Damn... Maybe I am a man....
things you DO NOT need to be a man
a dick
he/him pronouns
XY chromosomes
things you DO need to be a man
the swiftness of a coursing river
the force of a great typhoon
the strength of a raging fire
the mysteriousness of the dark side of the moon
^this post was brought to you by LGBT^
Let's
Get down to
Business
To defeat the huns
Why are all of these so good?! Why can't I write this good?!
🖤 "Lick me like a lollipop" (Billy Loomis x GN reader)
🖤 "Lick me like a lollipop" (Part 2)
🖤 "I told you they were witches, man" Scream (1996) x The Craft (1996)
🖤 "I dare you to kiss my Tatum" (Stu Macher x Tatum Riley x Fem Reader)
🖤 "Why me?" (Billy Loomis x Stu Macher x AFAB reader)
🖤 Modern Billy Loomis and Stu Macher concept
🖤 Phone sex with Billy Loomis || Modern Scream concept (AFAB reader x Billy Loomis)
🖤 Dilf! Billy x AFAB reader
🖤 Poly!Ghostface - Knife play 🗡️ with Billy Loomis and Stu Macher
🖤 Goth reader x Billy Loomis and Stu Macher
🖤 Fem reader who's protective over Billy Loomis and Stu Macher
🖤 Virgin reader x experienced Billy Loomis
🖤 After sex mushy attention for Billy Loomis
🖤 Rough sex with Stu Macher
🖤 Vampire!Billy Loomis and Stu Macher
🖤 Fem reader discovers that Billy Loomis and Stu Macher are the killers
🖤 Fem reader gets Billy Loomis tattooed on her hip
🖤 AFAB reader babied by Billy Loomis and Stu Macher
🖤 Period sex with Billy Loomis
🖤 NSFW Bloger: AFAB reader x Billy Loomis
🖤 You find out your best friend, Stu Macher is the killer, (ft. Billy Loomis)
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3
Regulus: …So I just let them have it
Barty: *shocked gasp*
Regulus: what? I have a heart
Barty: *even bigger gasp*
Evan: tsk no no it doesn’t prove anything. it could still be made out of stone.
This is such a fun idea. I'm half tempted to write my own story like this😍
"THE WAYNE SIBLINGS READ THIRST TWEETS"
requested by anon
summary: the internet is horny for you, your brothers suffer for it.
pairings: platonic! dick grayson, jason todd, tim drake x batsis! reader
A/N: 18+, on account of horny twitter users ;)
You and your brothers are lined up in a semi-circle, Dick, you, Jason then Tim, each of you sporting different expressions as the cameras begin rolling.
You and Dick are cheerful mirrors of each other, while Jason and Tim look like they'd rather be anywhere but here as the four of you settle into place.
"So today we're going to have you reading thirst tweets, but the twist is, they're all about your sister." The producer says from out of frame. Abruptly, your brother's moods swing violently.
"No!" Dick cheers, the blinding smile plastered across his face never even twitching.
Jason's frown has evolved from "mildly disgruntled" to "about to start shooting people."
Tim, meanwhile, appears to have stopped working altogether. "Timmers?" You giggle, waving a hand across his face.
"Ew... I mean, people find you attractive?" He scrunches up his nose, and your face turns murderous.
"RIGHT! Listen here you little - " you lean across Jason to strangle your little brother when a giggle from somewhere on set reminds you where you are, and you paste on a practised grin.
"I can see why Damian wasn't invited now."
"None of us should have been invited, this shouldn't be happening." Tim mumbled with a thousand yard stare.
Relishing in his stress, you quickly pull a piece of paper from the oversized thirst jug, staring directly at Tim as you read. "Bruce Wayne's daughter could smack me across the face with a brick and I’d say ‘thank you, mommy’"
Tim dry heaves, face a little green.
"Damn, now I can never use that in bed again." Jason grumbles, causing Dick to spit out his water as Tim gags once more.
"You're disgusting." He kicks Jason as you hum in consideration.
"I don't know, I think I could get behind it."
"Never speak again, actually." Tim fires back.
"Well, if you liked that, then you'll love this one: Sit on my face, I'll pay you, anything! please, SIT ON MY FACE! SIT ON MY-” Dick, who's only just recovered from his previous near death experience starts choking again, making you hit his back a little harder than strictly necessary.
Jason starts attempting to take the jug off your hands, but you quickly dance out of the way, "Oh look, this one's not even that bad." Your brothers look sceptical, but they don't stop you, "She's so fine, I'd kill a man just to breathe the same air as her."
"What is with people and committing crimes?" Jason seems genuinely concerned. How chronically offline of him.
"I attract a very passionate demographic." You shrug.
"You attract future convicts," Dick mutters in devastation.
A shit eating grin covers your face as you read the next one, having lulled them into a false sense of security.
"Need her to pull on my hair like a leash as she fucks me into next week with the strap." Dick wails, falling sideways off the chair like a fainting Victorian woman.
"Hmm, you want the pink or the green one, baby?" you smile seductively at the camera.
"That's it! You're done, you're done!" Jason lunges for you at the same time as Dick, your older brother getting the jug whilst you're hauled over Jason's shoulder.
You shriek, but you refused to be deterred, unfolding one of the papers you'd managed to grab before Dick attempted to thwart your fun. "Not to be dramatic, but if Jason’s sister looked me in the eye and said ‘kneel’, I’d hit the floor so fast I’d break my - hey."
Tim pulls the paper from your hands, staring at it like it killed his puppy. "Why are you encouraging this?" Tim gestures accusingly at the Buzzfeed staff members laughing behind the cameras, before he does a double take at the twitter handle.
"Wait... This is from Roy's Twitter account!" Tim yells, whirling on Jason like he's personally responsible for all of his grievances.
"There's one here from Conner too," You clear your throat, holding the paper far above Tim's head with your superior height courtesy of Jason's unwilling help, "I’d treat you right. You ever want someone to make you cum till you forget your own name, hit me up babe."
Your brothers scream, and you’re having so much fun that you only mildly worry about Conner’s safety in the near future.
(You wonder if you’ll have time to take him up on his offer before his inevitable funeral.)
The video ends with a message flashing across the screen: "Several of the tweets submitted came from Wally West's Twitter account. Some were deemed too explicit to share."
Amazing
September 19th ~Rosekiller ~ Word Count: 316 ~ Prompt: Cheek @rosekillermicrofic
⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆
Evan stopped Barty in the doorway, “You're drunk. Stay somewhere else.”
Barty recoiled, “Excuse me?”
“You need to go.”
“Don't tell me what to do.” He shot back.
“You know, maybe I’d be nicer if you weren’t drinking yourself to death.”
“Oh, fuck this. I'm leaving. I’ll be the good guy and turn the other cheek.”
“The good guy? You're always manipulating me!”
“Bullshit! I’m not the one kickin’ you out!”
“You just always need a reaction from me. Why? Does it get you off? Is that it? Is it some sick fantasy of yours?”
“Shut up!” Barty shouted.
Evan kept going, “Why me, huh? I'm the only one you do this to. Does making me angry turn you on? Did it finally click that you're just a pathetic, sadistic, closeted little-”
“SHUT THE FUCK UP!” Barty's words echoed in the silent room. He sighed, “You're right. I- I don't know how to... I'm in love with you, okay?” He blurted, "And I hurt you because it was easier than facing the truth."
It was a while before Evan managed to speak,
"You love me?" He whispered. Barty nodded,
"I always have."
Evan blew out a breath, “I love you too... Even though you’re a fucking maniac.”
Barty snorted, his eyes filled with tears, "Like you aren't just as crazy."
They jumped when a voice came from nowhere,
“Finally.” Regulus groaned, “I’ve been waiting for three years.”
“When the fuck did you get here?”
Regulus rolled his eyes, “I’ve been here all morning, nitwit. I’m still waiting for you idiots to kiss.”
Evan looked back to find Barty was already staring, he looked nervous.
Evan didn’t hesitate, surging forward to kiss the absolute mess of a fucking man that he loved with all his heart.
Sure, they were toxic, maybe even a little insane. But somehow, they worked. And what kind of love isn’t a little crazy?
I'M IN LOVE!!! WHY IS IT SO GOOD?! MADE ME SOB AND BLUSH FOR WHAT?!?!😭
Ghoap/Reader—Desperate for a place to stay, you answer an ad and become the roommate of two disabled vets.
Part One—You answer an ad
Part Two—You hear too much
Part Three—You smoke with Johnny
Part Four—You get drunk
Part Five—Simon and Johnny talk
Part Six—Everyone comes clean
Part Seven—You kiss Johnny
Part Eight—Everyone watches a movie
Part Nine
Sobbing, be right back 💔🥹
hello! Since you said you’re taking marauders fanart requests:
can you draw a fluffy dorlene one of them cuddling on a couch, or a really sad one of bartys reaction to regulus/evan’s death, or to both? If not it’s perfectly fine. have a great day/night and remember to take care of yourself!
<3
as much as i love angst i do also adore familial league of assassins shit, and since i keep seeing them on my tiktok fyp i cant stop thinking about those videos of idiot teenagers in military training being. teenagers. and thinking of jason and damian. just those two having weird little gimmicks and traditions that confuse the absolute fuck out of the rest of the family from their time at the league.
damian will refer to grapes as ‘assassination implements’ because of that time jason tried to throw one at him, missed, hit ra’s in the back of the head, and to avoid getting out of trouble gaslit him into believing it must have been some kind of dart that hit him from a coup attempt. ra’s went into lockdown and had the entire base searched and jason’s been lying about it for a year, nodding along whenever ra’s brings up the ‘irritating failure that escaped capture’.
nanda parbat had a specific bar that a lot of the assassins would go to when off-duty for a break, but damian wasn’t allowed because talia said he was too young so jason and a couple other loa workers dressed him up in fake facial hair and convinced the bartender he was just a really short old guy to get him in, and since then whenever they talk about something damian’s done that he wasn’t supposed to do they say it was ‘old man brutus’ that did it. bruce has no idea who the fuck brutus is or why two of his sons find his existence so amusing.
whenever the assassins were fucking around on loa grounds they would have a specific low-down gravely tone of voice that when any of them saw talia or ra’s approach, they would use to warn the rest of the group by saying ‘al ghul’ in that tone to indicate everyone had to straighten up and act like they were training. damian can copy that tone perfectly, and will use that voice when saying non-sensical words like ‘ooby-dooby’ and ‘birch tree’ because the tone makes jason instinctively straight up and whirl around like a soldier hearing the word ‘sergeant’. it works every fucking time.
one of damian’s tutors and jason’s mission colleague hated coconut milk with a fucking passion and would rant about it every time it was brought up in conversation. a lot of the guys would take bets on how long she could go talking about it and then purposely brought it up to set her off as a game. every time anyone around the loa base was seen with coconut milk somebody would respond ‘what would eden say if she saw you with that?’. tim dick and bruce do not know who eden is or why they hate coconut milk and at this point they’re too scared to ask.
all im saying is the loa becomes much funnier if we consider it just to be a very strict assassin boarding school that jason attended and damian grew up in.
This was beautiful, absolutely and truly beautiful, I can't wait to see where it goes
Undoing Fate
neglected to regressor batsis! reader x platonic batfam
what if after 20 years of neglect from your family full of vigilantes, you face an unfortunate death, only to find yourself regressed back to when you were 16?
⤷ lots of emotional neglect, reader was batgirl, reader was a tryhard and an overachiever, reader had no social life in her first life, mentions of drugs, mentions of human trafficking, mentions of death, regression themes, toxic and unhealthy relationships, dysfunctional family, toxic mentalities, reader and everyone else needs therapy…, canon divergence, major character death(s) | tba | based on this
⤷ info! (background) 1 | 2 | read this first to understand the plot and each batfam better :)
⤷ art!!! 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5
⤷ if you’re bored m.list
00 | And she cried over nothing
01 | Sixteen again
02 | A quitter? | ?
03 | Everything is awesome…
04 | Until it’s not | .
05 | Untouched memories
06 | Another suffocating day | .
07 | —
08 |
taglist is closed‼️
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(2/3) @animegirlfromvietnam @estreiiuh @simply-lovely78 @twismare @ssak-i @g4bbi3xx @buddee @alor-thes @kiyoramen @weirdothatreads @bat1212 @actuallysleepingrn @k1arar3 @zelabee @just-pure-trash @mindless-rock @heartjwonie @nickey-diano @goldfishsmemory @infirebaby @thephantomdanny @madkill44 @w31rd3rg1rl @fishstcks @yvesnoteve @otterluver05 @lilithskywalker @vanilliona @definitely-not-sammie @strwberryglass @f0rtunej @cottage-worm @darkfaethedestroyer @cloudserenity @bigchungusdrinksspritecranberry @cooldeermagazine @fightmebissh @fantasyhopperhea @sirenetheblogger @dind1n @stupidvodkka @lilithquillete @unamused-boss @insomniaccorner @paastaboi @octavius-world @yukixies @imguce @jellyedkazoo @jsprien213 @bad4amficideas @farmerboywakatoshikun-blog @rissareader @itsberrydreemurstuff @i-am-here3 @eyeless-kun @jayjayjayson @rosy-myhouse34 @verypersonadazzel @ehh-im-just-here-to-read @thesehandsarerated-e
(3/3) @glitchmshade @prongs-moon @jjllmx @thegothamsiren @v3vina @levi-09 @leovergurl @dazailover4ever @sofiaswrittendelusions @yukinaabutlazy @sbrewer21 @ryuushou @batboygirlie @simp-hub
(idk why i can’t tag some of y’all, must be your settings i think 😓) (or let me know if i accidentally spelt ur user wrongly 😭💀)
I'm a Barbie Girl, in the Barbie world!!!
The real barbie is Y/n.
Y/n’s a doctor, a cop, a scientist, an agent, vet, hero, villain, astronaut, lawyer, spy, criminal, artist, chef, engineer, psychologist, architect, journalist, firefighter, event planner, mechanic, photographer, musician, actor, interior designer, bartender, fashion designer, barista, florist, forensic scientist, flight attendant, profiler, tour guide, translator, etc.
Man, poor price, he's not that old
Price who rethinks about his life choices when his kid asks him what year he was born just for them to say "Wow, you're old daddy! Were dinosaurs scary?"
Simon who was teaching his little girl some carpentry because it wasn't just a boy's job, right? Of course it isn't! But he does internally cringe when his kid grabs a nearby hammer due to curiosity and drops it on his foot.
Kyle who silently gulps nervously & you see sweat forming at his forehead when his kid goes up to him and asks help with their homework (Not that he's stupid or anything, he's a grown man after all, just genuinely doesn't want to get anything wrong.)
John who had to witness first hand how honest and mean children were when his own child came up to him, all smiles at first just to say– "You're hair looks a little weird, daddy." Then runs off to continue doing whatever.
(uhh im a different person at night, if this is bad, blame them not me)
24 ~ Capricorn ~ very delusional if you couldn't tell by the way I'm on this app...
69 posts