Can Someone Please, Please Pretty Please Recommend Me Fics Where One Of The Bat Siblings Get Into A Fight

I don't know what I read, but I love it and I want 20 more, please and thank you.

Living with a gangster

Mafia man x Gn!Reader

Summary: moments in your life when your weirdo of a boyfriend gets you both in the most randomness possible scenarios. You love him though

a/n: ummm ummm writing for now bc my Apple Pencil broke so yeah!!

You’re on the couch, unwinding after a long day. The soft hum of the TV fills the room as you kick your feet up, enjoying a rare moment of peace. That peace shatters the moment your boyfriend walks through the door, looking like he’s been through hell and back.

There’s even stains on his white pants. Gross.

Bruised, bloodied, and entirely too proud of himself, he barges in with a grin plastered on his face. “I brought you something,” he says, and there’s a certain cockiness in his voice that you’ve come to expect from him.

You turn to look, already knowing whatever he’s holding will be ridiculous. “What is it?”

You ask, trying to suppress the exhaustion from your voice.

With a flourish, he reveals a ragged, battered stuffed bear. Its fur is matted, and there’s a stain that could be blood—or maybe it’s just the bear’s battle scars. One of its eyes is hanging by a single thread.

“A battle bear,” he announces proudly.

You stare at it for a beat. “A what?”

“A battle bear. I had to fight a bunch of idiots to get it. It was a whole ordeal, but I thought you’d want it.”

You blink, deadpan. “So you got into a fight for a stuffed animal?”

“Yup,” he says, a little too smug for someone who just looked like they were hit by a bus. “It’s yours now. For protection, obviously. You’ll be safe with this thing. Like a bodyguard, but fluffier.”

You glance from him to the bear. “This thing looks like it’s seen better days. What kind of fight were you in?”

“It’s fine. Just a little blood. Nothing serious,” he assures, his grin widening. “So? Do you love it?”

You pause, still eyeing the mangled bear. “Sure, I guess. I don’t know if it’ll protect me, though. It looks like it’s seen as much action as you.”

He flops onto the couch next to you, snatching up the bear. “It’s a symbol of my dedication. Don’t downplay it.”

“You could do anything with it cry with it, cuddle, feed it, maybe even tell it about how much you love!”

“Nice try.” It’s just a thought but you are thinking he’s going to be the one to do those things.

It’s been a long day, and you were hoping for some peace. You’ve barely sat down on the couch when your boyfriend bursts in, completely out of nowhere, practically vibrating with excitement.

“I missed you!” he exclaims, then immediately starts some unholy combination of spinning, hopping, and awkward flailing. His hips are nowhere near Shakira’s level of shaking.

He’s rattling like a broken supermarket cart.

You stare at him, eyebrows raised. “What in the world are you doing?”

“This is my I missed you dance,” he says, spinning once again like he’s in some bizarre action movie. “It’s a tradition now. Every time I come home, I perform it to show my appreciation for you.”

You blink. “A dance?”

He nods, still twisting around, his limbs making chaotic, out-of-rhythm movements. “Yup! It’s a way of showing how much I care about you.”

“Yeah, I can tell,” you say dryly, eyes narrowing as you watch him crash into the coffee table, almost toppling over the lamp. You can’t help but let out a sigh. “Are you done yet?”

He doesn’t answer, too busy still trying to perfect whatever this is. His leg kicks too high and knocks into the side of the bookshelf. He spins again, only to hit his elbow on the doorframe.

“You’re really not helping your case here,” you mutter, leaning back. “How exactly am I supposed to take you seriously when you’re like this?”

With a grunt, he halts his movements, standing tall like he just finished a perfect performance. “I’m a dangerous man, babe. Nobody could top this move.”

You stare at him, deadpan. “You’re a mess.”

He grins like he won the lottery. “I’ll take that as a compliment.”

You walk through the door after running a simple errand. But as soon as you step inside, you’re met with your boyfriend standing in the living room, hands on his hips, wearing a look of complete panic.

“Where have you been?” he demands, voice high and tight with concern. “I’ve been worried as shit.. Do you know how long it’s been? What if something happened to you? Like if a Mario cosplayer asked for your number? Or if my boss figures out we make passionate love in ghost face costumes?”

You stop dead in your tracks, surprised by the sudden wave of intensity. “I was gone for two hours. I was grocery shopping,” you say, already regretting not texting him sooner.

His expression doesn’t change. “Two hours? That’s two hours I had no idea where you were! You could’ve gotten hurt! Kidnapped! I could have sent the team after you!”

You blink, trying to process his frantic words. “It was just the store. I’m fine. I didn’t even leave the neighborhood.”

“But what if something happened?” He’s pacing now, completely ignoring the fact that you’ve been walking around the block for the last hour. “You could have been in danger, and I wouldn’t have even known! What if the old man that looks like Santa Claus down the steep seduced you?”

“What—“

“And was successful. Who am I to Santa? Nothing but a little elf whore…”

“Um.”

“Actually fuck Santa. He ain’t shit.”

“Okay.”

“Anyways, Do you want me to hire bodyguards?”

“I’m not a delicate flower,” you say, trying to stay calm. “You don’t have to act like I’m going to break if I leave for an hour.”

He stops pacing, suddenly pulling you into a tight hug, his arms firm but careful. “I know, I know. You once broke my back when we were roleplaying WWE. And in be—“

“Oi.”

“Besides! You’re my responsibility. I need you safe.”

You sigh, your annoyance melting away as his possessiveness becomes more endearing than aggravating. “You’re a freak, you know that?”

He smiles into your shoulder, his tone softened. “And you match it~”

You couldn’t deny that.

You’re lounging on the couch, scrolling through your phone, when you hear the front door open. Your boyfriend walks in, holding two absurdly oversized leather jackets with a grin that suggests he’s up to no good.

“Guess what I got!” he announces.

You glance at him, already sensing where this is going. “What now?”

“Matching jackets,” he says, looking far too pleased with himself for someone who just spent way too much money on something totally unnecessary.

You look at the jackets, confused. “Those things are huge. They’ll swallow me whole.”

“Nonsense!” He’s practically bouncing with excitement. “It’s part of the look. Look how badass we’ll look together. We’ll be like this power couple!”

You pull the jacket on, and it nearly engulfs you. You feel like you’re drowning in leather, and you can barely move your arms.

You glance at him. “This is a terrible idea. I can’t even lift my arms.”

He looks at you with a deadpan stare. “Exactly. That’s the point. We’re untouchable.”

You sigh, crossing your arms, trying not to let the ridiculousness of the situation break your composure. “You realize we’re going to look like two absolute try-hards?”

“Nope.”

He shrugs, unfazed. “I look hot. You look hot. Who cares about looking normal when you look cool?”

You snort, rolling your eyes. “We look like walking couches.”

It happens when you’re having an absolutely normal movie night. Popcorn, blankets, a chilled drink. Everything’s perfect. And then, in the middle of a dramatic scene, your boyfriend suddenly turns to you with a completely straight face.

“I killed someone today,” he says, his voice holding the same tone if he just did a wet fart. “45 years old. Kids. Pretty tragic, actually. But he had it coming. I mean he did—”

You freeze, popcorn halfway to your mouth. “Wait. What?”

He shrugs, clearly uninterested in your reaction. “Yeah, I mean, he was a threat. Had to be dealt with. He won’t be a problem anymore.”

“Are you… are you serious?” You blink rapidly, your mind struggling to catch up with what you just heard.

“Yeah, well, that’s gang life for you.” He leans back, popping a piece of popcorn in his mouth like he’s just told you about his day at the office. “It’s not all fun and games, y’know.”

You can’t form a coherent response, too shocked by the casual way he talks about murder. “You just… killed someone. And then sat down to watch a movie?”

He glances at you, unphased. “Yeah, and? We were supposed to watch this, right? Can we watch breaking bad next? Bald Walter is spank bank material.”

“Um ew.”

“Just don’t sweat the small stuff, babe.”

You stare at him in silence for a moment, the absurdity of the situation slowly sinking in. “You are the weirdest person I’ve ever met.”

“Thanks. I try.” He says it so casually, then immediately falls asleep like it’s just another day.

What the hell.

Don't mind me, I'll just sit here waiting for the next chapters like a good girl.

Mafia AU Masterlist

Pairing : Mafia!141 x Showgirl/Law Student!Reader

Synopsis: You’re a law student who performs shows at night, and you catch the eyes of a group of dangerous man.

CW: May contain mature content, poly relationship, afab!reader, very suggestive themes, and violence, manipulative behavior, stalking.

Statues : ongoing

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

Part 6

Part 7

Part 8

[More to come]

🍑I do not authorize others to translate or republish my work on any other platform, or through any AI programs.

Bruce: Okay, let me get this straight-

Tim: More like let me get this bi you. 

Jason: Let us ace-ess the situation. 

Dick: Let’s see how this pans out.

Damian: I’m gay. 

Bruce: 

Bruce: That’s all great and all, but WHO IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THE KITCHEN FIRE?! 

"oh, you wouldn't know it, it's in a different language"

"you read a lot, right?"

"yes!"

"what are some books you've read recently?"

"uhh i don't remember"

Barty, in flirtatious voice: Everyone says that I'm crazy. And they're right. I am. Crazy about you.

Evan: That's so sweet... But also you're crazy- like bat shit crazy.

Barty: That's not very nice of you to say.

Regulus: Barty, you're literally strapped to a metal bed in a mental health institute.

Pandora: In a closed ward.

Dorcas: So maybe stop with the flirting and let us save you.

Going to use this so much

The Complete DICKtionary

Or Robinese (or maybe you prefer the spelling Dick-tionary), whatever floats your boat. I wish people used all of these more often, they’re g-r-e-a-t. Including future slang + defenitions AND when it was first used for your pleasure!

Dick’s “unwords”:

Dick Grayson does NOT like affixes, and creates a-fix for them. Not all of these are opposites of an existing word though, and some are more punny than anything! In alphabetical order they are…

aster — a situation with good circumstance, a good positive experience. Opposite of disaster.

First used in: Schooled (01x05).

In a sentence: “If ‘dislike’ is the opposite of ‘like’, is ‘disaster’ the opposite of ‘aster’?”

concerted* — not worried, calm and composed. Opposite of disconcerted.

First used in: Drop-Zone (01x04)

In a sentence: “This mosquito’s mighty concerted over your pain.”

chalant — displaying anxiety, interest or enthusiasm. Opposite of nonchalant.

First used in: Alpha Male (01x13)

In a sentence: “Be as chalant as you’d like.”

ject** — to get rid off what’s left. 

First used in: Terminus (03x23)

In a sentence: “Now, let’s ject the rest!”

outfiltrate — infiltrating an infiltrator and disposing of them. Opposite of infiltrate.

First used in: Infiltrator (01x06)

In a sentence: “The infiltrators have been out-filtrated!”

renial — refusing to admit the truth or reality of something. Opposite of a being in denial.

First used in: The Pit (tie-in comic issue #11)

In a sentence: “You’re in denial Ra’s, ever though of being in ‘re-nial’ instead?”

sheveled — ordered, kept in a tidy way. Opposite of disheveled.

First used in: The Pendulum (tie-in comic issue #12)

In a sentence: “Really though he’d be a little less sheveled after that.”

turbed — being in a good state of mind or to be calm. Opposite of disturbed.

First used in: Welcome to Happy Harbour (01x03).

In a sentence: “Let’s see if you’re more turbed once we kick your can!”

traught — to stop worrying, to keep calm. Opposite of distraught.

First used in: Homefront (01x12)

In a sentence: “Well, get traught or get dead!”

whelmed*** — being level-headed or experiencing an event that falls neither below or above expectations. A “between word” for underwhelmed and overwhelmed.

First used in: Independence Day (01x01).

In a sentence: “You’re overwhelmed, Freeze was underwhelmed. Why isn’t anyone ever just whelmed?”

Bart’s future slang:

Bart Allen comes from 40 years in the future, and brought back some slang**** (and derivatives) that now everyone uses. Surprisingly, there hasn’t been a time paradox because of this. Yet.

crash — something good, awesome and rebellious.

First time used: Bloodlines (02x06)

In a sentence: “That’s so crash!”

meat — a derogary term for a non-Reach organic lifeform.

First time used: Salvage (02x04)

In a sentence: “Half the meat at Comic-Con is from my era.”

mode — feeling down or being defeated.

First time used: Bloodlines (02x06)

In a sentence: “Feeling the mode.”

Thanks for reading, now go and unleash your inner Dick and Bart to infect your friends with some nonsense blather!

*this is already a real word, not something Dick made up. It is still counted in the DICKtionary though.

**plenty of prefixes would suffice for “ject” (e-, sub-, re-, de-), and all of them are used. Also, Wally was the one who said “ject” first!

***technically, the word “whelmed” serves the same purpose as “overwhelmed”, with the latter being a word that superseded the former. This is apparently NOT the case on Earth-16, as no one actually corrects Dick on it (not even Artemis, who’s a college-level English proffesor). Who knew?

****please note that these words have different meanings depending on who uses them. To the Reach, “crashing the mode” refers to a loss of control or failure. Humans have inverted it, and to them it means success. The future slang defenitions are from the human perspective and it’s thus why it’s reffered to Bart’s future slang.

UNCASUAL REMINDER!!!!!!!

if you’re MAGA, if you’re racist, if you’re homophobic, if you’re transphobic, if you’re not a feminist, if you’re not against deportation, if you’re against abortions, if you like the orange man, if you’re pro israel

BLOCK ME RIGHT NOW!!!!

didn’t think i’d have to say it again but ig i do!!

I love this, definitely going to try this at some point

Y/n at home alone.

*phone rings*

Y/n: Mr. Sexy's pizza, the special is sexeroni

Billy, as Ghostface: *watching her answer from the window* .....

Stu: *cackling up with laughter*

Billy: *dial tone*

This is so good!!

The Waynes' Nanny Chapters

Batfamily and Reader, Bruce Wayne x Reader

Ao3

Summary: One day, after getting fired from your job by your ex, you somehow ended up in Wayne Manor as the family's new nanny. Working with six kids is tough enough, but the handsome, rich, and emotionally confused father, billionaire Bruce Wayne, who is just too charming makes it a bit more difficult as your feelings for him confuse you. Nonetheless, you love the job and the kids, but soon enough you realize that maybe you're falling in love with the boss, too.

The Pilot Pt. 1 The Pilot Pt. 2 9 to 5 (Metaphorically) The Talk Plus One Take Your Nanny to Work Day The Night Time Routine Nanny In the Attic Lonely Hearts Club Book Shop Nanny Runaways My Type of Nanny A Nanny's Ballet Ex in the House Master & Servant Front Page Scandal Three's a Crowd Spilled Tea Iceberg Lounge

I feel this so much, sometimes it's nice and strange and awkward and beautiful to finally be seen by the right people

Thinking about designationless reader...

Imagine how alone she must've been for all her life. It started since she was young, her parents pushing her to the corner of the home, away from the family, and naturally, her siblings would follow their parents' lead, pointedly ignoring her, and finding any excuse available to be out of her presence. She wouldn't understand them anyway, she can't tell the difference between noises nor could she even recognize scents. It just wouldn't work.

Reader thinks that maybe she could find someone, anyone in school, but kids are like sharks, except instead of smelling blood, they smell the lack of all scents on her. Most kids have a combination of their own and their family members' scents. Reader has nothing, so everyone continues the pattern, but now with more stares and jeers and hushed giggles. Reader knows that bullying is bad, but anything would be better than simply not existing to anyone. That's what the others say, at least, that she's nothing, nobody. Never to her face, though, just in the whispers shared between friends.

She eventually tries to find others like her through the wonders of the internet. There's maybe a handful more scattered in her country, but none are her age, and all have their own families who care about them. Was it just her who wasn't deserving of love, of connection? Reader reaches out to them, and they talk a little, but before long, through no one's fault, it falls through. She was bad at talking anyway, even if she doesn't have to worry about scents or sounds that aren't there, she never knew much about context or connotation. She never had the opportunity to learn about the intricacies in communication. Reader is back alone.

The military eventually scouts her, and it's the first time anyone has ever really looked at her. Sure, they look at her like a valuable tool, but a tool is better than nothing. Reader obviously joins, desperate for crumbs. She climbs the ranks, gets the job done. She is good at her job, so people respect her. She learns how to talk professionally, emails, texts, and so one, but no one talks to her on leave. No one invites her to the pub after a good mission. No one even talks to her in the mess. But people do talk to her when they have to, and that's enough. Maybe she even gets a callsign. Doe. After Jane Doe, the placeholder name for unknown individuals, and insult if anything.

Now there's the 141. They invite her to things. They talk to her. They touch her. Reader exists for them. She isn't just an unknown person stuck in the background and invisible to everyone else, and Reader doesn't know what to do. Her speech is awkward and overly professional, even in personal settings. How is she supposed to be friends with someone, multiple someones? How is she supposed to move? To act? To express? She doesn't know, but she really wants to learn. At least now she has good teachers.

ANON YOU GENIUSSSS okay but this? Perfect. AHHHH I ADORE THIS IDEA!! Esp the jane doe callsign omg yes

You weren’t used to being seen.

Growing up, you learned quickly how to make yourself small- how to exist quietly, without taking up space, without asking for too much. Because the few times you had asked- asked for a hug, asked to be let into the nest, asked why you felt so different- the answers had all been the same.

No.

Not now.

Not you.

It wasn’t that your parents didn’t love you. You were sure they did, in their own way. But love was hard to feel when your mother flinched at your touch like you were something disgusting, when your father sighed like he was tired every time you entered the room as if you were taking up space he was saving for his other children. When your siblings built their nests without you, curling into piles of warmth and safety while you sat outside the door, knees pulled to your chest and hands balled into fists to keep them from knocking, a cold ache burrowing itself in your chest.

You stopped knocking eventually.

You stopped trying.

You used to wonder if you’d done something wrong- if maybe you could fix yourself and everything would go back to normal. But it wasn’t something you could fix. It was just… you.

Scentless.

Designationless.

Invisible.

School had been worse, perhaps the worst. At least your family had pretended not to notice how different you were. The other kids didn’t bother pretending. They stared openly, whispered behind your back, laughed when you walked by. You’d caught bits and pieces of what they said- weird, wrong, broken, as if they hoped by having you hear their words, they’d convince you to leave at last.

You’d started keeping your head down after that, slipping through the halls like a shadow. No one talked to you unless they had to, and even then they either did it with a mocking, jeering tone that echoes in your nightmares or with a meek tone; as if your lack of everything is contagious. No one sat next to you at lunch, either. When partners were assigned, you always ended up working alone per your teachers’ instructions.

It was easier that way.

At least, that’s what you told yourself.

By the time you joined the military, you’d gotten good at being alone. You didn’t need friends. Didn’t need packmates. You had work, and work didn’t care if you were quiet or awkward or too stiff to laugh at the right jokes. Work didn’t care if you flinched when people got too close or froze when someone raised their voice. Work demanded to be done, and you had nothing and no one to stop you from that.

But the military also has the same teens who used to bully you so consistently. Rookies all to ready and happy to lord over you. It’s how you get your despised callsign, Doe. Jane Doe. A cruel mockery, comedy wherein you are the joke that has the world laughing.

Still, you wear it. It’s still an acknowledgment and that will always be better than never being seen. You flit from team to team, unit to unit, always an observer from afar, watching everyone around you speak a language you can’t.

But the 141 was different, when you eventually end up working for them.

They cared.

They cared in ways you weren’t ready for.

Soap was relentless, dragging you into conversations even when you barely knew what to say. He filled the silences like it didn’t bother him, kept talking for the both of you, lounging against you unbothered, until you started talking back. Gaz was gentlest, steadier. He never pushed, just lingered close enough to remind you he was there, waiting, whenever you were ready. Quiet, silent acceptance you’d never been given before, and you were yet far too afraid to so easily cling to it.

And the Alphas- Price and Ghost- were worse.

Price had a way of looking at you that made your chest ache, like he saw you, really saw you, and didn’t mind what he found. Scentless, with no designation and all. Ghost was quieter, sharper, but his eyes tracked you everywhere, presence wrapping around you like he was staking a claim you didn’t understand, like he was teying to etch every part of you behind his eyelids.

You didn’t know what to do with it.

They didn’t give you space. They sat next to you at meals, tugged you along when they went out for drinks, called you over during breaks like it was the most natural thing in the world. And it felt natural- until it didn’t, because sometimes you still felt like an outsider.

Like you didn’t belong.

You tried to hide it, but they saw through you. They always did, and they never shied away.

When you started avoiding the mess hall, it was Gaz who caught you, shoving a plate of food into your hands and dragging you to sit with him like it wasn’t a big deal. When you hung back during missions, letting the others fall into their pack dynamics without you, Soap was the one who looped an arm around your shoulders and pulled.

And when you flinched, once, at the sharp sound of someone’s voice echoing down the hall- when you tensed so hard it made your fingers tremble- it was Price who closed the distance, standing in front of you like a wall and letting Ghost linger at your back. Neither of them said a word.

They didn’t have to.

You weren’t used to being protected. You weren’t used to belonging.

But they made it hard not to.