*screams*

my favorite genre of alien picture is little grey aliens just naked in the woods like why the fuck are you here. you have a spaceship. why did you come to earth to just stand in the woods and look at us with no clothes

Car Trunk vs Car Boot: A clear win for US English, trunk was already a thing in which you stored items, frequently for transport.

Crisps vs Chips: I gotta admit, the Brits have this one. They're thin slices of potato that have been made crispy. No chipping of any materials involved.

Car Park vs Parking Lot: Equally matched. What's a car park? A place to park cars. What's a parking lot? An otherwise empty lot where you can park.

Elevator vs Lift: Both equally fail to address that the damn thing also goes down.

Customer: Would you recommend the spicy nuggets?

Me: If you like spicy food you'll love the spicy nuggets :)

Customer: Ugh, I fucking hate spicy food :(

Me: ... Are... Are you being sarcastic?

Customer: No 😡

Me:

Customer:

Me:

Customer:

Me: ...Then I wouldn't recommend the spicy nuggets for you, Sir....

This is a real interaction I just had with a customer. Why are you wasting my time?? It's in the fucking name! SPICY nuggets!!

Ever notice how any time someone calls you "cringe", 99 times out of 100 what they mean is "you're happy and I don't like it"

This too shall pass but like holy fuck

Happiness Will Come To You.

ok anyways. post this beast

Can't express how stress free being open minded is.

Some lesbians use he/him? Oh cool.

Some people have people inside their head and sometimes it's fictional chars? Sick your brains like a pirate ship they're all working to run.

Some people like being treated like a pet dog? Bark bark bro.

Being fat isn't unhealthy but a perfectly normal type of body to have? Kinda beautiful how different we can all be.

Something doesn't make any fucking sense? Cool an opportunity to learn. And even if I can't figure it out it's cool we still have mysteries today.

laptop overheating?? pour water on it to cool it down!