Emptyspaxes - Bisho

Some things I do to help manage my depression after a manic episode:

Find a good audiobook to listen to so i don't have to waste energy actually reading

Limit my time on social media

Let myself indulge in video games when I'm off work

Always have frozen foods for any meal in the freezer. I have pancakes and these honey meat and cheese crescent rolls I made for breakfast. I have random staples for other meals like diced cooked chicken, different types of veggies, mini potstickers, egg rolls, a pizza, etc

Stay stocked up with all sorts of soups. Sometimes a hot bowl of nutritious soup will set me right for an hour or so

Stretch in the morning and try to have a sip of water after

Use a water flosser and mouth wash when I don't want to brush my teeth

I like to make pasta sauce in bulk and freeze it so I always have fresh pasta sauce on hand

I make indulgent dessert teas with way too much sugar and chocolate

Make myself do a single chore a day no matter how awful it is. I sometimes cry the entire time even. Just 1 though dealers choice. I usually make the bed or do a load of laundry if I'm out of underwear

Blast music

If I feel the need to hurt myself, I do an intense workout instead

Sit in a small, dark room with a soft blanket and let myself be angry and sad and cry and kick and yell. I find being able to get the emotions out like this helps me a lot

Go to bed early and sleep in a bit

Play games on my phone instead of doomscrolling

Make myself have a glass of water in between other drinks so I can at least be semi hydrated. I get dehydrated very easy and it makes my mental worse

Give myself sweet treats as rewards. Things I normally wouldn't ever get

Go sit by the water and watch the snails or crabs walk around

Everyone is different so these things may or may not help you and that's ok. I'm just sharing things that help me. Some definitely take a lot of energy to do and I've found that pushing myself a little more every day helps me recover faster as long as it's paired with plenty of sleep and rest otherwise.

@ everyone who went through a period of having no friends, who ate alone, who had a point in their life where they were too embarrassed to tell their parents they had no one to play with after school: I love you. I know it hurts and I know it’s hard but it’s not your fault. Things will grow and change. You will find people who you click with and they will love you too. You deserve positive friendship relationships just like anyone else. And if you’re still going through this phase, you’re strong, and things will change for you too. You are not alone, there are people experiencing the same thing you are, find them, you deserve positivity and companionship. Keep your head up.

Me, right after I get a new diagnosis: HA, I knew it! All those crappy doctors who told me I was faking it were WRONG! This is great news!

Me, several hours later when the news actually hits me: *sobs alone in my room*

fatima aamer bilal, from weeping flesh above the ground.

[text id: the design of this universe is so damned, // i got to hold your limp body before i got to hold your hand.]

Early Diagnosed Autistic peeps and Loss of Autonomy

I honestly get depressed reading my reports when I got diagnosed with autism when I was 5. Development delay, underachiever in language skills, reasoning skills, fine motor impairment, lack of speech fluency and lack of self esteem (no really I was terribly anxious).

I had interventions to improve my skills I can’t deny that. but at the cost of pathologizing me and making my mom dreadful of my prognosis. My childhood was me being aware of my pathological nature and that is traumatizing enough.

Bc I have this constant need to prove I’m able enough and I’m not too disabled that is costing too much of my mental health. I’m concerned about many today early diagnosed autistic kids. They come from a age where there is a lot of misinformation that their parents follow either to “treat their symptoms” or just to reinforce their ableist bias.

Besides that early diagnosed kids tend to have way less autonomy than their NT peers. We lose our position to speak so that our parents and institutions can speak over us in their own limited lenses. That is traumatizing. That is why you don’t hear a lot of early diagnosed kids’ perspectives. Not because they tend to be the ones with more limitations to speak as people want us to believe and there is AAC for a reason. Not just because it’s more difficult to have a ealy diagnosis. it’s ableism.

A chronic loss of autonomy and infantilization. Always being spoke over because they just keep assume that you can’t. You can’t speak for yourself. Well here is a thing. WE CAN SPEAK FOR OURSELVES.

I can. I always could given the proper accommodations. I knew what I needed to say. But after spending too much time unable to speak for myself took me a toll and now I become angry when I feel like people know better about my needs than me. Therefore, I’m perpetually mad.

can i call you back im doing something weird

Oh! Aiden now see Aiden old rb is poof and now Aiden need make define.

Ok so

Level 1: low support need, can do most/all basic thing by self

Level 2: medium support need, can do some thing by self but maybe need help with basic thing or have hard basic thing

Level 3: high support need, not able do most/all basic thing by self or have many many hard basic thing

Person able be between level!

notes for my impostor syndrome:

• no, it's not painful to walk for abled-bodied people

• no, healthy people don't usually use every chance they get to lean against walls or sit down

• no, ableds don't dream about shower stool

• no, ableds don't celebrate days when they're not in pain. because usually they're not in pain

• no, ableds don't want to stop walking mid-way, lay down on the ground, curl up and cry and whine from pain

• no, ableds aren't exhausted by their own bodies 24/7

just because my aac device is a phone, doesn't mean it is any less crucial that i have it with me.

just because you understand what it is like to have your phone die. and understand that you've lost access to important text and call communication, as well as photos, bank stuff, social media etc, does NOT mean you get to say you know what it's like when my phone dies.

yeah, your phone has emotional and functional significance to you,

🌹but this is my fucking voice.

“glued to his phone” “so much screen time” "get off your phone and have a real conversation for once"

🌹this is my voice.