I Declare Lego Loki The Supreme Version Of All Lokis, You May Now Clap

Are we gonna talk about the way the Avengers know absolutely nothing about Clint?

Like do they know he has a brother? An apartment in BedStuy? a one-eyed dog he shares with his sharpshooting prodigy/ annoying younger sister? Do they know why he learned archery at all? Do they know he’s deaf?

Do they know anything about him at all?

(If anyone has a fic where the avengers realize Clint is a 3d person with real backstory and trauma I’d love to read it)

Y’all know that one Harry Potter scene where draco folds that paper crane, sends it to harry and he opens it just to see a drawing of himself being struck by lightning?

That. But. Lokius.

Mobius: Oh, this is nifty, did you fold it yourself?

Loki, nodding casually: Uhuh .. Mother taught me, open it.

Mobius, starting to carefully unfold the crane: Are you sure? I’d hate to ruin your work.

Loki, watching: …

Mobius: …

Loki: …

Mobius: Wow.

Loki: I think I really captured your essence.

Mobius: So do I.

Loki: Really?

Mobius: Moustache and all.

[Bonus points if they’re already married and just in a tiff, Mobius initially thinking the crane was Loki apologising]

The moment I don't repost this just assume I'm dead

how do i hit him

Why I Don't Hate Ultimate Reed

Now, here’s a question for you. You’d think, with all the hate I have for 616 Reed, I’m destined to despise his Ultimate counterpart. And I’ll admit right away, he’s awful.

After having read Ultimate Fantastic Four, all the way to his downfall (but not further, not yet), I certainly have some thoughts on this incarnation of Reed Richards. But hate him? I really don’t. 

Let me explain in a long way full of side thoughts. 

An unwanted child 

They make it a point in the very beginning to show us that Reed’s childhood was no walk in the park. Instead of nurturing his natural gifts, his father constantly yelled at him for disassembling house appliances, his mother didn’t bother to stand up for her kid, and he got relentlessly bullied at school. The only friend he ever had was Ben, and he was pretty much the only one who cared enough to defend him. This could’ve gone one of two ways: he could’ve become someone who never wanted anyone else to go through the same thing, or he could’ve sworn revenge on everyone who’s wronged him. 

Reed turned out as a little bit of both. 

A star pupil 

When Reed got to the Baxter Building, his skills were praised and his achievements celebrated. It seemed kind of like what was happening to his 616 version; he even got the girl who, in this iteration, was a gifted scientist. Reed still got into trouble, but now, he had a trusty BFF, a girlfriend, and her tag-along brother, who, what do you know, was still good-for-nothing. If there’s a multiversal constant, it’s that Johnny Storm is a screwup. 

But this ain’t about Johnny. It is, however, about Sue. I have already heard more than once that Sue leaving Reed was what kicked him over to the villain side. 

But let’s not do that. Let’s not blame her for making a healthy choice for herself.

Reed was treated as a young superstar and, for the most part, his projects were not questioned simply because no one could understand what they were about. And well, if there was a military application to his discoveries… You know what’s what. 

The team had many adventures, but what they called adventures, more often than not it was a global disaster and somehow always a direct result of Reed’s misguided research. On paper, he blamed himself for each and every one of them. But accepting the responsibility and avoiding making the same mistake again are not the same. 

If anything, I would assume that every time he got blamed, he took it as simpletons yet again not being enlightened enough to understand his greeted purpose. That’s why he ended up dreaming of a different world, where his genius would be celebrated. 

A smart friend 

Many fans try to pinpoint the moment Reed turned evil. But how do you do that? It was never Sue’s fault (no freaking way in hell) by the time they met, he already had enough anger inside to use all of his inventions for the worst. As if all that hate he received throughout his childhood festered inside of him for a good decade. It was never resolved, and no one even tried to. The only time a therapist even crossed the threshold of the Baxter Building, it was a very evil version of Agatha Harkness who wasn’t even a witch but an entity hatched from an alien egg. And even she was more interested in Johnny. With his obsession with science and research, Reed naturally didn’t reflect on his own issues. And having a relatively strong support system helped keep him afloat for a while. But not for long.

An obsessed scientist

Now, people do love to blame Thanos for Reed’s asshole behavior when he got hold of the cosmic cube. But again, let’s not. He himself chose to tinker with the cube, it turned out he was always the reason for the cube’s existence. So all in all, Reed totally brought it on himself. And hey, that IS why Sue wanted time off from him. Believe it or not, Namor’s green underwear had nothing to do with that. 

Reed’s guilt over having created Doom didn’t really help. No, it only pushed him further into his research and led him to discover alternative dimensions in which Doom was always an evil tyrant. Now it could be one of two things. We do know that Dooms travel the multiverse and such, helping other Dooms ascend to Doomhood, but also, would Reed ever admit that there is a Doom somewhere whose sole purpose in life is to spread love, support, and understanding? Anyway, Dooms are responsible for Dooms, and Richards couldn’t have been more self-absorbed at that moment. 

An inevitable villain 

Now, to the main course. I stated this in the beginning, and I’m standing by my own words. I don’t hate Ultimate Reed. I don’t, because he is the only logical solution to Reed Richards. He is Reed left on his own, he is the Reed that Reed tries to suppress. The true Reed, if you may. 

That is his character growth, that is his natural path, if you consider how he approached every conflict ever, if you consider how heartless he is, and what ripples his actions send across the world. That is why Reed fears The Maker, and that is why The Maker hates Reed. 

The biggest difference between Reed-616 and Reed-1610 isn’t that one has completely stepped over the line and the other hasn’t (yet). It’s that the same actions are viewed as heroic and concerning. Of course, it all becomes a warning sign only after. In the words of Carol Danvers, the world’s been attacked by a pubescent gnome, and no one saw it coming. Except they should have.

Either way, it’s the fact that we accept one as evil while another one is slowly getting his public image reinvented, as if we’re supposed to just gloss over his history. 

Ultimate Reed is horrifying, just like 616 Reed should be. 

A MENACE

some of my favorite lines of dialogue i've overheard in marvel rivals so far

(keep in mind these are all paraphrased im going off of memory cuz i never have the reflex to screenshot these as they happen oops)

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"I never had kids, but I did have the Avengers. Same thing." - Iron Man spawning in

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"One for me, one for Steven, one for Jake." - Moon Knight after getting a triple kill

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"Can you teach me some of your magic-?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"I think you've had enough chaos already." - Loki & Scarlet Witch interaction

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"You have made your father proud, Wanda, my dear." - Magneto when assisting a Scarlet Witch with a kill

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"No one breaks a bargain with me twice."

"So I can do it once?" - Hela & Loki interaction

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"When I said "No More Mutants" you were who I meant, Logan." - Scarlet Witch after killing a Wolverine

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"How did you learn magic?"

"A place called Kamar-Taj."

"Oh so you weren't bitten by, like, a radioactive sorcerer?"

"[Extremely exasperated] Peter, please..." - Doctor Strange & Spiderman interaction

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"Leave real magic to the grown-ups, Ilyana." - Scarlet Witch killing a Magik

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"Nerd win!" - Bruce Banner if he gets a kill in his non-Hulk form

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"Are you fast enough to stop a bullet, if I shot you?"

"Well, you won't be able to. I already dismantled the inner-mechanisms of all of your guns."

"Wh- What?!"

"Now if you behave yourself I might fix them." - Punisher & Magneto interaction

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"So you can talk to rodents?"

"Tippy-Toe seems to think so!"

"Can you try and convince Rocket to clean his bunk?"

"There are some things even I can't do, I'm afraid." - Star-Lord and Squirrel Girl interaction

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"We sense great darkness and chaos within you, woman."

"You're one to talk, Venom."

"No, we... Find it strangely... Attractive."

"...Somehow, that made me want to save this universe less." - Venom & Scarlet Witch interaction

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"It's good to be fighting side by side again, like in the old days."

"Back when you used children as soldiers for your cause?"

"When you put it like that, you make me sound like a terrible father."

"For once, we agree on something." - Magneto & Scarlet Witch interaction

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"[in the sassiest tone you can imagine] Your GOD is SUFFERING!!!" - Loki taking damage

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[i also dont remember the exact dialogue but there IS one with rocket asking to buy bucky's arm. so yes we won there]

This took me too long anyway let that cougar win

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The Onion + Loki (30/?)

I'd like to first clarify that I am in fact a sane person

drawing yuckey nasty....

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