Shrinking Women - Lily Myers

Your opinions on polygamy?

Hmm..I have to say that I am not so much a fan of polygamy. 

By way of explanation, I would have to say that it’s because I’m a big believer in the idea of “One Love”. That is to say, I’m not going to have sex until I’m married, and ideally, I plan to be married “until death do us part”. So I personally am not open to the idea of divorce except in the case of abuse or infidelity or some other such extreme circumstances. “Irreconcilable differences”, to me, is not an option. So that being said, my vision for my life is being in love with, being married to, and having sex with, only one person. I want to be so close to someone that I know them inside and out. I want to know all their strengths and all their weaknesses and love them for both equally, because that’s what makes them who they are. I want to be totally open and vulnerable about myself with someone and have them accept me for who I am. I want to have the irrefutable confidence that I want to spend every day until the end of my days with this person. I want to whether the storms of life with this person. I want to fight like crazy with this person. I want a life-partner. Like me and him against the world, you know? And to me, such an intimate experience with only one person makes it all the more valuable and precious. Especially with the sex thing, especially for me. 

But that’s just the romantic in me. Let’s talk about what the bible has to say on the topic of polygamy. 

In the bible, there are many examples of man who had more than one wife. Sure, King Soloman had 700 wives and 300 concubines on top of that! (1 Kings 11:2-3) [Sidenote: what the heck are you gonna do with that many women? I mean even if you slept with a different woman every day, it would take you more almost three years to get through them all! I bet he didn’t know most of their names.] That being said, most theological scholars seem to think that the polygamy was a cultural thing and only tolerated, if not condoned by God.

In Genesis, after God takes one of Adam’s ribs to make Eve, it says “This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.” (Genesis 2:24) That seems pretty clear. It even says that two become one, so that seems to support the monogamy argument. 

Later on in the New Testament, Paul (who was a pretty funny guy) is talking about how he’s a bachelor because it allows him to focus more on his evangelical mission, but that it’s better to get married than to “burn in lust”. Because, for some reason, the members of the early church in Corinth seemed to think that sex is bad. This is completely false! Sex was created by God and it is a beautiful thing. So Paul is basically saying that sex is not a bad thing, but you shouldn’t really be sleeping around, because that’s not the way God intended it. Paul’s point is that trying to avoid sex completely is almost impossible, painful, frustrating for everyone involved, and a really good way to disappoint yourself. So marriage is the ideal situation here. Paul says, “But because of the temptation of sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband.” (1 Corinthians 7:2) [Sidenote: The verse after that talks about how husband and wife should fulfill each other’s sexual needs. Well-known pastor and author Rick Warren tweeted that verse, which I think has got to be the most awkward scripture tweet ever. Its awkwardness is surpassed only by Christian comedian Tim Hawkins who mistakenly told someone that his favourite verse is Psalm 38:7, which says “I have a painful disease in my loins”.] 

So anyway, it would seem that the bible supports the idea of monogamy. I personally think that the way God designed sex was for one man and one woman within the bonds of God-consecrated, holy matrimony. (This is a discussion on polygamy. I’ve already talked about homosexuality at length here, here and here.) Therefore, my seemingly romantic “One Love” idea is actually firmly grounded in my religious beliefs. 

In conclusion: Polygamy is not a lifestyle that I would choose, based on my beliefs and personal moral code, but like anything else, I will not condemn another person for choosing that lifestyle. These are the choices I’ve made for my life and will not be arrogant enough to try to extend them into yours. 

Thanks for the question :) Love chatting with you guys! Peace and love! -Katherine 

Ayo! 

today i met a christian guy who tries to follow the rules of the bible really well and i asked him if he is against gays because of Leviticus 20:13 and he told me no, he doesn’t because of Matthew 7

and he added that he would never judge anybody on their believes or way of living because only god can judge the people

this guy man

reblogging from myself because this is how strongly I feel about it 

ALRIGHT EVERYBODY LISTEN UP

I AM A CHRISTIAN.

I BELIEVE IN HEAVEN AND HELL.

KNOW WHAT I DON’T BELIEVE?

THAT PEOPLE GO TO HELL FOR BEING GAY.

KNOW WHY?

CAUSE THAT’S NOT WHAT THE BIBLE SAYS.

KNOW WHAT THE BIBLE SAYS?

THAT EVERYBODY WOULD GO TO HELL IF NOT FOR THE GRACE OF GOD THROUGH JESUS CHRIST WHO DIED ON THE CROSS.

THE BIBLE ALSO SAYS THAT IF YOU CONFESS WITH YOUR MOUTH THAT JESUS IS LORD AND BELIEVE IN YOUR HEART THAT GOD RAISED HIM FROM THE DEAD, YOU’LL BE SAVED (ROMANS 10 FREAKING 9 MOTHER-TRUCKER)

THEREFORE!!!

PEOPLE GO TO HELL IF THEY DON’T KNOW THE LOVE OF JESUS.

YOU KNOW WHO’S NEVER GONNA KNOW THE LOVE OF JESUS IF THE CHURCH KEEPS BEING RIGID JUDGEMENTAL CONDESCENDING NOT-NICE PEOPLE!?!?!

YOU GUESSED IT!

GAY PEOPLE 

CHURCH, BY OSTRACIZING GAY PEOPLE YOU ARE LITERALLY LIVING THE ANTITHESIS OF YOUR MANDATE.

Jesus is Loving Barrabas Interlude

I'm Turning 20 In 10 Days

"I've come so far but I've got so far to go." 20 strikes me as a very odd age indeed. You're two decades old. You're no longer a teenager. You have a different digit at the beginning of your age. I mean, you've had the same first digit since you were 10 years old. And we can all agree that 10 is a very young age. It's a big deal. You're entering into the decade of your life where so many things are supposed to happen. Between the ages of 20 and 30, you might finish post secondary education, start a career, fall in love, move out, get married and have kids. All of those things might happen while the number 2 is the first debit of your age. And I'm not gonna lie, that freaks me out. Adding to my disquiet is the fact that one of my friends is 20 and got engaged just the other day. I'm thrilled for her and panicked for me, and it's implications regarding the stage of life I am entering. Might I add that it did not help when my father said "that's how old I was when I got engaged." It does not worry me that I am single and will not be engaged at the age of 20. What worries me is that I might be expected to be engaged at the age of 20. There's only one day's difference between being a teenager and being an adult. Teenagers have a reputation for doing dumb stuff. But adults are expected to make informed, logical decisions in life changing situations. I know that 24 hours is not going to make that big a difference in my decision-making skills. 20 is a grown up age. But it will not belong to a grown up life. I still live at home. I still ask my parents' permission. I still eat Nutella with a spoon. I still have stuffed animals. I still hate homework. I still have sleepovers. I still get stupid little crushes. For all intents and purposes, I am a child! And yet I feel as though at the age of 20 I'm supposed to undergo some transformation and move out and have a career and find a mate. And then you begin contemplating the future. Do you know what it feels like when all the moments yet to come have weight and they press down on you? When all the breaths yet to be breathed turn to lead in your lungs? When you're suffocating under the expectations of others and your own expectations for yourself? The future is heavy with paths to be chosen, mistakes to be made, hearts to be broken, prices to be paid. Like a stormcloud with rain, it's full of successes and failures, joy and sorrow, triumphs and disappointments. And you begin to wonder, how on earth am I to weather these storms of life without an umbrella? I'm not entirely gloomy about this birthday. I know the future has limitless potential for optimism and that life is what you make it and I'm very excited to become an adult! I can't wait to move out and try new things and explore brave new worlds. That being said, I'm also straight up terrified. And with that thought, I bid you goodnight.

Can God call me to be an exotic dancer?

Dancing is an absolutely beautiful art form which can totally be used for ministry. HOWEVER imma go ahead and assume that when you say "exotic dancer" you mean it as a euphemism for "stripper". I wanna be all saucy and brush you off but...Here's the thing.God is so not into disrespecting yourself and your body. You do realize that He made you right? That He "knit you together in your mother's womb" (Psalm 139:13). He twisted together chains of deoxyribose nucleic acid with his bare fingers. He personally designed every physical trait you have. Your body is His masterpiece. And He is so not down with you using your body to incite lust. He is so not down with random men undressing you with their eyes because you're so much more than that! You're beautiful and perfect and made in the image of God! So....haha no. I don't think God's gonna call you to be an exotic dancer. I know you were just being a sauce-pan but it's not a topic I take lightly. So I am taking this opportunity to remind you, and everyone, to love and respect yourself and your body. And on a sidenote, I do not appreciate your attempts to twist my words and trap me into saying something I'll regret. That is very pharisee-esque of you. As in when the pharisees were trying to get dirt on Jesus so they could arrest him. And boy did they get BURNED! Food for thought. (Don't make me turn off the anon option!) Peace and love!-Katherine 

Many christian families seem to almost block or discourage their children from reading certain books, watching certain movies, or just taking out tv and computers all together. Do you think this is because these parents believe that if their children are exposed to these influences, the children will form their own opinions and leave the family?

I sincerely hope not! Haha your question makes me wonder about your opinion of Christian families. :P

I personally think that the primary objective of any parent, whether Christian or not, is to protect their children. And any parent anywhere, at any time, of any religious affiliation, who forbids their child to read or watch something, is doing so because they think that the entertainment in question is somehow inappropriate for their child. This might include gratuitous sexual references, excessive violence, coarse language, or questionable thematic messages. There was lots of stuff I wasn’t allowed to read or watch a a child, because it contained one or several of the content “red flags” I just listed. The real reason parents put boundaries on their children’s intellectual diet is because children’s brains are very malleable, and they form world views based on what they see. And they will quickly become desensitized to anything they see or hear frequently in various media, and they will then assimilate it into their way of thinking and it’ll come out in their actions and speech. If you let a kid play super violet video games when they’re like, 6, they will be more likely to respond aggressively and violently to day-to-day situations. If a kid is watching shows everyday with the f-word in them, they will start saying it too.

What you will find is that parents who have more conservative beliefs (such as Christians) will put more restrictions on their children’s reading and viewing material because there are more things they want to keep their children from getting desensitized to.

However, I would never agree with the statement that this is to keep the children from forming their own opinions, or being able to think for themselves. In fact, children can’t really think for themselves. You don’t even develop post-conventional morality or abstract logic and decision making skills until after the age of 12, and even then your frontal lobes are still developing all throughout your teens. So especially for young kids, what we see as their “thinking” is really just a product of the input.

So you’ll find that a lot of the age restrictions parents impose are ages like 12 and 16. [sidenote: for me, cell phone was 12, Facebook was 16, and dating was 16.] that’s because these ages are in the period of life when people actually do start thinking for themselves.

Christians aren’t brainwashed; we know that following Christ is a personal decision, and your parents can’t make it for you. I imagine that every Christian parent’s fondest wish is that their son or daughter would think for themselves, make their own decisions, and choose to have a personal relationship with their Lord and Saviour. Lots of us do. :) and those who do..did it because we wanted to. Not because we didn’t know any better :P

Thanks for the question! Peace and love! -Katherine

New Year's Reflections

At the beginning of 2015, I was broken. Broken like something that didn’t work right. Something had gone wrong in my brain and I was glitching. I had just come out of the worse year of my life, and January 2015 followed possibly the most serious emotional/psychological crisis of my young life. I wasn’t me. My self esteem was virtually nonexistent, replaced by omnipresent self loathing. All of my relationships were in shambles, corroded by incessant deceit and self sabotage. I honestly wasn’t sure how I was even still in school based on my grades. And I had strayed so far from the moral path I wanted to be on that I didn’t even recognize myself. I was broken. My life had become nothing but a toxic cycle of lies, guilt, tears, denial, avoidance, and self destructive habits*.

 And 2015 was the year that God fixed me. I am in awe of His care for me. He had orchestrated the perfect cure for the bugs in my system, because He knows what is good for His children. He reminded me of who I am. Summer 2015 was basically like a hard reset for me. Like when your laptop freezes so you hold the power button until it restarts. That’s what God did to me this summer. He sent me to Africa where I felt more alive and more myself than anywhere else ever before. He reminded me of the purpose He placed inside me and the plan He has for my life. Then He sent me to camp where I met girls who not only understood the regrets and struggles in my past, but could relate and sympathize, and they accepted and loved me unconditionally. I learned that I’m damaged, and I’m not perfect, and I glitch sometimes, but I’m still capable and usable and worthy of love. It’s amazing to feel God’s grace in the realest form I’ve ever felt it. The grace that makes me beautiful despite my flaws. The grace that makes me usable despite my weaknesses. The grace that justifies me. The grace that makes me worthy despite my wretched unworthiness. The grace that is so much greater than my perception of my imperfection. The grace that showed me that I can’t shrink myself into something that God cannot love because His irrevocable love transforms me into something greater than human measures. 

 2015 was a good year, by the grace of God. 

 *for the record, my self destructive habits weren't substance abuse or self harm. They were just skipping school and sucking dick. harmful but not quite as bad.

How do you feel about the scandals that revolved around the Christian brothers (sexual assault towards youth) in Newfoundland and other similar scandals? Things like this have caused many to loose confidence with their faith, what are your thoughts on that?

Hey baby! (Don’t be weirded out, I use a various terms of endearment with all my friends and acquaintances) 

And ugh. I have a bunch of different thoughts on this topic. I’ve heard soooo many different opinions on this. I’ve heard of churches going door to door to collect donations to bail priests out of jail, priests who were incarcerated for sexual assault on a minor. Now, the reliability of these reports is dubious, at best. I honestly cannot formulate an opinion on that idea, or its truth. Now, in my own church, we had a scandal a couple years back. One of the pastors at my church was convicted of sexual deviancy, the likes of which is apparently a crime. Man, I dunno what happened. It was kind of a mess, tbh. Obviously, he lost his job at my church and I’m pretty sure with the PAONL in general. I also think they told him he could be re-ordinated if he took counselling and stuff. 

First up. Obviously, pastors/priests/reverends/whatever are people just like the rest of us. They’re gonna screw up. That’s a-given. But when they screw up in such a way that it hurts other people, we absolutely must acknowledge it. We must acknowledge the damage done, and we must take steps to show that we acknowledge it and to attempt to rectify it. I am sorry, but child pornography, and sexually assaulting young boys, or whatever, that’s straight-up awful. And I would be in 100% agreement with the church if they fired the people who committed these crimes. Any other company would. We don’t have to pretend like we’re perfect. It’s no secret that we’re really not. To preach sexual purity and selflessness and love for others and a straight moral path and then to defend those who CLEARLY violate these teachings is hypocritical, it’s not grace. Hate the sin. Love the sinner. But really, really hate the sin. Don’t defend it. Don’t excuse it. Don’t justify it. Hate it. 

On the other side of that, grace is a part of this too. Churches are full of hypocrites. That’s why we’re there. We as Christians do not think we’re perfect, rather we are acutely aware of our imperfection. We strive everyday to become more Christlike but it is a battle against our very nature and by default is possible only by the grace of God. We absolutely must forgive and accept the people who commit these heinous crimes, because that’s what God does.

I know it’s really hard for us to wrap our brains around, but all sin is equal to God. Lying is the same as murdering. Envy is the same as rape. It sounds ludicrous to us, because human morals have a measurement of severity, based on the effects the transgressions have on the people around us. God’s only measurement is “perfect” or “not perfect” and any sin, no matter how awful, or how trivial, is in the “not perfect” category. Romans 3:23 says “for all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.” …”fallen short of the glory of God”. That’s what sin is. It literally means not being divine. Well if that’s the definition, then heck yeah everybody has sinned! 

So my point in saying that is that we need to forgive even the worst of humans, because we are just like them. I listened to this talk by Judah Smith about how we hate Barrabbas so much, the guy the jews told Pontias Pilate to free instead of Jesus. He was a murderer and they let him go free instead of Jesus! Like what the heck? Oh wait a minute…he’s me. Jesus bought his freedom just like he bought mine. We are all the same. We sin the same and God loves us the same. 

HOWEVER. All our actions have consequences. Forgiving someone and extending grace to them does not always mean that they will be exempt from the consequences of their actions. Losing your job and going to jail may be the consequences of your actions. So be it. That’s only fair, as far as fair goes on earth. 

And finally, people are gonna let you down. They’re going to shock, dismay, disappoint and hurt you. We are an imperfect being, plagued by mortality. But don’t give up on God. He’s the only one who will not disappoint you. I know His church screws up. I know some of His so-called “followers” are batcrap crazy. I know He gets a bad rep cause people misuse His label and they say one thing but do another. I know, I know, I know. I heard a comedian put it this way: “I like Elvis but I don’t like all his crazy fans.” This is why I think it’s so important for the church to be very careful about their reaction to scandals like this so that we demonstrate that we acknowledge the pain and the damage, we do not condone the behaviour, we apologize for it while still being gracious. It’s a very tricky situation. But at the end of the day, everyone’s relationship with God is their own business and their own responsibility. No one’s gonna take the credit or the blame for your eternity. My advice is to look past the stupid manmade institution called Religion. [Sidenote: I am a strong advocate of the church. I love the church. I think serving and being a part of a body of believers who will edify you in your faith is awesome.] Because God cannot be contained by a building or a group of people or a list of rules or even an idea in your head. 

God is bigger and greater than anything we’ve ever known or ever will know. He is the first, the last, the everything. He is in all and through all and nothing can be apart from Him. So don’t diminish Him to the church. Find out for yourself who He is. Read the Bible, spend time in prayer, don’t rely on secondhand information. Be a critical thinker and find out about God yourself. And find a church that you think exemplifies biblical values well and that you feel is good for you at this point in your life. 

That’s all I have to say :P 

Thanks for the question! Peace and love!-Katherine