Hazbin Hotel X Kitsune! Reader

prompt: Xiaojiao waking up, very woozy inside a lavish room in Firey Mountain, and can at least turn her head to see a knocked out Xiaotian in the next part of the room as their kidnapper, Red Son enters with some tea

“Hello there!”

Long Xiaojiao raised a brow at the fire demon’s oddly cheerful tone. “Red?” She tried to sit up again. This time, her stomach didn’t lurch. Still, her head ached with the tell-tale signs of a hangover. “What happened?”

Red set the tray down and began to pour the tea. “How much do you remember?”

Xiaojiao’s brows furrowed together. “We went to the club...” she said, foggy memories slipping up. She remembered Red in that gorgeous purple dress and blushing at her and Xiaotian’s matching clubbing outfits. She couldn’t blame him- their butts looked great in those tights. It kind of drifted off after that. “Ugh...I think...” She lied down with a groan. “I don’t remember.”

The scent of tea entered her nose and she sat up with another groan. Xiaojiao accepted the cup of tea from Red, taking a slow sip. “You and Noodle Boy got dared to do shots.” he explained. Oh, that would explain the lack of memory.

Hopefully Pigsy never found out.

“Then these two idiots decided to try and make a move on you,” Red’s smile faded. He looked away with a hiss before continuing with “And I decided to ask you two something I’ve wanted to for a while.”

Xiaojiao raised a brow. “What?” As she moved to take another sip, something glinting on her wrist caught her eye. She moved the cup to another hand and lifted her hand up. A beautiful golden bracelet, set with small red gems, sat on he wrist.

She turned her head to see Xiaotian. He was spread out in starfish mode, but the wrist she could see had a matching bracelet. When she turned, Red held up his hand. A bracelet with orange and green gems glinted on his wrist.

“I asked if I could court you two and you agreed.”

Xiaojiao blinked and her face warmed. “What?!” she squeaked. Red had asked that to them?! “While we were drunk?” Her thoughts raced back and forth. “Didn’t you think we would change our minds when sober?” She wouldn’t have said no, but still.

Red cocked his head. “Have you changed your mind?”

Xiaojiao blinked, feeling her face warm even more. “Xiaotian,” she hissed in response. Her best friend let out a snore. “Xiaotian!” Even louder. “XIAOTIAN!” Red yelped at her yell. At her loud voice, Xiaotian let out a yelp and fell out of the bed.

He looked up with “Wha-Huh?” He blinked at their surroundings. “What’s going on?”

“Would you want Red to court us?”

Xiaotian blinked again. “Uh, yeah, I-” He raised a brow. “What’s with this bracelet?”

Hopefully, more sobering up would help.

The overwhelming urge for a spooky detective story where you take a boat to a remote island to investigate a series of suspicious murders, and the patron Lovecraftian monster of the town becomes interested in you (to an unhealthy extent). Thus he orders the cult to chase you down and retrieve you. You think they’re trying to kill you, so you do your best to evade their kidnapping attempts. The more aggressive they become, the more certain you are that truth is getting closer. In reality, eldritch creature is just becoming terribly impatient to be in possession of the curious little human.

But wait, now that I’m typing this, an idea occurs to me: the murders are completely unrelated to the cult! You realize it after finally meeting the ancient Beast. He is greatly amused by your detective shenanigans, so he insists on helping you solve the case.

There you have it. Sherlock Holmes with a tentacle Watson who occasionally tries to flirt with you. Next episode: the underground tunnels that lead to the true villain only have one bed available.

OKEY wooloo I love you/p and my brain was so big 5 minutes ago. I was watching a old Philza stream and realized how much that man love axolotls. And so I give you axolotl Reader living in the pond under the bridge between technos and his house. Like they left their old home and wandered around in the snow before just deciding they wanted to life under this cool bridge. And one day Phil and Techno leave their home and there is a person in their pond. Their just chilling. Maybe they have like healing powers and heal Phil’s wing?! I JUST Phil and techno being wholesome with an axolotl reader. And they braid technos hair because their hair is also long and pink so they know all kinds of cool braids. I’m rambling.

-🧇

gills for axolotls are those red/pink whiskers and a dorsal fin is the tail

. . . 

Despite the chill running down your back, you continue to walk. Snow falls gently from above, collecting in piles on the ground below. You huddle into your clothing a bit more, gills tucking in. You left your old house a bit ago to search for supplies but you didn’t expect to get lost so easily. Now, you’re stuck traveling in a snow biome that seems to go on for miles. 

You scoff when you pass by the same tree again, clearly having gone in circles. A shiver racks through your body as it gets darker, night approaching quickly. Your throat feels dry, since you haven’t been in water for a couple hours at this point. You can't even lay in the snow, even if it is essentially frozen water, because that’ll just make you more dehydrated. You’re about to give up, and turn into a different direction when a light from afar catches your attention. It’s faint and flickers in the distance but light could be a sign of life. 

You rush over to the area, nearly tripping when your shoes get caught in the snow. It takes only minutes to find the source, a dim lantern hanging from a fence post. You can spot another lantern in the distance, trailing alongside a partially covered path. You gulp, continuing to follow the trail, hoping that there will be a pool of water nearby. Or, that it’ll lead to a house with someone nice enough inside. Monsters can be heard, gathering around, the dead rising as night nears. You move a little faster, not wanting to fight when you’re this weak. 

A gasp of relief falls from your tongue when you spot houses in the distance. They’re blocked off by a spruce fence, a wooden bridge linking the two together. You push yourself over the fence, grunting when you collapse on the other side. You shiver again and cough lightly. Pushing yourself off of the ground, you run over to the houses. Thoughts rush through your mind, questions and ideas on how to talk to the owners about staying the night. But, the pond underneath the bridge has your excitement flooring. Without a care in the word, you jump into the pond. A tiny squeal lifts from your throat, gills twitching with happiness. Even if the tundra is cold, the water is quite warm in comparison. 

You sink under the surface, tail thumping behind you. You blink a few times to regain your vision, a wide smile forming as you take in the view. This pond is much nicer than the one you live in at home. It’s full of bright colorful coral and tropical fish. You swim around in the water, tail swishing to help you move faster. You greet the fish, waving to them kindly. They simply swim away, only the brave ones approaching. After all, axolotls kill tropical fish for food and fun. But, you never felt the need to follow through with that instinct so they’re safe. 

You dive to the deepest part of the pond, wondering how far it will go. It’s obviously man made, although it is quite wonderful. Feeling drowsy, you lay down on the bottom, near the seagrass. Your large tail curls around your body as you close your eyes. 

.

You continue to stay in the pond for a couple more days, unable to find the will to leave the warm waters. Your home in the swamps couldn’t compare to this place and you really don’t want to attempt traveling home in the snow. You’ve heard the homeowners mingling around, but their voices were always wobbly through the water. They haven’t spotted you yet, since you rarely came up for air. With a large yawn, you swim lazily around the pond. If you decide to stay here, you’ll have to make a house again. Not that you mind, but you don’t have any materials on you. It’s risky to leave the pond to gather wood. 

Your stomach rumbles, the noise sending fish scurrying away. Although the fish have started accepting your presence, they still fear the option of being eaten. You chew on the inside of your cheek, wondering if you could get away with stealing from the homeowners. Would they even notice some food missing? Another grumble and twist in your stomach, makes your whiskers twitch anxiously. You’ll need to get food soon. With that though in mind, you swim to the surface, head barely peeking out of the water. You spin around, gills twisting and turning at the cold wind against your face. 

“Oh, hello there!” A kind voice surprises you from behind. You spin around slowly, scared to see who it is. A tall ghost stands near the pond, his yellow sweater sticking out against the white environment. He smiles, waving gently. A blue sheep bleats softly behind him, moving to approach the edge of the pond. 

“Hello.” You mumble, water ripping from your movements. Maybe if you play dead, he will forget you exist. You don’t have too much time to process that thought, the ghost already sinking to his knees by the water’s edge.

“I’m Ghostbur! Are you a friend of Phil and Techno?” You tilt your head in confusion, mouth opening slightly once you realize they must be the owners of the house. 

“No, uh I just live in this pond.” 

“Oh.” The ghost trails off, unsure of what else to say. “Well, Friend likes you so I think you must be a nice person!” The sheep cries in response, moving forward to sniff in your direction. You’re not sure whether to take that as a compliment or not, either way you give a small note of appreciation. The ghost smiles again. You swim closer, not fearing his presence. 

“Ghostbur, do you have any food on you?” The ghost hums in thought before giving a small ‘nope’. You scrunch up your nose in slight annoyance. Looks like you’ll have to leave to grab something to eat. You lift yourself from the pond, shivering when you touch the snow. 

“Are you leaving so soon?” He seems sad, his eyebrows furrowing. You shake some of the water off of your skin, feeling cold already. 

“Kinda? I need to get food and some supplies so I can make a house in the pond.” You warily glance at the ghost before moving to one of the houses. The first door is locked tight but the second door gives way. Ghostbur follows you inside, his sheep joining along casually. 

You grin, spotting some chests farther inside the house. Moving forward, you quickly search through each of the chests, trying to find some food. Sadly, almost all of the chests contain building materials. You still put some stone and spruce wood into your inventory, saving them for later. 

“Wait, please don’t steal from my friends.” Ghostbur mutters quietly next to you, his hand phasing through your shoulder in an attempt to stop you. For a second, you almost falter not wanting to upset the ghost. 

“I’m not really stealing. I’m just borrowing?” You don’t sound too sure, the excuse is rather pathetic. But, he accepts it, nodding along. You shuffle through the chest, head stuffed into the object. “Do you know where they keep the food?” 

“It’s in the second chest on the left.” A deeper voice catches you off guard, the sudden sound makes you spin. Two other males stand near the doorway, appearing tense. They both hold swords in their hands, glaring at your form. “Get away from them, Ghostbur.” The blond speaks again, motioning for the spirit to move. He doesn’t, however, instead sticking closer to your side. 

“But I don’t want to. They’re a nice person, I can tell.” The ghost frowns, his sheep nearing closer to rub against his side for comfort. 

“That person is stealing our stuff.” The piglin hybrid snorts, his grip on the sword tightening. 

“Technically borrowing.” You intervene meekly. Two glares are sent your way, the action making you flinch. You apologize, gills flicking back. The movement catches the blond’s attention, his eyes widening slightly. 

“You’re an axolotl hybrid?” You look over at the man, deadpanning. Like it wasn’t completely obvious what your hybrid features were. Your response is miffed, snide. 

“Yeah, I guess so.”

The piglin hybrid snorts, turning to look at his companion with a false glare. “Phil, why does that matter?” He turns back to you, drawing his sword. “Look, get out of our house and we won’t kill you.” 

You stare them down, fingers twitching numbly. You can’t take shelter in the pond, that’ll give away your hiding spot. But, there’s no water sources nearby. Perhaps, you can wait them out. With slow movements, you cautiously brush past the pair. Your gaze doesn’t leave their weapons, prepared to draw your own in case they decide to strike. But, neither do. Instead they watch as you walk into the distance, figure disappearing in the brooks of the forest. 

Your scales are shaking with your shivers, as you crouch in the snow. Your tail slowly swishes side to side in the snow, pushing aside the material. You struggle to stay warm, teeth on the verge of chattering. Thankfully, Ghostbur followed you not long after he left. He brought along his sheep, the wool providing a small sense of warmth to your frigid body. You wait, until the lights in the houses go out and for the smoke to halt in the chimneys. Then, you rush towards the buildings. You’re quiet when you divide into the water, sighing as the warm waters embrace your form. Fish swarm around you, surprised to see you back so late. You simply ignore the flicking of their fins and questions, choosing to lay back against the coral for a nap. 

.

You munch weakly on some food, savoring the taste in your mouth. You couldn’t leave the pond too often, not with the others around. You didn’t want to risk getting caught anyways. It didn’t take long to start creating a house in the pond, by tunneling through a wall. The entrance wasn’t noticeable from the surface either, covered by blue and red coral fans. 

A rock lands in the pond, breaking the surface and sinking to the bottom. You watch it sink, before swimming up. For the past couple of weeks that has been your signal that Ghostbur was here to visit. He would try to visit often, but would forget easily. When he stopped by, the ghost would bring food and his pet. Your head breaks the surface, a wide smile on your face. But, the expression drops when you spot Philza at the edge of the waters. You’re about to duck back down but he shouts for you to stop. 

Cautiously, you watch the blonde approach, gaze landing on a wrapped package in his hands. He holds it out towards you, eyes kind. Carefully, you rise out of the water, taking the object. Unwrapping it reveals a loaf of fresh bread, the surface still steaming. You bite into the food, not waiting for his response. It’s quiet, just the sounds of you eating and nearby ambience. The man doesn’t say anything yet, watching your figure. You finish the bread off soon enough, feeling somewhat full. 

“Thank you.” You speak after a split second, whisker-like gills turning back in embarrassment. He doesn’t mock you or shout, like one would expect. Instead he offers a kind grin. 

“It’s no problem. Here, take these too.” He reaches through his inventory, pulling out a small cloth bag. He tosses it in your direction, letting you catch it before it hits the water. You twist it open, gasping when you spot the numerous seeds inside the pouch. You could create a farm with these! 

You shut the bag tightly, looking up quickly with shock stuck on your face. Philza can’t get another word out, your figure already disappearing under the water. The water splashes loudly as you dive, hurrying to place the seeds somewhere safe. 

Philza returns for the next couple of weeks, continuing to bring food with him. At first, you were silent, unsure of trusting this man. Sure, he’s been bringing you food but his friend did threaten to kill you. Maybe this was his way of luring you out. But, that thought fades away with time. The blond is actually quite nice, and you find yourself being good friends with Phil. Most days are spent chatting about his adventures or the places you’ve seen before. He sometimes visits with Ghostbur but never with Technoblade. 

You sigh contently, floating around the pond lazily. Philza recently brought some magma blocks, the material making the waters much water. He seats near the edge, his feet resting in the waters. He leans back against his palms, just as relaxed. You look over at him, upon seeing movement out of the corner of your eye. His cloak falls to his side, large black wings spreading out behind him. The scene has you in awe, the hybrid features surprising you. One wouldn’t know the man has wings underneath that heavy cape of his. You spin around, turning to get a better look at his wings. One of them doesn’t rise as high as the other, feathers noticeably weaker on that side. The limb is injured, weak from long ago. 

“Your wing is broken.” You swim closer, not stopping even when he peaks an eye open. 

“Yeah, that’s why I usually wear a cloak.” He closes his eyes again, wings tucking into his frame in an attempt to hide them. You leave the pool, even though the snow nips at your skin. 

“How did that happen?” You pause, sitting by his side. Not too close, but enough to see him inch away at the question. 

“It’s a long story.” That’s more than enough to know he doesn’t want to speak about the subject. You don’t push another question towards him, since that could make things worse. A breeze passes by, pushing hair back gently. It’s a break, one offered before you spout the next question: “Can I see your wings?” 

He turns to look at you, eyebrow lifting with confusion. “I suppose.” He mumbles somewhat uncomfortably, stretching his injured wing out once more. The details of the wound sticks out more up close, burns littering his skin. You reach out to touch his wing, fingers barely grazing the feathers before his wings tuck back in. 

“What are you doing?” He’s flustered, obviously. He looks at you, wide-eyed and unsure. A sincere smile meets his gaze. 

“Just trust me, please.” With those words, his wings stretch out again. He looks away, eyes closed to avoid your face. He doesn’t want to see the expression you could offer, ones he’s seen so often; disgust, fear, pity and more. But, that doesn’t happen. Your fingers trail over his wounded wing, being careful of any weak spots. 

With a deep breath, your hand begins to glow a faint color, the same shade as the scales on your dorsal fin. Slowly you reach out again, tracing across his wing. Feathers start to grow back slowly, the process steady. Burns disappear and scarred flesh fades to normal skin. You can feel the muscle tense under your palm, but Philza doesn’t move away. When done, you retreat your hand back. Small pants fall from your mouth, proof of your exhaustion and hard work. Axolotls have the gift of regeneration, being able to heal and grow back their own limbs. However, healing another is something you’ve only seen the elders back at home accomplish. Healing Phil took more energy than you expected. 

Said man tests his wing, shifting around the limb with ease. His mouth falls open, the older man speechless. His wing feels like new, maybe even stronger before the fall of L’manburg. He drags you into a tight hug suddenly, numerous words rushing from his mouth in gratitude. As much as you want to return the gesture, the feeling of nausea rising in your gut has you reeling. You go slack from the exhaustion, collapsing into his shoulder. Phil yells in shock but you miss the words he shouts, ears ringing. You can feel him lift you up from the ground, but nothing else. 

Philza rushes you inside, practically knocking down the door in a hurry. The commotion has Techno running over, the hybrid tensing up when he spots you in the older man’s arm. He wants to shout, even curse out Phil for bringing the stranger back, but the look in the avain’s eyes makes any protests die on his tongue. Instead he runs to the basement, pulling out any potions that could help. 

.

Waking up in an unknown location is no fun and neither when the spot gives you a crick in your back. Your eyes peel open, weakly looking around the room. You’re placed in a bathtub, the water running cold. Your tail overhangs the edge, the tub too small to hold you entirely. You sink against the edge, a soft sigh leaving your lungs. You’re still weak, limbs too tired to move. Not eating well enough and the stress of regeneration made you pass out, you knew that much. 

Techno enters the room, the door squealing when he opens it. You flinch at seeing the tall man and struggle to back away. Water splashes frantically with your movements, spilling out of the tub. 

“Stop struggling, I’m not going to hurt you.” He speaks monotonously, still standing in the doorway. He doesn’t approach even after you stop moving. 

“Where’s Philza?” You murmur warily, keeping your eyes on the taller man. You don’t trust him and he doesn’t trust you. If Phil was here, maybe you’d feel a little better about this situation. Technoblade rolls his eyes, crossing his arms stiffly. 

“He left to get potion ingredients since you used up half our stock.” You turn away at his harsh tone, feeling slightly ashamed. He seems to notice that and sighs. Techno leaves for a moment then returns with some food. It’s nothing generous, rather a chunk of bread and a steamed potato. But, with how hungry you are, you gladly take it. 

“Thank you.” Your words are quiet, almost undetected by Techno. But, the flick of his ear proves that he heard you. He simply nods, not saying anything. Then, he leaves. You end up staying in, what turns out to be, Techno’s house for a few more days. You’ve tried to reason with the pair that you’re fine going back to the pond but neither accept the excuse. Philza tosses glares in your direction along with some soft scolding while Techno merely brushes them off. At first, your encounters with the piglin hybrid were awkward. Often he would just stop by with food or bandages, per Phil’s request. He seems to warm up a bit only really because of the forced proximity and of course, because you helped his friend. 

In no time, you end up back in your pond. The two invite you over for meals sometimes, well mainly Philza invites you over. It doesn’t take long for you to meet Ranboo, the mix hybrid proving to be a sweet friend too. While he doesn’t seem as enthusiastic about water as you are, he still is kind enough to listen to you ramble. Sometimes the teen brings around items from around the area for you to decorate your house with, it’s a nice occurrence. 

. 

“Do you need something?” You’re floating casually in the pond, staring up at Techno. He rarely approaches you, still apprehensive. You don’t blame him though, Phil and Ranboo have explained how he has trust issues with almost everyone. The older man grunts, clearly not happy with the predicament. A stray hand reaches up to scratch at the back of his neck awkwardly. 

“I’m going to an ocean monument for prismarine crystals.” 

“Okay, and…?” 

“Philza doesn’t like going in water because of his wings. And, I need someone to watch my back while I fight guardians or mine.” He looks annoyed by the situation, still facing away. His ears flick back at your giggles. 

“I’ll get some supplies just give me a minute.” You duck under the water, returning to your house momentarily. It takes seconds to grab some light armor and weapons. When you break the surface, Techno is still in the same spot looking just as bored as before. He does seem glad that you didn’t take too long, turning around and walking towards the portal. 

The journey to the monument doesn’t take nearly as long as you would have expected. It was a little uncomfortable traveling through the Nether to reach the ocean, but you brought enough water bottles for the trip. You practically dive into the water when you see it, the action making your companion chuckle quietly. 

You swim around happily, not having been in such a large body of water in so long. The water splashes loudly as you swim around with ease. You chirp lightly when you spot other axolotls in the waters, diving in their direction. The adults chirp back while the younger axolotls playfully swim around you. Techno ignores your distracted state, choosing to let you continue having fun as he nears the monument. He’s already chugged a few water breathing potions and his enchanted armor will help him survive the ocean. 

He starts at the top of the structure, already mining away at the exposed sea lanterns. Occasionally, he glances over in your direction to make sure you are staying safe. So lost in the process he doesn’t notice the guardians swimming nearby. It isn’t until he hears their screech that he finally spins around, narrowly avoiding one of their lasers. He draws his sword, slicing through two of the creatures before they can attack again. The third one though, has had enough time to charge its attack, eye aimed on Technoblade. The hybrid braces himself for the impact, knowing he can’t move fast enough. 

In seconds, the guardian goes from offense to defense. It squeaks loudly as you slam into its side and causes them to lose its focus. Your tail swishes angrily behind you, prepared to attack again. The guardian returns your glare, eye narrowing. It squeaks again before fleeing. With excitement rivaling that of a dog, you spin around to see Techno. Your grin is wide, cheeks full of pride. 

“Did you see that? The guardian was like woosh, and I went pow and now they’re gone!” You move your hands around dramatically while talking, emphasizing the sound effects as needed. You pause for a second, eyesight training behind Techno. He looks over his shoulder to spot another guardian, however this one isn’t preparing to attack. Instead, it lets out a pathetic squeal and tries to swim away while you dart after it with a group of axolotls. With an exasperated sigh, Techno goes back to collecting crystals. 

When done, he shouts for you. It takes a couple minutes for you to exit the ocean monument, apparently having gone out of your way to hunt other guardians. The smile on your face is priceless and has him faltering for a second, he doesn’t see you this happy often. The trip back isn’t quiet for once, Techno actually engaging slightly in conversation. The snow greets you both warmly, although it certainly isn’t pleasant for you. Feeling dehydrated, mainly from The Nether, you begin to ruffle through your pockets for a water bottle. 

A hand moves in front of your face, holding out a potion bottle of water. You look back at the owner, shock settling into your features. Technoblade doesn’t say anything, pushing the drink to you in motion to take it. With the slowness of a stray, you grasp onto the bottle. You sip at the water, feeling your gills perk up. 

“Thank you.” 

“It’s no problem.” He keeps walking, facing ahead. You catch up with his long strides with some difficulty, almost brushing against his shoulder. 

“So, you carry water for me?” Your tone is teasing, tail flicking with playfulness. He snorts, cheeks flushing lightly from embarrassment. 

“Don’t overthink it. I’d never hear the end of it if you died on my watch.” 

“Oh, sure.” You draw out the word, obviously not believing his words. He grumbles, walking away faster. With a laugh, you trail behind him, knowing that he isn’t actually angry. You follow him into the house, not just yet retreating to your home. Philza waves from the kitchen, the man already having started on dinner. You smile fondly, remembering how surprised the hybrid was when he found out you lived in the pond. But, he took it as a compliment, considering he made the space. 

You flop down on the couch, limbs sprawling out as you get comfortable. Techno eventually joins you on the other side, after removing his armor and cape. It’s a peaceful silence, almost nice enough to fall asleep in. Technoblade is reading a potions book, flicking the pages over every couple of minutes. He sniffs, a hand raising to move some hair out of his face. But, the strand falls again leading him to tuck it behind his ear a few more times, agitation increasing. 

With a groan, you scoot over to his side of the couch. You face his side, sitting with your legs crossed. He lifts an eyebrow, as a silent question, urging you to speak. 

“Turn around.” 

“Why?” 

“I want to braid your hair. It’ll stop falling in your face.” You lean forward in excitement, practically bouncing in your seat. He sighs loudly but agrees, shifting so his back is to you. You run your hands through his hair briefly, amazed by how soft it is. Once done admiring, you split his hair into three sections and start braiding it. It’s a simple braid, although a little messy, but gets the job done. When finished, you scoot back to look over his hair. He turns back around, a finger lifting to run alongside a small braid near the crown of his head. Techno turns to look at you, mumbling a thank you. 

You fall back clumsy, sprawling out on the couch again. Your feet land in his lap, but Techno doesn’t say anything about it. Instead, he goes back to reading. 

“Are you guys ready for dinner?” Philza calls out from the kitchen, and eventually walks into the living room after not getting a response. He blinks owlishly upon spotting Techno with braided hair and you lying out lazily. “Uh, guys?” He pauses, a knowing smirk forming. “The salmon is ready.” 

The food, a favorite of axolotls, has you springing forward with brilliant energy. You stumble over your feet, rushing to the kitchen. The two chuckle and follow you. The sight of your tail wagging quickly and piling up a plate sends them into a laughing fit. They’re certainly glad to have you around. You’ve made life more interesting and brighten their days with the simplest of actions. Not waiting another second, the pair join their friend at the table for a night full of joy and lively conversation. 

I have this thing where I see the brattiest, most condescending character of a series and immediately wants to see them fucked within an inch of their life. Just fuck the attitude out of them, piece of cake. Bonus points if its enemies to lovers for the rough sex and "Oh fuck no, why you?" moment.

getting a noise complaint about being too loud during sex

ʚ incl: gojo, geto, nanami, toji, choso, sukuna, higuruma, shiu, ino, shoko, uraume

ʚ cont: suggestiveness, fluff, crack

ʚ note: small grammar mistakes but i’m too lazy to fix them lol

MINORS AND AGELESS BLOGS DNI

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ

x : LUNCH BREAK :*+ﾟ

in which: you don't visit wriothesley during his lunch break after last night's argument, so he goes to the court of fontaine just to see you.

warnings: approx. 1.9k words, PURE FLUFF, gn!reader x pathetic and soppy and lovesick wriothesley, canon setting, reader works at the court of fontaine, post-argument so very minimal angst, probs not in character LOL

a/n: there's not a lot of content regarding fontaine or wriothesley rn so i apologise if this isn't completely in character. what i do not apologise for, however, is the urge to make him as lovesick as possible.

There is a notable tension in the Fortress of Meropide, and although a prison isn’t a place for rainbows and sunshine, today it feels especially devastating. It seems that the lord of the prison is the one responsible for it.

Brooding at his desk, Wriothesley glances occasionally at the clock on his desk, growing more and more impatient with each document he has to read through. He is waiting for something: a knock on his door. He is waiting for the call of his name, the reason for their interruption, then your name will reach his ears and an unmatched excitement will bloom in his chest. Then you’ll slip through the doors with lunch for two, he’ll pull out a chair for you right beside him, and mask professionalism that betrays the eagerness your presence always brings out. 

Your absence must be because of the argument that happened last night. One that remained unresolved because he went to bed before you, too furious to try to talk it out. Yet, when Wriothesley woke in the morning, a wave of guilt washed over him when you weren’t pressed against him like usual. Instead, you were on the other side of the mattress, further than an arm’s length away whilst turned away from him and Fontaine’s chilly mornings had never felt colder.

If he didn’t need to go to work much earlier than you, he would have waited until you had woken up to leave, but being the lord of the Fortress of Meropide meant that his presence was demanded. So, with a lingering kiss to your cheek and then your temple, he leaves into the dewy mornings of Fontaine, looking forward to his lunch break that the two of you often share together.

Except now, lunch is almost over and there hasn’t been a knock on his door. No one has called his name- not people he cared about, at least. You haven’t slipped through the heavy set of doors. You haven’t come down from the Court of Fontaine to visit him, and Wriothesley’s patience is thinning.

His fingers itch with the need to hold you, to tuck you close to his chest and just keep you there for a few moments as time pass by. Especially after last night, Wriothesley needs you now more than ever. 

By the time there’s only one hour left in the work day, he snaps. Stands up from his seat with an unmatched sense of fervour because of the unnervingly quiet day and snatches his coat from the hanger, leaving documents unread as he makes a beeline for the exit of the prison. The guards listen attentively to Wriothesley’s final commands for the day in his absence and once the information is cemented, the dark-haired is off without another second wasted.

You, on the other hand, sit in your office drowned in piles upon piles of papers. Wriothesley is a passing thought every now and then, the memories of last night’s harsh argument settling like weights in your stomach. You miss Wriothesley, very dearly, and all you want is to settle things with him. However, the image of his furious eyes and clenched jaw terrifies you beyond belief, you’re not even sure if he’ll be calmer by the time you get home, so for the first time ever, you dread the idea of going home. 

What you are completely unaware of, however, is your lover that is storming your way, desperate to receive the medicine that will cure his moodiness and irritation. 

The knock on your door distracts you from the piles of papers on your desk. 

“Who is it?” you call out, voice reverberating around the spaciousness of your office.

“It’s Wriothesley, can I come in?” His tone is sharp and leaves no room for you to reject him, but the mere sound of his voice causes you to stiffen, grip on your pen tightening as the papers before you lay forgotten. 

What is Wriothesley doing here? He normally never comes up to the Court of Fontaine just to see you because leaving the prison would be far too neglectful. There was also half an hour before he was done for the day, so could there be official business that needs to be discussed? Something urgent, perhaps? 

If it was urgent, then why come to you and not Monsieur Neuvillette- or even Lady Furina?

“Yeah- yes, you can come in,” you mutter.

When the door clicks open, Wriothesley practically barges through, door shutting behind him as he marches towards you. Getting up from your chair, you’re frightened with anticipation due to  how intense his stance is. 

“Is something the matter?” You begin, panic seeping into your voice as he pauses before you, determination setting his eyes ablaze as he eyes you down like prey. “Wriothesley, you’re scaring me, did something happen at the prison-”

“Where were you at lunch?” He demands.

You blink. “Excuse me?”

“Why didn’t you come visit?” 

“Is… is why you came up here? To ask why I didn’t visit you during lunch?”

He nods, expression stern as usual save for a small pout.

“I was swamped with work,” you half-lie, gesturing to the desk behind you and although there is clear evidence on your table through the form of stacked folders and paper, a storm of uncertainty brews in his blue eyes. “I couldn’t visit if I wanted to get these done, I apologise.”

The dark-haired frowns. “Is that it?”

“Yes. That’s all.” His eyebrows furrow, creating crease marks in his forehead that you want to kiss away, alleviating his worries, but you hold yourself back from doing so in fear that Wriothesley does not want you touching him. 

However, a switch is flicked when Wriothesley’s stern expression softens, melting into one resembling a kicked dog. “So you’re not upset with me?” 

“Oh, is that also on your mind?”

“Of course, I don’t like it when you’re upset with me,” your lover mutters, looking away bashfully to conceal the reddening of his cheeks. “You aren’t though, right?”

“No, not upset. Scared, maybe, but definitely not upset.” 

His eyes are glossy when he looks back at you. “Scared, why are you scared?” 

“W-we didn’t end on a good note last night,” you rub your wrist nervously. “I didn’t know if you would be happy with seeing me. On top of that, you can be really intimidating sometimes, so admittedly, I was a little scared to come see you just in case that you did not want me there.”

Wriothesley visually deflates with your last statement, shoulders dropping and eyes glistening as he murmurs a small, pathetic, “is that so?”

He wonders what part about him ever made it seem like he never wants you beside him, and the thought that he had frightened you enough to prevent you visiting him is an upsetting one. You must see it in his eyes with the way you frantically begin to explain yourself. 

“Oh no, darling, I didn’t mean it like that-”

He turns his head away again, disappointed in himself. It’s one thing for his prisoners to consider him intimidating but it’s another for you, his own lover, to think so as well, and the thought that he had scared you creates insurmountable shame to swell within him. Yet, his whirlwind of anxieties ceases when your hand goes to cup his cheek, gently prompting him to look at you. Then, a kiss is pressed to the corner of his lips, and his heart skips a beat at the sensation, love blocking his airways when you pull away to smile up at him. 

“As scary as you might be, oh great lord of the Fortress of Meropide, I also know you will never hurt me,” you reassure. “Rather, I feel safest when I’m around you, please never doubt that.”

Wriothesley sighs, hand snaking up to grip your waist and pull you closer to him. “Thank you, my love. But I beg, even if you assume I am upset with you, please keep visiting my office during lunch, it is the part of the day I look forward to most.”

“If that is your request then maybe you just need to be good and listen to me instead of arguing until your head pops off,” you tease, patting his face twice and he huffs before muttering an ‘understood’. Anything to see you. “Is there something else you need from my office?”

“No, just wanted to see you,” he looks at the brown paper bag in his hands. “I brought you lunch, just in case you didn’t eat.” 

“Wriothesley,” you melt, “how thoughtful of you. I’ll make sure to eat it when I finish reading those contracts.”

“You should eat now, though. Don’t drown yourself in work, it’s not healthy.”

“I wish it were that easy, but these piles were dumped on my desk this morning and were assigned to be done by the end of the week.”

The hand that was on your waist comes up to gently hover over your cheek and Wriothesley studies you, icy eyes hardening due to the fatigue present in your expression. You grab his wrist, trying to diverge his attention, but you should know better than assuming that your wellbeing isn’t of utmost importance to him. “Unacceptable, I should have a word with your supervisor-”

“-no, no, Wriothesley! I insist, this is manageable.”

He frowns, deep and serious before surrendering to your pleas. “Fine, but if it doesn’t get better by the end of the week, then I will be interfering.”

“If you do so, my supervisor will be too scared to come in for a month,” you squeeze his wrist and gently guide it away from your face, ignorant to how your neglect for your own health hurts Wriothesley as well. He knows you love your job, but he still thinks that you deserve to live life carefree, that you should get everything you want without ever lifting a finger. “It’s alright, dear, you mustn’t worry about me when your work is a thousand times more stressful.”

“Impossible.” He worries about you every second of the day. Telling Wriothesley to stop fretting over you would be like telling him to stop breathing. “Now eat.” 

You yelp when he pulls you towards your chair, sitting you down. From the paper bag, he takes out a sandwich, one that you recognise is from one of fontaine’s favourite cafés, and he carefully unwraps it before raising it to your mouth.

“Wriothesley… this is a little embarrassing,” you whisper, wrapping your arms around yourself.

He doesn’t say anything, just persistently stares at you, gaze intense enough for you to give in. As you lean in to take the first bite, you are bashfully looking away from your lover, who wears a pleased expression, satisfied with the fact that you’re letting him take care of you. 

The tension from last night’s dispute hasn’t completely melted away, there are still things that need to be discussed calmly, but as you keep trying to push his hand away and battle Wriothesley’s indestructible stubbornness, he knows it will work out in the end. You love him and he loves you, and if you ever forget to visit him during lunch break again, then he’ll have to tear himself away from the prison and come up, just to meet you.

© EARTHTOOZ 2023, do not steal, translate, repost my fics and do not recommend my fics onto any other site.

New York City ballet production of Midsummer Nights Dream

don't destroy his self-esteem 🐦😆

Thank god for Russian dash cams to bring us wonders like this

HOT MILF NEXT DOOR

( request ) 𖥔  ──── Satoru, Suguru, Choso x f!milf reader, mdni. age gap ( all characters are 25-29 and reader around 44-46 ) mentions of drinking , creampie , boobjob and blowjob ( choso ) , titty sucking , breeding kink , cheating on your husband w suguru plot twist he deserves it , cheating with subby choso too and he has mommy issues

SATORU !

what a cute gentleman your next door neighbor was, with that charming smile, bright blue eyes and fluffy white hair. he was such an adorable kid, always helping when you brought in your groceries or even offering to check your car for you.

you always thought he was interested in your daughter, being around the same age it was a good match in your head, although you were not going to act like a matchmaker, certain that Satoru’s charm was enough.

little did you know, Satoru was waiting for your daughter to leave so he could pounce on you, watching the girl walk down the apartment stairs with a fit that only showed she was out clubbing, and hopefully stay the whole night away.

long fingers wrap around the neck of a wine bottle, a smirk on his lips and free hand knocking on your door. the mere sight of your confused face and wearing a simple sleeping shirt was enough to make his cock throb. “i met your daughter on her way out, and thought you might want some company” a little white lie.

the company was welcome, he knew you haven’t gotten laid in a while, not that he has been observing your daily routine, of course not, but you were so tending to your home, so responsible towards your daughter that you were coming back from work at the same time every single day.

the glasses of wine come and go like water, between gentle laughs and chatter that Satoru guides until you’re a bit more giggly and loose, not drunk yet, he’s not going to fuck you without consent.

but what comes out of you is a slight sigh, “how I wish I met someone like you when I was younger” again, another throb in his cock.

clearing his throat, Satoru leans closer, just slightly letting his fingers brush on your thigh, “why is that... honey?” he tries, gauging your reaction.

“hm, my relationship with my ex was never good, I had a daughter too young and we forced each other to compromise, I think I never experienced real love”

fuck, why are you making his cock ache so hard? he’s never been this hard in his entire life, not calming down even at the sight of your unconfused eyes and slightly sad tone.

“you’re so young, so beautiful, darling” Satoru tries again, cupping your chin at your willingness, “any man would be lucky to have... such a sexy woman as you, myself included” voice low and husky, stopping himself from drifting his eyes down to where your plump tits squeeze against his elbow.

how much love were you lacking? to so easily fall onto the white haired’s arms, your neediness makes his heart clench and cock splurt another wave of precum into your soaked cunt, spread under him in the same couch you were previously chatting.

it’s just too damn hard to hide how much you affect him, gripping onto your soft thigh, eyes closed and rutting into your pussy like it’s the first time he has sex, going absolutely mad at the sight of your folds stretching to accommodate his girth and how your whimpers of pleasure just grew with each deliciously lewd compliment to your soft body, “your pussy is heaven, darling, i’m getting addicted to you, I need to be inside you forever” he grunts, hips snapping like desperate, wishing to carve his shape into your walls.

“you’re so gorgeous” he palms your wide hips, the scar of your c-section driving him nuts, “so sexy”

and you cream so prettily, with a thumb on your clit and his cockhead stirring your juices overflowing from your stretched hole, you can’t help but continue to moan and stare at him in wonder, fuck, you’re making Satoru fall damn hard.

“Satoru... baby, so close...”

his hips stutter at the petname, another wave of precum into your cunt, with eyes closed tightly so he doesn’t embarrass himself by stuffing you with his load so soon, no, you’ll cum first, by being such a sexy woman.

the hand that wasn’t gripping your thigh goes to your tit, squeezing the flesh with almost black, feral eyes, grunting at the new angle that forces your eyes to cross, gushing your sweet release around his pulsing cock.

“oh, yeah, sweetheart, that’s such a good fucking girl, let me fill you, i’m going to fill, oh, fuck, i’m cumming in your fucking pussy”

and by your reaction, it’s been a while, so Satoru’s new goal is to give you as many creampies as you want, keep you nice and full forever.

SUGURU !

how’s the saying... boys will always be boys? “she’s so fucking sexy, Satoru” Suguru grunts, laying back on his couch while lazily palming his crotch at the memory of you bending over to fetch the groceries from your car’s backseat.

“isn’t she married or something?” the white haired laughs, voice slightly cut by Suguru standing up and peeking through the window and downstairs where your not so likeable husband arrived from work.

“i couldn’t care less” he hangs up, staring down at the other men with narrowed eyes, he hated that guy.

“good morning” doll, Suguru finishes in his brain, giving you one of those half smirked smiles of his, a slight movement of his head to push the hairs away from his eyes, eyeing you up and down bluntly, “heading somewhere?”

why did that look make you fluster inside?

“my son has a camping trip, i’m dropping him off” you smile him back.

his eyes scan the bags at your feet, a tent, a sleeping bag and a large backpack, Saturday and your shitty husband wasn’t home, “looks like you need some help” without waiting for a response, Suguru slings the bags over his shoulders and walk downstairs, hearing you get your son ready and follow him back.

“where is your car?”

“um, my husband took it, I was about to call a cab” luckily Suguru’s back is facing you, or else you would have seen the absolute anger look in his gaze.

“i’ll drop you off” and again, without waiting for a reply, he makes his way to his own car, jaw tense and eye twitching.

the drive is nice, you never expected for your slightly isolated neighbor to be so good with kids, his eyes gentle and words soft. same treatment you receive even after dropping off your kid, “would you like to grab some lunch with me?” and you can’t refuse.

without realizing you spend the afternoon with Suguru, grabbing lunch, going grocery shopping together and even deciding to grab a drink late at night, your husband was not going to wait for you at home either way.

that one restaurant was nice, and the parking lot was quite large, lucky, that way no one could see the fogging windows and slight movement of Suguru’s car with every bounce of your pretty body atop his pulsing cock, this was wrong, so damn wrong but why did it feel so good? “g-ah, Suguru... haah, shit...!” have you always been this vocal? you don’t believe so, or else the black haired could have heard you at least once through the wall.

his eyes are half lidded, a smirk on his face at the lewd sight of your tits jiggling with every bounce, with every time you impale down on his veiny cock, so pretty and desperate for a good orgasm. “good girl” he chuckles, adoring the way your pussy walls quivered at the praise, “you haven’t been fucked good in so long, haven’t you?” he coos.

your head shakes in a squeaky cry, angling your hips just right to hammer into your g-spot until your eyes crossed and drool seeps past your lips, glistening your chest, “that’s a pity” his words are slightly mocking, but not to you, mentally wishing you husband could see how dumb you look on his cock, “sexy bodies like yours deserve to be filled every day” lazily reaching to cup your tits, licking your saliva and trailing to suck a nipple into his mouth, “you make cute kids, you should make more, can I make you a baby?”

a smirk covers his mouth at your immediate agreement, “fuck, yes, Suguru, get me pregnant, get me pregnant” you repeat dumbly, losing all coherence at the drag of that engorged tip dragging across your walls and soft lips wrapped around your sensitive nipples.

“i’ll give you as many as you want, I can’t wait to see these all plump and full of milk”

CHOSO !

Yuuji’s teacher is pretty damn hot.

Choso has eyes, and eyes are too see is what he says to himself when he finds himself staring at you for too long when he picks up Yuuji from school.

your husband is there... sadly, all affectionate and smiley, giving you a kiss while you both climb in a car. it looks like you have a healthy and happy marriage, something the black haired wished, with you.

pumping his cock at night at the memory of you, at the kind smiles you give him whenever your eyes meet, or that one time he introduced himself as Yuuji’s older brother, your hand was so soft around his, Choso wonders how it would feel around his cock.

parents meetings weren’t an issue for Choso, that until you became his little brother’s teacher, then his palms began to sweat at the fact of being in the same room with you, alone, nothing but the sound of your breathing, your scent and the loud thumping of his chest.

“Choso, are you okay?” you offer him one of those smiles where Choso feels like fainting, “you’re a bit red” and sweating, but you weren’t going to say that.

“fine, i’m fine” he hurries, yet your smile doesn’t falter, a hint of something behind your eyes.

“i see, perhaps it is something related to Yuuji, isn’t it? that’s alright, we can talk about it later, right now I have to meet the next parents” huh, weird... but alright.

it’s already dark when Choso walks into your office again, slightly less nervous than before, “so what is the issue?”

there really is no issue, at least none he can tell you about, “everything is alright, Yuuji’s been doing good so far” he shrugs, brushing off his nervousness.

yet you stand and he stiffens, taking a few steps closer to him, “so the issue is not Yuuji... is it me?” you grin, a slight tilt of your head, “i can see the way you look at me, Choso” your steps are light on the carpet, every second closer to where he sits before you drop to your knees and he gasps.

“i don’t...” he starts, but is quickly cut by your hands on his thighs, fuck, don’t get hard, don’t get hard, don’t....

“you’re hard” shit.

“i’m sorry, I really can’t help it, you’re so... beautiful”

you hum a little laugh and his eyes are about to roll back.

“no need to apologize” have you always sounded so sensual?, “but this is my fault so... let me help” you murmur, waiting for any sign of refusal from Choso, who just leans back, panting and gasping with his eyes locked on you.

life is unfair, tossing the biggest tests at Choso, which currently is holding back a fat load of cum from staining your face solely by seeing your plump tits, your pretty flowy dress around your waist and breasts squishing his cock, the tip lewdly peaking from the top and smearing precum all over your collarbones, “feels good?” good is an understatement, he feels in heaven, holding the urge to snap his hips and fuck your tits nice and good.

“y-yeah...” is all he whimpers, toes curling in his shoes and waterline aching from the need to release a few pleasure tears.

“your cock is so pretty”

ah, fuck... his cock twitches, “don’t... u-ugh, say that...”

you hum amused, deciding not to tease the man and sticking your tongue out, moving your breasts more eagerly up and down his cock, tongue poking to lick the drooling tip, “a-ah, shit! i’m going to cum!” he warns and you don’t care, slowing down your movements until his trembling subsidies, with a low chuckle at the protesting whine and groan.

tears finally released from his eyes, “please...” what a good boy, begging for you to milk his cock.

you start again, tongue wrapped around the tip and the underside of your tits smacking on his damp pelvis, “you love this, don’t you? you needed someone to milk your pretty cock, was jerking off to the thought of me not enough?” how did you even... was his face that obvious.

“i need you so bad mo— hngh....”

“cum for me, pretty boy” cumming on your tits and face was a wonderful idea, balls clenching and veins throbbing while the sticky semen lands on your stretched tongue.

his glossy and unfocused eyes land next to the chalkboard, a picture of you and your students hanging in there, you’re so good with kids... and Yuuji would love a nephew or niece.