Let’s say, worst case scenario, Roe gets overturned and you get pregnant and you want to terminate. You will be able to do that in IL, and it’s relatively easy to do that in Chicago for a relatively low cost and with the benefit of a robust support network of people who want to reaffirm your reproductive choices.

First, if you’re a minor and you don’t want to tell your parents because it’s not safe for you to do so, get a judicial waiver of parental notification. The IL ACLU has a judicial bypass hotline. This will come at no cost to you. Do this ASAP, because it takes time to get it set up! You can do this by calling the hotline at 877-442-9727, texting 312-560-6607, or emailing judicialbypass@aclu-il.org.

Next, you need to get an appointment set up. You could get a referral from someone local to you, but this can be tricky- 87% of counties in the US don’t have an abortion provider, and google can lead you to a crisis pregnancy center. They will not help you. If you have a local Planned Parenthood, call them. Even if they don’t provide abortions, they can refer you to someone who can. If you’re coming to Chicago, which this post… kind of assumes you are… you can call any of these groups to talk about your options and what clinics can help you. I recommend starting with FPA or PP; those are two actual clinics. MAC and CAF are funds- they can direct you but they can’t schedule an appointment for you.

Family Planning Associates (FPA): 312-707-8988 or use their online schedule tool, found here: https://www.fpachicago.com/schedule-now/ Chicago Abortion Fund (CAF): Phone: 312-663-0338 (note: the helpline is only staffed MWF from 3:30-6:30 PM CST, or email helpline@chicagoabortionfund.org Midwest Access Coalition (MAC): 847-750-6224 or email support@midwestaccesscoalition.org Planned Parenthood of Illinois (PP): 1-800-230-7526

You might want to shop around and see which clinic costs the least, and is the most practical for you to get to. FPA has a lot of patient resources, as does PP. Don’t be afraid to ask for financial assistance. The people staffing those organizations have extensive networks and deep compassion for their patients- if the clinic can’t help, they might know who can.

Once you’ve made an appointment, now’s the time to start gathering financial aid. Some insurance, including IL Medicaid, covers it. If yours does not, or if the copay is still too much, this is where abortion funds come into play. Many states have their own abortion funds for state residents, so you might have to look around to see who can help you. I’d start with the National Network of Abortion Funds.

You also need to figure out transportation and housing while you’re in the city to get your abortion. This isn’t super necessary if you’re just coming for the pill abortion, but if you’re coming for a d and c or other surgical procedure, you will be staying for a couple of days. THIS is why I’m writing this up, because abortion funds typically only are able to help cover the financial cost of the procedure. It’s expensive to stay somewhere and it can be absolutely terrifying if you’re on your own! Navigating while you’re in pain from the procedure can be an absolute devil of a time, too! However, Chicago has MAC (contact info above), which is a practical access fund, which means that they help pay for transportation to the city (bus tickets and train tickets) and around the city (volunteer drivers or volunteers who take rideshares with clients), food, aftercare medicine (painkillers, etc.), and housing, and there’s also free access to emotional support staff throughout your stay. This is not just open to IL residents; it’s open to anyone coming to the city for an abortion. ALSO if you go through FPA, they have a partnership with the Hampton Inn a block away from their location where their patients get a discount. If you go that route, just talk to FPA about housing and they’ll hook you up. This can be super helpful if you need some evidence that you’re on a “business trip” or something like that- if you are in a position where you need an excuse for your safety, that might work well.

Hopefully you won’t need this post- but if you do, I hope it helps. Feel free to share it around. If you have anti-choice opinions and you feel the need to share, don’t. This isn’t the space for it; you will be blocked and your comments removed. And then remember that criminalizing abortion won’t stop abortion. It’ll just stop safe abortions. Also, increased access to abortion, funnily enough, tends to be the thing that lowers abortion rates, because increased access to abortion comes part and parcel with increased access to birth control and general health and sex education.

fuck it here have the mad sweeney fic playlist

Important Milestone

The song about how nobody likes you when you're 23 turns 23 today

i....found a rare shoegaze tape. legit. band does not exist online. tape is at least 20 years old. This is so Sam

Broke:

Belle has Stockholm syndrome because she falls in love with the Beast, her kidnapper.

Woke:

Stockholm syndrome was coined to slander a woman who had been in a hostage situation but openly criticized the poor police response which recklessly put her in more danger and escalated the violence. She was then belittled and discredited publically by the police for this.

So. Yeah. Maybe Belle does have Stockholm syndrome actually.

i lied abt only posting abt this situation once, i just saw this lovely person’s comment!! passing it on to tumblr 🫡