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okay, hear me out...........James Potter variant

Looking more like a checklist these days. I want off this ride. 😭

Reading is political and it always has been. Here are some of the classic books on the banned list that you should definitely check out.

I got the purple!

have you guys done that “what kind of reader are you” quiz and if so what did you get

Me, Catholic, walking into a Protestant church with no depictions of Mary: where’s my mom

do not eat your yummy cheeseboruger too fast. something fucked up and sinister might happen

Oh boy oh boy its the discjude official COVEN bingo card!!! not many are about the coven themselves because i uh uh don't know too much about them but yeah. I've put a brief explanation of each of these under the cut (because a few are vague) (WARNING its a lot):

Lady Lesso mentioned: this one sort of coincides with "hester true evil speech". I reckon she's important enough to the witches to warrant a mention. Also. I think all of the Lessos might be relevant but I talk about that in my predictions

Obligatory Sophie cameo: she's Soman's favourite. She's showing up

Political commentary: based off of his substack, I don't think Soman will go too overt with it, but I think there'll be a more roundabout one. I'd love to see him address the fact that he wrote in that homophobia is a thing in SGE. Soman if you can hear me

Drag race reference: He's done this a lot before, in QFG mostly, and I think he'll do it again

TCY acknowledged: this could be like a "haha yeah you remember how the storian almost got destroyed? that was kinda crazy aha". I have a horrible feeling that he's going to completely skip over that part of canon

Hester gives a speech about "true evil": i mean come ooonnnnnnn. I also think this'll include something about evil love that contradicts the canon about it

No blatant fatphobia regarding dot: Soman phased this out in TCY I think he'll have stuck with it

Rats are, somehow, back. Not explained: Japeth killed at least one of those things and I genuinely think Soman will have forgotten it

Events of R+F acknowledged: ties into my predictions a bit, but I reckon the setup regarding neverland and the other stuff in Fall might come up

I'm right about my predictions: I think the entire thing looks very aquatic themed, and there's a lot regarding evil water stuff, so a) the mermaids are relevant b) the saders are (still) relevant c) the lessos are relevant. that's the big three in my opinion. I can't wait to be horrifically wrong

Storian still at fault: i mean. name one book where it isn't. and you cant say OTK that doesnt COUNT

Symbolic ending of the series thing: I want the storian dead. thats what this one means

Obligatory tagatha: come onnnnnnnnn

There is at least one twink: yeah. not much to say here

Vaguely pub-style setting: this one also includes "why is everything british" because i said so

None Japeth: Japeth is mentioned by name exactly no times. I'd love to have faith but I really don't

Tennis reference: I fucking CAUGHT Botic being a tennis player's surname in the prequels. he's GOING to try it again

Colour/lighting symbolism: have a draft rn about colour symbolism in SGE and I think Soman might lean into it

At least one snake: please i want to feel something

hestadil real: come ON he's doing this every tiktok post about coven has had the hestadil tag he's doing this

Aric is referenced: goes with my predictions and lady lesso being mentioned. I hate to say it I think he's far more likely to be referenced than Japeth

Big unanswered question gets answered: the BIG!! one is the Aric Dad Reveal. I want to know for parallel reasons and I think it could happen. maybe

no wait! We'll use the power of friendship: speaks for itself. something like this happens

major character death: goodbye dot. im being fr I think she's dying in coven

Thank you dearly to @liketwoswansinbalance for some of these entries I really struggled to think of some. Also no I'm not convinced of my predictions. But it'd be nice. right

Remus Lupin has a Dr Pepper addiction