THE GAYS ARE COMING
(or: who allowed me to have my own money)
i'm looking out a window
into a world that's taken you from me
and I'm feeling so disgusted
how pathetic can I possibly be?
little vent incoming ( sfw though! )
anyways my mental health's not doing well so this song's on repeat right now - comfort music and stuff.
it's half past eleven, i gotta get up at five a.m. & i can't sleep at all since my brain's going a mile a minute:-) dysphoria's also kicking ass again! fun times
this is the sweetest thing i've ever read oh my god♡_♡ i love
[Mavdad and Jake]
Looks like a winter bear, You sleep so happily
Jake didn’t mean to fall asleep. It’s just that the sofa was a massive, soft thing that sinks like a dream the moment you sit down, let alone when you snuggle deep into the cushions and especially when you’re halfway dead from a long ass day trip.
He can feel the coolness of the supple leather under the skin of his exposed arm as he lies on his side, feel the way it gives when he pulls his knees up closer to his belly and the tiny little squeak of skin on leather as he moves his right arm under his warm firm throw pillow.
Jake settles with a small inaudible sigh, finally happy with his new position.
“Well he’s sure is comfy.”
Jake stills. His brain is still foggy from sleep, but he’s waking up fast. His fingers, the ones gripping his throw pillow, flex reflexively around the - what the fuck the pillow flexed back?
“He’s tired, Bradley.” There’s the sound of a chuckle right above him and a hand in his hair - well. Shit. He’s been sleeping with his head in Mav’s lap. There’s a pause and the sound of someone unlocking their phone and the telltale sound of a camera app.
“I’m sending this to the group - it’s just too cute.” The humor is evident in Rooster’s voice and Jake scowls. “Holy shit Mav look - his face’s all scrunched up– fuck that’s adorable.”
Mav’s hand in Jake’s hair begins to brush through the fluffy blond mess. He remembers now that he came straight to Mav and Ice’s house from Lemoore on his first day of shoreleave, an unholy long drive that he would only ever put himself through for a very very select few people in his life. It used to be just the Machado family, but now Jake is proud (and a little bewildered) to say that he’s running out of fingers when he counts the members of “Jake Gives A Shit About You” club.
Wild how half a year ago his only definition of home is a room in the barracks or a bunk on his assigned carrier. Jake was just used to living out of his bags when every place he lands on is only temporary - too used to leaving before he can put down roots because he learned early on in life that putting down roots means risking having your roots yanked out of the ground and losing a few parts of yourself that you can’t get back.
But now his duffle bag is unpacked and his clothes (as little as they are given the short shoreleave) are neatly folded and put away in a nice mahogany wardrobe that Ice dragged out of storage for him, in a room with a bed covered in Kazansky family heirloom quilt, two doors down from the master bedroom.
His sneakers are in the cabinet in the foyer, his keys - the car and to this house- is in a little bowl on the foyer’s side table, his jacket hanging beside Mav’s letterman with a massive emblem of a winged dagger on its back (a gag gift from their special detachment - the emblem something that Fan drunkenly sketched out on a napkin that he pinched from Penny’s bar, declaring magnanimously that its now “Our coat of arms, chiquitas and chiquitos”).
Mav’s fingers shift lazily through Jake’s hair and tugs a little at the end before starting back from the roots. His thigh under Jake’s cheek is perfectly still even as his stomach quivers in his silent laughter at something that Rooster said. The savory scent of dinner earlier still wafts in the den, intermingling oddly with the scent of the reed diffuser on the small circular table by the window.
Jake can hear the sounds of the dishwasher closing and cutleries being put away, Ice’s and aunt Sarah’s voice a low murmur with the occasional peal of laughter from the Admiral’s sister. From outside, Jake can just hear the metallic sounds the basketball hoop makes as someone scores, excited yells from the kids just barely muffled by the house.
“RooRoo, I wanna play,” Little Jack’s voice carries over to their little hide-away, one of Rooster’s many sort-of cousins no doubt making grabby hands at his phone, judging by Rooster’s quiet laughter.
“No, Jack, hold on, I'm texting my friends– here, look you wanna say hi to Bobby?”
The steady sound of his phone’s notification from the coffee table tells Jake that there’s a lot of replies from their group chat - most likely in response to whatever picture of Jake napping in Mav’s lap that Rooster shared in the group. Jake doesn’t even feel the slightest bit annoyed by that. He’s in a house with two parents, little cousins, an aunt, and whatever Rooster is - nothing short of wild horses dragging him out of this house can upset him.
Rooster’s quiet laughter builds up to a cackle as Mav’s hand moves from his head to tuck his shoulders further into the couch, illogically worried that Jake was gonna roll off the furniture. Warmth spreads through Jake’s chest at that.
“Jack,” the cackle grows louder accompanied by the sounds of Jack’s high pitched laughter, “No no no don’t text that– ”
“Jackie, why don’t you and Bradley take this outside?” Mav hums and Jake feels the older man shift to bring him closer, his head snug in the cradle of Mav’s hips with his forearm across Jake’s chest. “I think the rest of the kids are playing a game or two on the court - you wanna show Bradley what Rueben taught you? Hey, Bradley, can you pass me the– yeah.”
“Pay was here?” Jake hears the surprise in Bradley’s tone. He hears the sound of soft fabric being moved off slippery leather and Mav’s whispered thanks as he feels softness and warmth drape over his legs to his waist. “When was that?”
“About a month ago, I think?” Mav’s voice is contemplative and his hand falls back on Jake’s shoulder, squeezing a little. “Just for dinner, he wasn’t around for long.” The hand rubs up and down his arm, massaging his sore muscles. “God, the drive must’ve really worn him out - poor kid.”
“RooRoo.” Jake hides his smile in Mav’s jeans. “Let’s goooooo.”
“Alright, alright - calm down, short stack.”
Jake hears the sounds of feet scrambling on carpet, the frantic footfall of little feet running out of the den and a calmer set following. His phone continues to ping with notifications on the coffee table, the only sound in the comfortable silence of the den. Jake opens his eyes slowly, pupils adjusting to the slightly dim golden light of the room- signs that the golden hour is coming to its tail-end . Jake takes a moment to just breathe, taking in lungfuls of the reed diffusers, the fabric softener Mav uses, faint scent of his own cologne, the smell of home.
He rolls his shoulder, dislodging Mav’s hand to fall to the dip of his waist as he shifts his body to lay flat on the sofa.
“Knew you were awake.” Mav jostles his thigh and Jake’s head shakes, drawing a short bark of laughter. “Don’t feel like socializing?”
“Nah,” Jake hums. He looks up at Mav and smiles. “Wanna spend time with my old man.”
Mav smiles back at him, green eyes as soft as the first time they really looked at Jake in that emergency room months ago. Pulling up the throw blanket, Jake turns to lie on his side, his face buried in Mav’s stomach and Mav’s hand caressing the back of his head.
He falls asleep.
omg❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
I bet Mobius would've liked Loki's play
same, oh my god. this song is otherworldly. combined with the breathtaking scenery of talokan? MAGIC.
that was an out of body experience!
i lovee love loooove this whole movie, but this scene is by FAR my favorite. i was so gone i didn't even notice that i had my mouth open haha
100/10 film. representation (!!!) , story, relationships, characters, music, settings, EVERYTHING.
a work of art.
Con La Brisa from the Black Panther: Wakanda Forever album is so fucking addictive. Just came back from watching the movie, it was amazing and the song has been on repeat since I came out of the theater.
i made two lokius playlists (angst & fluff) that currently have around 15-20 songs and are still growing, would any of y'all like me to upload the list here?👀
there a mix of lots of stuff in there as my music taste is very much chaotic lol - deftones, hozier, tv girl, lana del rey, linkin park, queen, sufjan stevens, etc.
pretty much just songs i thought fit to lokius in some kind of way, or songs that i saw in lots of the amazing lokius edits popping up here and there:-D
it will get updated as i find more♡
just pre-ordered the papercuts zoetrope picture vinyl I'M SO EXCITEEEEED
🥹❤️🩹 sometimes you just need someone to tell you that it's okay & that they're there no matter what
Thinking about Wade just... being normal(?) For a day. Doing house hold chores, watching shitty live tv, goes out to walk Puppins, showering with no smart remarks.
Yes, he still hums and taps on stuff, but it's much.. calmer.. now. In the sense that he doesn't want to cause a scene and would rather just be left alone right now.
But then... when he gets out. Surely he's going to be his silly self and say something, right?? Right???? Wrong.
He just... sits there. Boredly looking at those free magazines that you find sometimes at doctors' offices. The ones that are like "Home improvment for your loved one with dementia" or "50 dinner ideas for someone with diabetes"
Logan just blinks after watching him all day and goes "...Are you okay?"
Without a beat, he awnsers pretty monotoned. "I can't be manic all the time. That's just stupid to think." Before realizing he said it outloud. He perks up and starts laughing. "I mean- Yeah I'm great! What about you, Tiger?"
Again Logan just stares, blinking some as he tries to process.
"....How long have you kept up that act..?"
"I don't know what you're talking about, pumpkin!" It was like watching someone trying to impersonate themsleves.
"....Wade.."
"What is it cupcake?"
"...You don't have to do that."
"Do what? Gosh your so silly. My silly little sunflower."
Logan just stares at him for a bit more and quickly he panics, swallowing and starting to say anything he can to make him believe it was a joke but he dosn't believe a single word of it.
"...its not an act.. is it?"
It eventually ends with wade running out of excuses or things to lie about. He sits there, tears starting to run down his face as he thinks of words to say. You can see just how desperate he is to say something but he can't seem to get it out.
"..I....I-i."
"I know."
Wade just looks at him with this big scared eyes as if he was about to accuse him of faking or telling him he liked this wade better or something terrible like asking how to keep him this way but Logan pulls him into a side hug.
"...are you okay?"
His throat tightens, shaking his head. "..no."
"That's okay." Turning to give him an actual hug, Wade cries. Not because he's sad though. But because to Logan, it doesn't matter how high or low he was on the chart, who he was or how he acted. He loves him. He understands that acting like a crazy childish phycopath isn't a mask but rather who he was sometimes. And sometimes he prefered to silently lay his head on his shoulder.
Eventually Logan asks him if he has a personality disorder and Wade just shrugs. "Probably.... is that an issue..?"
"No.... do you want diagnosed?"
Wade pauses, remembers the last time he asked for medical help and shakes his head. "Nah... I'm good.. besides. I've come to like him."
"How long has he been in there?" Logan playfully knocks on his head and wade giggles a bit. A genuine true laugh. "I don't know. Probably forever.... are you sure it's not a problem?" He bites his tounge, waiting for the "because I like him better" but it never came.
"Why would that be a problem? Sure, you're a pain the ass but you're my pain in the ass." He says, mindlessly sitting for a second before quickly saying "DON'T-"
As wade is on the brink of explosion from laughter and some smirky comments.
can we start a petition to get owen wilson on one of those w magazine asmr videos because man i could listen to him talk for hours
(i can't be the only one thinking he's got such a calm voice right? pls)
HE WAS CRYING?! NOOO BABE HE SLAYED THE WHOLE HOUSE
bisexuality lost tonight
C | 18+ | they/them | huge cinema nerd☆ caution: showcasing of my obsessions! °~make chester proud~°
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