Watching Our Flag Means Death Reminds Me How Much I Fucking Hate Those Lace Sleeve Cuff Things. My Least

People on twitter “omg I hope one day we get an Andrew pov.” I actually don’t want that ever bc I’m pretty sure I’ll drive my car to a lake and put a brick on the gas pedal

Happy birthday Foundations of Decay!!

Walking around my college campus and looking at the different students is like:

Student A: A literal child

Student B: A grown man with a mortgage and 401k

Then it turns out B is a freshman and A is a senior

The Kraken listens to My Chemical Romance. Edward Teach listens to All Too Well (10 Minute Version) on repeat

I will not be taking questions at this time

“this sets a bad precedent people are gonna start going up to comedians and punching them during their routines” promise?

I actually think there should be more street justice at the Academy Awards, keeps you humble

Don’t even get me started on this fucking freak.

Bro’s dogs are absolutely GRIPPING that chair

Started reading Death Note for the first time and man, I gotta give it up for my guy Ryuk. Man showed up blinged out and seems to barely have a clue what’s going on. He has no dog in this fight. Just gonna watch this teenager try to become god and look cool as hell while doing it

ROMANTIC MERCENARY: I'll kill anyone... for the right woman

KINDHEARTED BANDIT: cough up yer coin! if you've any to spare that is. I know times are tough. I'm here for you

GNOMISH NEW YORKER: oh my god they hit the twin mushrooms. oh my god its gnine gneleven

guys be like omg i hate cancel culture. my brother in christ u just said the n word